Don't Be Like That
by BeMyEscapeSupernatural
Summary: a story of love, lost, heartache and family. Dean's childhood friend Ryder, is all grown up. Can he deal with her back in his life. Can she keep her emotions in check around him. Whats in store for their future. set in Season 3. Dean/oc Sam/oc & more oc's
1. Chapter 1

**i do not own this story it belongs to a friend of mines ( mz. ashleigh )**

**she and i do not own supernatural or Dean, Sam or Bobby or anyone from the show you may notice. **

**mz. ashleigh only owns the idea of the story and her oc's**

**thanks for taking the time and understanding this.**

**now plz enjoy and be come a fan of this wonderful story just like me :)**

**XOXO**

**Don't Be Like That**

**by mz. ashleigh**

Prologue.

The pain in her back getting worse, her eyesight going dim. She prayed that she would get to her Uncle before the darkness took her over. A shaky hand changed gears, and her car continued down the dark, deserted road. She leant her head back for a breif moment, willing for the pain to just disappear. A tear falling from her sad eyes. She couldn't handle it any more, she shifted gears, and sped the rest of the way. A wave of relief began to wash over her, as she seen the junkyard up ahead. "Please, be home. Please Uncle Bobby, I need you." she said, her voice shaking.

She turned into the driveway, and drove slowly up to her Uncle's house. Seeing the figure of a man, sitting on the porch, she calmed a little. Until she saw his face. "Oh god!" she said.

* * *

Dean Winchester, sat out on Bobby's porch, legs perched up on the railing infront of him, a cold beer in his hand. Two months ago, him and Sammy had moved in with Bobby. He'd asked them too just after they'd destroyed the Demon. Dean was relieved to have a stable home, with something to keep his mind off the hunt, and the deal he'd made. There was endless amounts of cars for him to lose himself in. There was also Ryder, a girl he'd met on a previous hunt, who turned out to be Bobby's niece. He shuddered, Bobby had told him to keep his sex crazed hands off her, and if he didn't he'd cut them off. Knowing Bobby as well as he did, Dean didn't doubt a word.

He remembered the first time he'd seen her again. They'd ended up tracking the same hunt, and ran into eachother in a rundown diner. Dean, was being his usual, sex crazed self. He had been staring at her from the table behind her, when she got up to leave, all it took was a look at her face. His mouth had dropped open, Sam on the other hand stood. Wrapping her into a tight hug, which was returned instantly. Her and Sam seemed to have hit it off, both being book smart, just Ryder had alot of fight in her aswell, like Dean. Dean didn't say anything to her, he just looked on as her and Sam spoke.

-Flashback-  
In the short time they'd met, she'd played hard to get. Never using his first name, always calling him Winchester. Sam on the other hand, was always Sammy, and not once did she get told not to call him that. She was still playing her game with him, pretending she'd hadn't noticed him. Turning, catching his eyes on her she smirked. "So, you gonna stand there slack-jawed, or you gonna get up and hug me?" she asked, eyeing him. He stood slowly, though still not talking. He stepped closer, and pulled her into a tight hug. "Geez, Winchester. I'm only human!" came her muffled voice. He let her go, hands resting on her shoulders. "Dean?" she asked, voice a little nervous. He snapped out of it. "You look great." he said, turning on his usual cocky voice.

"I heard you boys finished off the Demon." she said, turning back to Sam. "How do you know?" Dean said, voice full of shock. Ryder turned to look at him, when a male voice came from behing her. "Ry come on, we gotta hit the road." She turned and mirrored the man's tough stance. "Get the car started, I'll be a minute." She turned back to the boys. "It's good to see you again, both of you. Your stupid," she said, stepping forward, planting a soft kiss on Dean's cheek. "And your lucky." she said, pulling Sam into a tight hug. "See ya." She ran outside, jumping into the started car. Waving as it sped off.

"HEY THOSE TWO CUT WITHOUT PAYING!" called the waitress. Sam stood a smile on his face, "Dude, she was made for you."

-End Flashback-

Since then he'd seen her more and more, they often flirted, but nothing ever came of it. She still played hard to get, normally just when he would attempt to kiss her, she'd turn away. Pretending she had no intentions of heading in that direction. Normally, he'd give up by now, but this girl was breathtaking. He heard the sound of crunching gravel, his eyes looked down the driveway, seeing to headlights coming up the driveway. He recognised the car instantly, it was a 1969 Dodge Charger, it was black, and had silver racing stripes along it. "Ryder." he said to himself. He stepped down the stairs slowly, stopping just infront of the car. Her eyes locked with his, and the door swung open. Ryder pulled herself out of the car, and stood there holding the door.

"Dean?" her shakey voice said. That was all she needed to say, she called him Dean, not Winchester. There was definately something wrong. His eyes scanned her, stopping on a dark patch, forming at the side of her shirt. He stepped closer, to her grabbing her outstretched arms. "It's ok, your okay. I got ya." he said, pulling her into his arms, looking over her shoulder. He pulled her shirt up slowly, revealing a large gash along her lower back. "Dean?" her voice was softer now, she was getting tired. "It's ok. Come on." They took a step towards the house, but Ryder's legs went from under her. Catching her quickly, Dean panicked. "BOBBY!!!" he screamed. Putting an arm under her legs , the other in the middle of her back, picking her up slowly. She leaned her head against his chest, eyes staring into his.

"What? Oh christ. Is she okay?" Bobby asked, running out to them. Dean shook his head, "I don't think so." He saw Sam run out the door, eyes falling on the body in Dean's arms. "I'll get the bedroom ready." he turned and ran back into the house, gathering supplies on the way. "Quick, lets get her inside." Bobby ran to help Sam, Dean carried her in carefully. She coughed, and called his name again. Looking down at her, he saw fear in her eyes. "You wouldn't let him hurt me again, would you?" she asked, voice soft, and full of pain. Dean stepped carefully up the staircase. "Let who hurt you again?" he asked, curiously.

"You." she said, closing her eyes. He stepped quickly into the bedroom, placing her gently down on the towels Bobby had laid on the bed. "Ry, stay with me. What do you mean, me?" he coaxed. Her eyes fluttered open, looking up at his worried face. "Shifter, with your face." Dean bared his teeth, then saw she was falling into unconciousness. "No, darlin' come on now. You can't go to sleep now, you gotta try and stay awake for me." Her eyes looking into his, searching for something, and obviously finding it. "I knew he wasn't you. He was hurting me. I told him you'd never hurt me. He got angrier, said he was the real Dean Winchester. b*st*rd got me with my own knife." Dean, brushed her hair from her face, which was lengths shorter than the last time he'd seen her.

"What happened to your hair?" he asked, trying to keep her awake, hoping Bobby would be in soon. "I was trying to get away, but he grabbed my hair. So I used these," she pulled two knives from each of her boots, dropping them on the floor beside him. "to cut it off. I wasn't gonna let him have me." Dean smiled, he loved how fiesty the girl was. "Is this why you kept sayin' my name before?" he asked, wiping away the tears that were now falling from her eyes. She said nothing, just nodded. "Bobby, quick." Dean yelled, hand brushing her hair softly, in an attempt to calm her down. "I'm comin', just washing me hands boy!" came his frantic voice. "I gotta get your shirt off ok." Dean said, quietly. He sat on the left side of the bed, and lifted her top half up, her head coming to rest on his shoulder. He pulled the bottom of it up halfway up her small body. She sat back a little, letting him pull it off completely.

"You know, I didn't expect you to see me half naked tonight." she said, a smirk on her face. Dean helped her to lay on her stomach. As Sam entered the room. He stopped just by the door, leaning against the wall. Dean's eyes never left Ryder, but he knew he was there. "Here kiddo, hold this while I go about me business. Dean, I want you to keep her talkin'." Bobby ordered. Sam sat on the floor next to Bobby eyeing the cut on her back. "Is she gonna be okay?" he asked Bobby. Bobby stared at the wound, cleaning it carefully. "She'd wanna be, cause your brother will go after whatever did it. He don't have forever to get this thing." he whispered back.

"Hey, I saved your ass. You can't deny your hero a date this time, can ya?" Dean teased, hoping to keep her going. Her eyes opened, looking up into his beautiful green eyes. "I was only sayin' no, cause I was scared of my feelings. I don't wanna fall for you, then lose you in the end." she said, so quietly no one but him had heard it. Dean wiped away her tears again. "Well, I got less than a year left. Thought I'd give commitment a try." He whispered into her ear. "When I can move again, Winchester, I swear I'll kick your ass." Dean smiled, "Why?" She closed her eyes, as Bobby rubbed alcohol into the wound. She bared her teeth. "For makin' me fall for your pretty ass." she said, through the pain.

"Ok, darlin' I'm gonna start stitchin' okay. Just focus on Dean, and try to blank through it." Bobby said, a voice full of parental concern. If a stranger was in the room with them, they'd have probably believed Bobby was her father. Her mother had been Bobby's little sister, this resulted in a slight family resemblence. Ryder had inherited Bobby's temper though, that's what made her so feisty. "Dean?" she called. He looked down, his hand falling onto the back of her head, brushing through the now neck length hair. "Mmm?" was all the could say. "Don't leave me tonight. I don't wanna be alone." Dean just nodded. He looked at Bobby, who was concentrating on sewing up the long, deep gash. Sammy, who'd been quiet the whole time, was eyeing Dean. He knew Sam was thinking about the night he'd been stabbed in the back.

"Hey, you okay little brother?" Dean called. Sam's head snapped up. "Uh huh. Yeah. Are you?" He was lying, Dean could hear it in his voice. "Fine. Sammy, I'm alright." Dean turned his attention back onto Ryder. Her hand was now holding his t-shirt in a tight fist. The pain was starting to get to her, more tears were falling from her beautiful eyes. Dean pulled his free hand up and placed it gently on her fist, brushing light fingers over it. She was watching him carefully, seeming more worried about him than herself. They were so alike in ways, and so different in others. He watched her face carefully, noticing small amounts of bruising, coming up on her cheek. "Sammy pass me a clean washcloth." He heard Bobby ask.

Ryder's face was relaxing, her eyes were closed. Her dark hair, falling across her face. She wasn't asleep, just resting. Her dark skin about three shades lighter, and she sweating from the pain. Dean brushed the hair out of her face, her beautiful skin, soft under his fingers. Her eyes opened again, staring passed him, and out of the window. Those eyes that had stopped him in his tracks only a year earlier. Eyes so unique, he'd never forget them, even if he'd never seen her again. Her eyes were something you don't see everyday, her left eye was a hazel brown, her right, was a chocolate brown, both large, and full of life. But not tonight. Tonight, they were full of pain, and full of tears. Her small body, laying tiredly on the bed, as she was tended by her Uncle.

Soon, Bobby was done. Sam left the room with the bloodstained cloths. A small tear fell from Bobby's eye as he leaned down and kissed her temple. "Stay with her. I gotta call her Daddy." Bobby whispered. Dean nodded, watching the man leave the room. Dean stood, only to be pulled back down by Ryder's ironlike grip on his shirt. "I'm just goin' to grab a t-shirt for you to wear. I'll be right back." She nodded, and let go. He stepped out of the room, and into the room he was sharing with Sam. He grabbed a clean black t-shirt from his duffle bag, smelling it to make sure it was really as clean as it looked. He turned on his heel, and headed back into the room across the hall.

"You gonna dress me now too?" she asked, smirk plastered in place. Dean nodded. "Well aren't I spoilt?" came her reply. He chuckled, and helped her sit up on the edge of the bed. She lifted her arms slowly, face scruching up with the pain. He pulled the shirt down over her body, gently. Letting it fall down over her beautifully curved body. She kicked off her boots and laid back down slowly. Dean had helped her remove her bra before Bobby had come in earlier, he mentally kicked himself, when he realised he hadn't actually looked at her breasts. "Too bad." she said, looking up at him, "You'll just have seduce me on our "date"." she said, sarcastically. She rolled carefully onto her side, pulling the sheet up over her. "Don't be like that. You know you want a night with me." he said, his signature smirk in place.

"Oh please," she said, voice full of mock seriousness. "Get your head outta the damn gutter." Dean laughed. Her look changed and she got serious. "I was terrified when I saw you standing there earlier. I thought he'd followed me." she said, fingers brushing her hair back out of her face. "You don't needa be scared of me. I wouldn't do anything to hurt you." he said, all sarcasm gone from his voice. "If I see that son of b*tch around here though. I'm gonna put him in the ground." Ryder smiled and patted the space infront of her. "Lay with me?" she said, not really asking, more telling him. He kicked his boots off and went to sit ontop of the sheets. She smiled and shook her head, pulling the sheets back. He got in next to her, turning his head to meet her gaze.

"I knew you wouldn't hurt me." she said, her voice growing soft. He put his arm underneath her neck, her head resting on his shoulder. He brought his hand up to run his fingers through her torn hair. "No, I'd never hurt you like that." he said, staring down at the body, that was now cuddled up to his. It only took a couple of seconds for her to fall into a deep sleep. Only then did he let the small tear fall from his eye. The thought of something with his face doing this to a girl he cared about, really scared him. The fact that she was terrified when she'd seen him earlier, also made his heart heavy. It wasn't long before Dean joined Ryder in unconciousness.

* * *

Half an hour later, Bobby hung up the phone. Slamming it down on the reciever. "Asshole." he said outloud. He scrubbed his face, and stood up. He wondered up to the bedroom, where he had left Dean with Ryder. He opened the door, poking his head in to check on them. What he seen when he walked in made a smile cross his face. "Well, I'll be damned." he said to himself. Ryder was sleeping with her resting on Dean's shoulder, her arm resting over his torso. Dean had his arm around her, his hand gently resting on her hair. His face was turned towards her, lips only inches away from her forehead. The sight made his heart swell, neither of them looked as though they'd been through hell.

Dean, had just come to terms with the fact that in 10 months, his life would be over. He'd been losing himself in the cars that Bobby had sprawled out in his yard. He'd been spending plenty of time with Sam, telling him stories from their childhood, so Sam had other memories of Dean, that didn't have to do with the hunt. He'd been completely different lately, changing to make his last year one for everyone else to remember. The poor guy was scared out of his mind.

Ryder, had just been beat up by a guy with Dean's face. A man she'd trusted, a man who had once saved her from her sister's crazy boyfriend. A man, Bobby believed, she loved. He'd watched the way Dean had been with her, while he was doing his best to mend his niece. It was a side of Dean that usually only came out when Sammy was hurt. Dean cared deeply for his niece, which made him change his opinion on the possibility of a relationship between the two. Seeing the two the way they were right now proved something to Bobby, those kids, were made to for eachother.

Sam came in behind Bobby, eyes on the two bodies cuddled together. "It's just like Jackson says." Sam said to Bobby. "Those two really are a love story waiting to happen." Bobby smiled. He turned his eyes to Sammy. "Lord knows they both need it." They left the room, turning the light off on the way out. They left the door open a crack, so they could hear if anything went wrong. They decided they weren't going to be sleeping anytime soon, so they sat out on the porch, both reflecting on the nights events.

* * *

Dean woke up the next morning, to the sound of Ryder's soft breathing. His eyes stayed closed for a few minutes, the sun coming through the window hurting his eyes. When he did open them, he saw that they hadn't moved all night, both laying comfortably in the same position as the night before. Ryder's face had more colour to it this morning, though it was still a little too pale for his liking. She'd warmed up again, when he'd gotten into bed with her, her cold body had made goosebumps breakout on his body. He heard footsteps, then saw Bobby's head poke in. He stepped inside the door, coffee in hand. "Here ya go, son." he said, as Dean carefully sat up a little, resting his back against the wall. Ryder's head now resting on his stomach. "Thanks." he said, taking the mug.

"She's looking much better today." Bobby said, looking at her face. "Yeah, she's warmer today too. Almost normal." Dean answered. The bruising on her face had come out over night, and made her cheekbone stand out. "Her daddy's blamin' me for her bein' hurt. Sayin' I shoulda gone with her to Dallas." Bobby said, looking back towards Dean. "I told him none of this woulda happened if he hadn't split her and Jackson up." Dean looked confused, "He sent her to deal with a shifter.. alone?" he asked. Bobby nodded, "Yup. Jackson's on his way here now. Freaked out when I told 'im. Says he's gonna have a talk to his Daddy." Dean smirked, remembering the fun he'd had with Jackson.

"She's gonna be out for a while. Go take a hot shower, I'll watch her for a while." Bobby said, looking over Dean's face. "Yeah, I think I'll take you up on that." Dean said, yawning. Together he and Bobby moved Ryder carefully, so that she was now resting against a pile of pillows, half sitting, so that her blood kept circulating properly. Dean watched as Bobby pulled a chair up to the bed, taking Ryder's hand into his own. Eyes full of guilt. Her father's words had gotten to him, Dean could see it. He walked across the hall and gathered what he needed, heading to the bathroom down the end of the hallway. "Please, be okay." he said to himself, as he stripped and got under the water.

* * *

Bobby sat just watching Ryder's chest slowly rise and fall. His face etched with worry, eyes full of pain. He'd seen her only days before, and she was fine, she'd been sparring with Dean in the yard. The beaten girl that laid before him, looked like a completely different person, she looked so weak and so vulnerable. Her face so pale and bruised, hair cut badly, and grazes all over her hands. Bobby squeezed her hand a little, hoping it would let her know someone was there. It was clear Ryder had held up a good fight. He remembered when she was 15, her first hunt had gone sideways, and she was sulking in the scrapyard. He'd told her, "If ya can't kill it, fight long enough to get away." She'd obviously remembered his advice.

She shifted a little, mumbling something that Bobby didn't quite catch. Her right arm coming to rest protectively over her stomach, a habit she'd always had, that often reminded him of Dean. That's when a small black bracelet caught his attention, he sat forward to examine it. It was thin, with a small silver charm on it, a protection charm. Instantly he knew who'd made it. Dean had learnt to make them when he was 6, Bobby had taught him while John was off on a hunt. Dean was trying to protect her from demons, too bad shifters didn't steer clear of these things.

"Is she alright?" came a familiar voice. Bobby looked up, finding his nephew's tall frame standing in the doorway. "Yeah, she's gonna be just fine. She's just sleepin' it off." Jackson sighed, stepping into the room. "I drove all night just to get here." he said, coming to a stop next to the bed. "You talked to your Daddy?" Bobby asked. His nephew shook his head. "Nope. He's been tryin' to call though. I just wanted to be with my sister." Bobby nodded, letting go of Ryder's hand, and adjusting his old cap. "Your a good kid." he said, as he stood up, "Just a little cocky." Jackson smiled, "Isn't that in the genes?" Jackson asked, ducking Bobby's headswat. "Your definately your mother's son." Bobby said, walking out of the room.

Everytime he looked at Ryder and Jackson, he saw his baby sister. Her beauty lived on through her daughter, her quick wit in her son. He always had tried to keep them safe, with the fear that he might lose them like he did their mother. Growing up they'd spent less time with him, but as soon as they hit their teens, they came running, sick of their father's neglegence. Jackson was in trouble, drinking, fights and drug experimentation. Ryder, was trying to keep him together, whilst trying to pass her classes. Ryder had also been trying to fight off her own demons, and to this day, Bobby had no idea what exactly her's were.

* * *

It was going on 11 when Ryder's eyes fluttered open, the bright sunlight shining in her eyes. Groaning, she lifted her arm to cover her eyes. "Damn sunlight." she drawled, to noone in particular. "What's wrong? You turn into a Vampire in our time apart, baby sis?" came an all too familiar voice. "Naw, just decided sleep was better than seeing your goofy face." she countered, laughing when she finally looked up at her big brother. "Ry, that hurts. It really does." he said, mocking her. Ryder pulled herself up against the pillows, her nose screwing up a little as her stitches pulled.

She adored her older brother, she looked up to him. She always felt safer in his presence, like his love would protect her from everything. He wasn't the toughest looking guy, but he knew how to fight which helped. His dark jaw length, always looked shaggy and untamed, his tanned face often hidden beneath it. He was blessed with their mother's beautiful chocolate brown eyes, something he was secretly proud of, yet chose to keep hidden.

"Heard you shared a bed with Deano last night?" her brother drawled, putting his booted feet up on the bed infront of him. "Yeah? So?" she said, absently. Jackson smiled, not even bothering to answer her question, knowing it would turn into an argument. "Does it hurt much?" Ryder thought a minute, crossing her arms across her chest. "It's not so bad today. Last night, boy, that was horrible. You think it'll scar?" she asked, suddenly sounding excited. "Your a freak, you know that? Knowin' you, probly not. You never scar, cept for that one through ya eyebrow." he answered, pointing to his own eyebrow to make his point.

Ryder huffed, looking down at her arms. She hadn't noticed all the small cuts and bruises on them the previous night. She looked up to Jackson, who was examining her from his seat, and judging by the look on his face, she must've been in bad shape. "That bad?" she asked, quietly. He didn't speak, just nodded. Slowly he moved onto the bed next to her, leaning his back against the wall. A long, lanky arm came around her shoulder. "Please be more careful, I don't know what I'd do if anything ever happened to you. We already lost Mom, I don't wanna lose you too." he said, hugging her. She leant her head on her brother's strong shoulder, a tear falling down her cheek.

They sat that way for ages, neither saying anything. They'd been close their whole lives, only really having eachother to turn to as children. Between their father's neglect, and his always being in hospital. Jackson had been a parent to her, until she hit 15. That year Ryder became the parent, with Jackson always getting into trouble, she would take care of him when he was sick, even if most times it was self-induced. They were all they had left, especially after their father remarried, bringing a new "Mom" and sister into the picture. A sister who had tried to have Ryder murdered a year before. A thought that Ryder knew still haunted her brother.

At around 1 in the afternoon, Jackson went out with the others. Ryder thought she'd been left alone, silently freaking out at the thought. "Suck it up, kid. You still got Sasha." she told herself, thinking of her Uncle's dog. Slowly she swung her legs off of the side of the bed, pushing herself up carefully. When she stood Dean's shirt was hanging off of her, making her realise just how much larger than her he was. She tucked the shirt into the back of her torn denim shorts, making it look a little less gigantic on her. She turned, and made her way to the bathroom.  
After, she'd finished using the toilet, she washed her hands properly, removing all of the dried blood from her knuckles. She looked up into the mirror and sighed, 'I'll have to visit Claire soon, she'll fix this.' she thought, frowning at her tattered hair.

Opening the door, she stepped out into the hallway, and stopped. Deciding whether to go back to bed, or attempt to go downstairs and eat. Her stomach beat her back in the argument, and she slowly made her way to the stairs. Her hand grabbing a firm hold on the faded old banister, she stepped down carefully, breathing evenly through the pain. A few more steps down she stopped, hearing a noise downstairs. She turned and looked back over her shoulder, thinking about returning to her room, when she heard the footsteps headed her way, she just froze. Eyes searching for the source of the noise. Hunter's instacts kicking in over girlish fear. When the source came into sight, she relaxed. "Now what would Bobby say if he saw you standin' there?" his deep voice said.

"I thought I was here alone." she said, remaining where she was. She ran her hand softly along the banister, absently staring at the man. "Naw, I stayed back. Didn't really feel like pizza." he drawled. Ryder smiled, "You love pizza." she countered. "Well yeah, I do. But someone had to stay here." Ryder's eyes darted to the floor, instantly feeling like a burden. "Sorry." Dean sighed, walking up the stairs. Stopping a few below her, so he could catch her eyes. "Please don't play the Sammy card. One of him is enough. Want me to help you the rest of the way down?" She looked down into his eyes, saw nothing but warmth behind them. Something inside her trusted him, but a tiny part of her still held fear. She nodded, holding a hand out to him.

"Come here." he said, stepping up to meet her. Lifting her up into his arms, "You really think I'm gonna let ya just walk down the stairs in the shape your in?" he said, eyes on her as he stepped down the stairs one at a time. "I was hoping so." she said, quietly. "Too bad, short stuff. I'm the boss." was his reply. "Your a true romantic, Winchester." Ryder said, rolling her eyes. "Now there's the girl we all know and love." He placed her gently in one of the kitchen chairs, infront a cooked lunch. "You knew I was up?" she asked. "Uh, no. I was gonna bring it up, but I heard you in the bathroom." Dean answered, pointing a thumb up towards the stairs. "Oh, thanks."

"Dean?" Ryder asked, a few minutes later. He had his back to her, he'd been doing the dishes Bobby had left in the sink. "Yeah?" he said. She coughed and sat up a little. "Thanks for stayin' with me last night. I just needed to get over what happened." she said, almost to quick for Dean to pick up. "You mean you were still a little scared of me, even when I was helping you?" he said, turning to meet her gaze. She didn't speak, she just nodded, hoping he wouldn't be mad. He just sighed, coming to squat infront of her. "Kid, the day I hurt you and mean it, is the day Sammy will admit his a giant girl." Dean said, pushing some of her hair behind her ear.

* * *

After Dean had finished the dishes he'd carried her back upstairs. Ryder had taken a shower, was wearing her own clothes, and happy that her hair looked a little better. Dean had cleaned her stitches, and put a fresh piece of gauze on. They now were so bored, they started playing cards. Ryder propped up on the pillows, Dean cross legged on the bed infront of her. "Aha. I win, again." Ryder said, giggling at the confused look on Dean's face. "Dude, this game sucks out loud." he said, throwing his cards down. "Your a sore loser, Dean Winchester." Ryder stated, picking the cards up to shuffle them.

"Am not. Your just cheating." he said, a childlike tone to his voice. Ryder shook her head handing the deck over. "Fine, you deal." He took them and dealed the next hand, looking almost certain he could beat her this time. Minutes later, he was over it, throwing his cards down after another ass whooping. "You out hustled a hustler." Ryder nodded, "Learnt from the best." He looked away. "Your evil." She put the cards on the bedstand next to her. "About that date?" she said, voice slightly more softer than usual. "I'll do it, on my terms." Dean looked at her, unsure whether she was telling him the truth. "Your being serious?" he said, eyes wide. Ryder laughed, sitting back into the pillows. "I'm serious."

There was an awkward silence. Dean examined the woman infront of him. Ryder was slowly getting tired again, but she was trying to hide it, staring blankly out of the window. He moved up the bed, sitting next to her, feet crossing at the ankles, arms folded across his chest. She turned her head slowly, tired eyes coming to rest on his face, a small smile on her lips. "My mom always used to tell me, that one day, a beautiful man would come and rescue me from my fears. She said, that he'd be so strong and so powerful, that nothing would ever dare to hurt me again." Dean nodded, listening to her story, it wasn't often she spoke of her mother. "He's closer to us than you may think. That's what she'd always say to me. I went crazy for years, thinking about that. I thought it was just a story, you know. She'd tell me every night before I went to sleep. Our little habit." Dean smiled, "My mom used to tell me that angels were watchin' over me."

Ryder sighed. "But when I met you last year, when you stormed into that room, to save me. I knew what my Mom was tryin' to tell me. I believe that she saw that happen years before it did, that she knew that you lived here with Bobby sometimes. I think I'm just being crazy, but I think we were supposed to meet." She shook her head, turning back to the window. "Well, I didn't storm in, I kicked the door down. You don't sound crazy, because your Mom was probably right. Bobby said she was like Missouri. I like to think my Mom told me the truth, I believe she's the angel that's watchin' over me." Ryder yawned, turning her gaze back to him.

"I know she was." was all Ryder said, resting her head softly against Dean's. "You think I'm beautiful, huh?" he whispered to her. "Mmm, I do." she said, just before she drifted into another round of sleep.

* * *

"She's lookin' good." Bobby said, from his spot at the doorway. Dean hadn't noticed Bobby there, he'd been watching Ryder sleep. "Yeah, she ate a full meal before, and took a shower. Her colours coming back good too." His eyes never really leaving her. Bobby stepped forward, sitting on the edge of the bed. His hand resting firm on Dean's shoulder. "Thank you, for taking care of her. You were always good with that side of things. Your Daddy never had so much as a nurturin' bone in his body. It's good to see your Momma's in there too." Bobby smiled and patted Dean's cheek. "She needs someone like you right now. Don't let her down." With that Bobby got up and left the room. "Was that your way of sayin' I can touch her now?" Dean called after him, not recieving any form of answer.

Bobby made his way back out to the porch, sitting between Sam and Jackson. "How's she lookin'?" Sam asked. "As beautiful as the day she was born." Bobby answered. "Her colours back, and she's sleeping again. So, don't even think about lightin' that cracker boy." Jackson flinched, dropping the lighter, and turned, "I hate it when you do that." Sam laughed, "Dude, you totally need to grow up." Jackson smirked, pulling open his jacket. "You should stop now. I'll never grow up. Check out Batman." he drawled, pointing to his t-shirt. Sam shook his head. "Just what I need. Another Dean."

Jackson sobered up, looking at his uncle. "Do you think what Mom saw was true?" he asked, a serious tone sounding strange on him. "I think so, Jacky." Sam looked from one to the other, eyes showing his obvious confusion. "Mom had premonitions, not the gory, creepy kind like yours. She saw the future, the good kind." Jackson told him. Bobby nodded, "She told me that Ryder would meet a man who could save her from her fears. Ryder is terrified of death, knowing it will destroy Jacky. Dean saved her from that." Sam's eyes widened. "So, what your sayin' is? Dean was meant to meet her last year?"

"Yep. Problem is, Ryder's supposed to save him now. Missouri called this mornin', said a contact of her's had a vision about Ryder. She was at the crossroads." Bobby told him, eyes full of worry. Sam looked out across the wreckage. "There's gotta be another way?" Sam said, distractedly. "We gotta keep her here." Jackson said. Bobby smiled, "As long as he's here. She'll be here." His finger pointing the the room above them.

* * *

THREE WEEKS LATER.

Ryder sat on the roof of Bobby's house, throwing her pocket knife up and catching it again. Eyes fixed on the horizon. She was thinking of a way to make a date, comfortable for both herself and Dean. He was still bugging her about it, and she still had no idea of what to do. Her eyes fell on Dean's Impala, and instantly her mind set to work. She smiled, "Damn, I'm just too good." she said to herself. She caught her knife, and looked back out over the yard. She heard the door bang open underneath her, she prepare herself for what was coming next.

"Damn it Girl, get your ass down here. You just recovered from a damn gash in the back. What you gotta a deathwish or somethin'." came her Uncle's familiar voice. She stood, and climbed back down the ladder at the side on the house. "Calm down. I've been doin' that for years." she said, breezing passed him. "Girl, your gonna be the death of me." he said, as he followed her. "Oh please. Beer and Demons will be the death of you. I, just test your ticker." she said, running up the stairs past Dean. "What's she running from so fast?" he asked, stepping down off the last step. "Me. I swear that girl is more like me everyday." Dean shook his head, and patted Bobby on the back. "I thought one was bad enough."

"Oh, you smart ass." said, swatting Dean on the back of the head. "So, she's leaving today?" Dean asked, trying to act casual. Bobby nodded, looking up at the stairs. "She does have a home to go to." Bobby answered. Dean pursed his lips, and lifted an eyebrow. "You tryin' to say you want me outta here?" Bobby laughed a full hearted laugh. "No, son. I'm sayin' she doesn't stay for long intervals."

There was a thundering noise coming from the staircase. A mixture of boots, and a bag dragging. Ryder appeared in the doorway. "Right. Well I'm ready." She dropped her bag, and rushed over to Bobby. Hugging him tightly, then kissing his bearded cheek. "Thanks, for havin' me." Bobby smiled. "Anytime, darlin'." Ryder turned to Dean. "How bout you be a gentlemen, and carry my bag to my car?" Dean stepped forward, picking up her bag. Following her out to her Charger. He put it down in the trunk of her car, before turning to face her. "Be careful ok?" he said, looking at her face timidly. "I will. Oh, and I'll pick you up this Wednesday. 6.30pm, dress nice." she said, stepping forward. She kissed his cheek and walked away.

Minutes later, she was gone. Dean stood in the middle of the driveway. She was the only girl who'd every sucessfully left him lost for words. She was definately different. He turned and sauntered back into the house, heart a little lighter than it had been in months.

* * *

Two days later, Ryder stood in her bedroom, staring at her reflection in the long mirror. She'd chosen to dress more feminine, afterall she was trying to impress the guy. She'd chosen a silky white off-the-shoulder top, and a tight black pencil skirt that stopped at her knees. Earlier that day she had visited her friend Claire, who had turned her tattered hair, into a beautiful cut. One side was longer than the other, the back was cleaned up. A side-fringe cut in to make her look more girly, as Claire had put it. Her friend was so proud of the cut that she called it, The "Rihanna" do. Ryder laughed at her friends antics.

She'd spent the most part of the afternoon getting herself ready. It wouldn't have taken so long if she did things like this more often. She'd straightened her hair, sick of her usual waves. After she'd done her make up, she hardly recognised herself in the mirror. "Oh, god. What am I doin'?" she asked herself. Looking over herself again. She threw herself down on her bed, she sat there kicking her legs, toes running through the carpet. It was offical, Ryder was nervous. It wasn't even 5.30 yet, and she was nervous as hell. There was a knock at her door, that pulled her from her trance.

She got up, and made her way through her apartment. Stopping, to check the peephole. She smiled when she saw who it was. She opened the door, and greeted her neighbour. "Hello, Mrs Jenkins. How are you today?" she said, warmly. The gentle old woman smiled at her. "I'm fine thanks, sweetheart. Your brother came by while you were out today. He asked me to give you this." She handed Ryder a medium sized brown parcel. "Thank you." Ryder said, blankly staring at the object in her hand. "You look pretty. Are you going on a date tonight?" her neighbour asked. Ryder smiled, and nodded. "That's wonderful sweetheart. Hope you enjoy yourself." she said, turning back into her apartment. "Thanks, again." Ryder said, as she closed her front door.

She ripped open the paper, finding a black box inside. Frowning as she opened it. "Oh my god." she said. Pulling out a silver chain, with a small pendant on it. She had seen pictures of her mother wearing a necklace similar. Her brother couldn't after something like this, but she loved him for doing it. She'd always admired her mother's taste in fashion. She walked back to her bedroom, looking into the mirror, carefully putting on the silver necklace. She smiled as she looked at herself. Suddenly feeling more confident, about how she looked. She looked at the time, she shrugged, decided to leave early.

She stepped into her heels, and grabbed her bag. Breezing through her apartment on her way to the door, she was now excited about the date. She stepped outside her apartment, locking her door. She almost got all the way to her car without seeing Tony. A man who lived down the hall from her, who had made it clear he was inlove with her since she'd moved in 7 months ago. Tony was a handsome man, very polite and always helpful. But she wasn't attracted to him, sure, he had a certain, Chad Michael Murray look about him, but he just wasn't her type. He was just pulling up on his motorbike, when Ryder stepped out of the apartment building.

"Hey Pebbles." he said, still sitting on his bike. Ryder smiled at his nickname. "Hey Tony, what's up?" she said, coming to a stop next to his bike. He removed his helmet, and smiled at her. "Well don't you scrub up nice." he said, looking her up and down. "I was about to say, you look nice in leather." she countered, grabbing hold of his jacket sleeve. "Well, I better let ya go. It's obvious your all prettied up for a reason." he said, leaning forward and swinging his leg off his bike. "Catch ya round, Pebbles." Ryder watched as he walked away.

She walked over to her car, getting in behind the wheel. She gunned the engine, and left the parking lot, singing along to the music, playing through her radio.

* * *

Dean sat in his favourite armchair in Bobby's living room. He'd just finished getting ready, he was now watching television with Sam, trying his best not to let his nerves get to him. He'd spent a little over 20 minutes getting ready, and when he returned downstairs he'd been seriously insecure. Both Bobby and Sam were staring at him. Dean was staring blankly at the screen, not really knowing what was happening on the show. He was worried what he was wearing, wasn't "nice" enough. Looking down over himself again, he sighed.

He was wearing a black shirt, and his black suit jacket, which was normally only used for posing as FBI. He'd bought a new pair of dark blue jeans, that had absolutely no holes in them. He smiled at the thought of owning somehing new. He didn't have any other shoes though, so he'd just cleaned the dirt off of his boots. Looking back up, he saw Sam watching him. "You look fine." Sam said, smiling at his brother. Dean huffed and looked away, "Aww man, this is so not me. I bet she walks in wearin' jeans and a t-shirt or something, and I look like an idiot." Sam chuckled at his brother's self conciousness.

"Dean, I'm sure she's not wearing jeans and a t-shirt." Sam said, trying his best to assure him. Dean looked back at him, his leg bouncing on the floor. "Man, why am I so nervous?" Dean blurted out. Sam laughed at this, "Dude, it's not funny." Dean snapped. "Aw, Dean. Don't be like that." Sam said, sarcastically. "Your probably nervous, cause you actually like this girl. She's not just a piece of ass." Dean nodded, knowing that what Sam had said, was infact the truth. Headlights coming through the curtain caught his attention, nerves definately worse now. His head fell back against the back of the armchair, eyes starring at the ceiling. 'Suck it up kid.' he told himself.

He heard the front door open and heels tapping on the wooden floor of Bobby's hallway. "Guys?" came Ryder's voice. "Yeah, Ry. We're in here." Sam called, smirking at Dean, who'd stuck his finger up at him. The tapping of Ryder's footsteps moved closer, and Dean kept his eyes on the ceiling. They came to a stop in the doorway. "Hey." she said, casually. Dean's eyes fell on Sam, who was obviously staring at Ryder. His mouth was wide open. "Your definately dressed fine." Sam said, looking at him. Dean slowly turned his gaze to the doorway, his mouth twitching into a tiny smile. "You look.. different. But a good different." Dean said, standing slowly.

Ryder blushed, "Yeah, I thought the same thing when I looked in the mirror." She nervously pushed a hair behind her ear, looking over Dean's shoulder at Sam. He was giving her the thumbs up, which made her giggle. Dean turned to look at Sam, who'd quickly turned his attention back to the tv before Dean's eyes had fallen on him. Ryder shook her head, smiling at the brother's. "You two make me laugh." Dean turned back to her, "You hair looks better." She nodded her thanks, and nervously pushed it behind her ear again. "Yeah, my best friend is a hairdresser. This is her latest masterpiece." she said, rolling her eyes.

"You ready?" she asked. Dean nodded, walking over to the doorway where Ryder was standing. "Now behave yourselves you two. Don't do anything I would do." Sam said, acting all parental, laughing as he did so. "There goes all the fun." Dean said, sarcastically. They walked casually out of the door, Ryder walking ahead of Dean. His eyes were going over every part of her. She looked completely different to the way she had looked two days ago. She got into her car, and leaned over to unlock his door for him. He got in, feeling weird sitting shotgun. "So where are we goin'?" he asked. Ryder started her car, shifting into reverse. "That is a secret." she said, as she reversed out of her Uncle's long driveway.

* * *

At 7 o'clock they pulled into the parking lot of a rather large convention centre. Dean looked around noticing all the expensive cars, instantly feeling out of place. Ryder had gotten out of the car, and was waiting for him. He got out slowly, and walked over to her eyes darting around at all of the women, dressed nicely like Ryder. "You dressed fine, trust me." she told him. They walked next to eachother, and jumped on the end of a rather long queue. Dean relaxed a little when he saw the men were wearing jeans too. The line moved quickly and before he knew it they were standing in a large foyer.

"Oh god." Ryder said, suddenly. "What?" Dean asked. "See that blonde girl headed this way?" Dean nodded. "She is the most spoilt child I've ever met. She hates bein' rejected and always picks at my mannerisms." Ryder told him, turning on her heal to face the blonde girl. "Well, if it isn't Ryder Singer. How are you?" came a high pitched voice, the girl puliing Ryder into a bone-breaking hug. "Hey Lauren, I'm just peachy." Ryder said, sounding slightly sarcastic. She pulled out of the hug and took a step back, bumping softly into Dean.

"Well, where are your manners girl? Who's your friend?" Lauren said, eyes dancing over Dean's body. Ryder rolled her eyes, looking up at Dean. "This is Dean. Dean this is Lauren." Dean held out his hand, Lauren took it, and looked up into his eyes. Dean found himself trying to contain a fit of laughter. "Nice to meet you, Dean." Lauren said, trying to sound seductive. Ryder coughed, waving a hand infront of Lauren's face. "Incase ya didn't notice. The guy your tryin' to pick up, is my date. Remember what happened last time ya tried that?" Lauren's eyes snapped away from Dean and onto Ryder. "You are the rudest girl. I swear your step-mother will hear about this." Lauren turned so fast her dress swirled out around her. "Oh like she has any power over me anyway." Ryder called after her.

"What happened last time?" Dean asked, curiously. "I kicked her Merc on my way to my car." Ryder said, with a devious smile. "Shall we?" Ryder asked him. He looked around again, took a breath and nodded. Ryder could tell he was nervous, so she let her hand slide from his elbow to his hand. To her surprise he grabbed it, squeezing it a little the holding a little looser. He was definately worried. They walked to the door, and a young man smiled at them. He looked at Dean and asked, "Surname, sir?" Ryder spoke up, "Singer." The boy's eyes widened. "Sorry, Miss Singer. I didn't recognise you." She smiled softly, and led Dean through the door. "Ryder? Are we in the right place?" Dean asked, eyes darting around the room. "Uh huh. Car show. That was the destination." she answered.

Dean was like a child at Christmas, eyes so wide and full of happiness. He leaned over and kissed her cheek. "Now do you feel comfortable?" she asked, a huge smile on her face. "Uh, I kinda forgot about all the people. I've never been to a carshow." he said, softly. They began their journey around the massive room. To Ryder's surprise, even though Dean had relaxed, his hand still held on to hers. They walked at a slow pace, both taking in every detail of every car, occasionally someone would recognise Ryder, and strike up a conversation. She'd smile, and introduce Dean, the woman would roll there eyes, the men would shake his hand.

Once they had lapped the room twice, Ryder turned to him. "You hungry?" she asked. "Starvin'" he answered. They headed out of the convention centre, back towards Ryder's car. She stopped and threw him the keys. "Wanna drive her?" she asked. Dean nodded, a huge smile on his face. "Where to, Miss?" Dean asked, revving the engine. "To Eric's. Sir." she said, mocking him. "Is that the new place downtown?" Dean asked, chuckling at her. "Yup, resturant for the working class. Cause lord knows I can't afford any more than that." They both laughed as Dean, drove out of the parking lot, a little shakey at first.

* * *

It took them 10 minutes to find a parking space, when they arrived at Eric's. Dean was getting annoyed and Ryder was giggling at his temper. "Calm down hothead. THERE QUICK!" she pointed. Dean sped forward, beating a car that was coming the other way. He cut the engine and looked at her, she was smirking at him. "What?" he asked. She smiled and got out of the car. "Your funny when your frustrated." she said, coming around to meet him at the driver's side. "Oh, thanks." he said, as he slammed the door shut.

Ryder wrapped her right arm, around Dean's left and shook him a little. "Cheer up, handsome." She began walking, dragging him slightly as she moved. Dean caught up with her stride, smiling the whole way to the resturant. They walked through the door, Dean looked around. Feeling a little more comfortable here than he had when he'd gotten out of the car at the convention centre. A short, stuck up looking man, caught Dean's attention. "Name?" he said looking him up and down. "You talk to everyone like that?" Dean asked, cocky grin on his face. The man snapped to attention, "Sorry, sir. Name please?" he said, a little more politely. "Singer." Ryder said, softly.

"TONY!" the small man called. A tall blonde man came from the kitchen. "Yes, sir." his confident voice said. "Show these two to their table." the man said, Tony's blue eyes fell on the couple. "Right this way." He said, walking to a table down the back. Tony pulled a chair out for Ryder, eyes never really leaving her. Dean felt a slight pang of jealousy, but kept it well hidden. "There ya go, Pebbles." Tony said, handing her a menu, turning his attention on Dean, handing him the other. "Um, I'll be back in a few minutes for your order. Would you two like a drink in the meantime?" he asked, politely. Ryder nodded, "Scotch and cola, on the rocks. Thanks." Tony wrote it down, and looked toward Dean. "I'll have the same." Dean said, politely. Tony walked away.

"Pebbles?" Dean asked. Ryder smiled and told Dean about Tony. The jealousy went away, after she'd finished. It was clear that she was just friends with the guy, and he was in the process of getting over her. Tony returned a couple of minutes later, placing the drinks carefully down infront of them. They nodded their thanks, and he walked over to one of his other tables. "He's a really nice guy. It's just, he's not really my kinda guy." Dean raised an eyebrow, suddenly becoming very interested. "So, what is your type?" he asked, putting his menu down. Ryder took a mouthful of her drink, placing it down infront of her. Her eyes down on the table.

"I don't like clingy guys, or guys who spend out on girls. I like him to be like my best friend, lets me have my space, but does sweet things for me. I don't like it when there's too many emotions out there, and I hate jealous guys. He's gotta be able to take care of me, but let me handle myself. Definately gotta have a manly scruffiness about him, but still be handsome. That's what I like in a guy." She looked up at him, finger running around the rim of her glass. Dean nodded, "So basically. Me, that's what your sayin'." Ryder laughed, feeling less embarrassed now. "Exactly." she said, sarcastically.

A few mintues later, they ordered, and their meal came out. They shared a comfortable silence, broken now and then by small conversation. Dean was trying to learn more about Ryder, realising he only knew small things about her, and she knew so much about him. He wasn't disappointed, she answered every question he asked her. "So, after your mother went missing, your dad moved on pretty much straight away?" he asked, slightly taken aback. "Yeah, like for one year he was all "sad". But then he came home one night and said, "kids daddy's gettin' married." I was like 7, I didn't understand, but Jackson was 10. He knew exactly what was going on."

"That's weird." Dean said, lifting his glass to his lips. "It was. I've never called Susan, Mom though. I've never been able to. I can't stand that woman. I'd always thought me and River were close, through the teen years anyway. Boy was I wrong." Dean smiled, remembering the events of last year. "So, do you remember your Mom?" he asked, trying not to sound too curious. "Yeah, some. Like things she did, or things she said. Her smell, the way she smiled." Ryder's eyes met Dean's. "Do you remember your Mom?" she asked. Dean sighed, nodding slow. "A little. I remember her smell, and the way she hugged me. I was alot younger than you. So I got less memories." he said, his voice soft. Ryder saw a change in his eyes, she reached across the table, touching his forearm softly.

"Cherish what you do remember, and always remember your mother loved you." she told him. He smiled at her gesture, he brought his hand over, resting it on hers. "Thanks." he said, "Kinda felt good to talk about her." Ryder smiled, nodding to Tony. "Could we grab the cheque?" she asked him, politely. He turned and walked over to the front desk. "Wanna split it?" she asked. "Sure." They paid for the meal, Ryder said goodnight to Tony. They stepped outside the resturant, the cool night air dancing across their faces. Ryder's hand found Dean's again, they walked slowly to the car. They weren't in any real hurry, tonight was their night off. They were free to be human, and just relax.

Ryder chuckled to herself, looking ahead. "What?" Dean asked, quietly. Ryder shook her head. "I have no idea." They got to her car, and Ryder sat shotgun again. Dean got in behind the steering wheel, turning to face her. Ryder looked at him out of the corner of her eye, "What?" she asked. Dean flicked his head, gesturing for her to come closer, Ryder laughed and slid over. Dean leaned forward, Ryder followed his lead, her hand coming to rest on his cheek. Their lips met in a soft kiss, it got a tiny bit deeper, before Dean broke away. The back of his finger's softly caressing Ryder's cheek. She smiled at him and slid back over to her side, Dean chuckled and started the car.


	2. Chapter 2

Twenty minutes, they arrive at Ryder's apartment building. In a poor attempt to be quiet they used the stairs instead of the elevator. They continue talking and laughing, but several flights of stairs later, the mood had changed. Dean had found himself, watching her every move. The way her lips moved when she talked, the way her hair fell against her tanned cheek. Ryder had stopped at the top of the stairs, looking down at him. "This is my floor." she whispered, leaning against the door. As he stepped closer, she pushed the door open, making him stumble forward a little. She giggled, and pressed her finger against her lip. She was now walking backwards, eyes never leaving him.

Dean reached forward and grabbed her wrist, gently pulling her towards him. He let her wrist go, putting his hand gently on her lower back, pulling her a little closer to him. He looked into her eyes, and smiled when he seen a slight pinkness on her cheeks. He leant down and caught her lips with his own, his other hand coming to rest on her hip. It was a gentle kiss at first, but it slowly intensified. Before they knew it, Dean had her pinned against the wall. Her small hand came to rest on his neck, her other arm hanging limply at her side, hand barely clutching her bag. Dean's hand slid slowly from her hip to her thigh, and was now clutching her skirt tight in his clenched fist. She giggled a little, when he swept his tongue across her lip. Just as they'd got right into a full blown tongue dance, a loud bang forced them to jump and break apart. A fit of laughter overcame them when they realised it was only Ryder's bag.

Ryder continued leading the way to her apartment, stopping as she reached the door. She started digging through her bag, searching for her keys. A soft jingling made it's way to her ears, she looked up to see Dean dangling her keys infront of her. He'd had them since they'd arrived. She took them from him, but as she did so, he caught her lips again. He had her pinned between him and the door, both her arms wrapped around his neck. "Hmm Hmm.." Ryder stepped out from underneath Dean's body. "Hi Mrs. Jenkins. Sorry did we wake you?" Ryder asked, cheeks starting to go pink again. Dean turned to see a gentle old lady standing in the doorway across from Ryder's. "No, I was up watching television. I just heard a bang, and came to check that you were ok." the small lady said, eyeing Dean carefully.

"Oh, no I'm fine. I just dropped my bag." Ryder said, shaking her bag infront of her. "Ok sweetheart. Can I talk to you, privately?" Mrs. Jenkins asked. Ryder nodded, turning and unlocking her door for Dean. 'Sorry.' she mouthed. Dean kissed her cheek and walked into the apartment, closing the door behind him. Ryder stepped across the hallway, stopping just infront her caring neighbour. "Sweetheart, be careful. Boys like that lead to heartbreak," she said, a mother like tone in her voice. "Or STD's." Ryder's cheeks were now a bright scarlett colour. "Thanks for the advice Mr. Jenkins. Do you want anything from the store tomorrow?" Ryder asked, in an attempt to change the subject. "Just the usual, sweetheart." Ryder nodded and turned opening her door. "Oh and honey. Please use a condom." With that being said, the old lady clicked her door shut. Ryder banged her head on her front door, sighing loudly.

"She do that very often?" Dean asked. He'd been sitting on the chair she had next to her front door, and heard the whole thing. Ryder nodded, "Since I got outta hospital, she's been watching over me. She used come in and clean for me when I first got out." she said, throwing her bag down on her coffee table, and heading into the kitchen. "So now, I do the same for her. I get her groceries when I go into town. Walk her dog occassionally. She a lovely woman. Just has a case of Bad Timing." Dean laughed, looking around Ryder's home. "Nice place." Ryder walked out of her kitchen, two beers in hand. "Thanks." she said. Dean took one, and looked at some of her pictures. Ryder dropped onto her large couch and kicked off her heels, pulling her legs up onto the couch. "Is that your Mom?" he asked, pointing to a photo on her fireplace. "Uh huh, yeah. She was gorgeous." Ryder answered, watching him.

He turned to look at her, "You look just like her." She smiled her thanks. Dean took a swig of his beer, crossing the small space to sit on the couch. "Might as well make yourself comfortable. I don't see you walking back to Bobby's." Ryder said, laughing. Dean agreed. He kicked his boots off, and removed his jacket. He sat back into the couch, and turned to face her. Ryder stared at him for a second, and stood, throwing a couple of pieces of wood into the fire, making the flames warmer. She turned on the her stereo, and sat back down. This time closer to Dean. "You like Metallica?" he asked, a keen smile on his face. "Shoo, I LOVE Metallica." Ryder stated proudly. 'Marry this woman' he thought to himself.

Dean put his beer down, and put his arm along the back couch behind Ryder. "So, uh, where were we?" he asked, casually. "I think I was about here." Ryder said, leaning forward, her small nose touching his cheek softly, her lips less than an inch away from his. "I think I was here." Dean said lips touching her breifly before moving back a little. "Yeah, that sounds about right." He smiled and kissed her, this time the kiss was hard. Full of heat, the same heat they'd felt out in the hallway. Before they knew it, they were laying down. Dean hovering over Ryder, his hand touching the warm skin of her thigh. Ryder looked towards the heater, breaking the kiss. Dean brushed his lips softly over her jaw. "Do you, uh, wanna.. you know?" she asked, shyly.

Dean put his weight on his forearms, looking at her. He didn't really need to be asked, but he didn't want to seem sex crazed. "Only if that's what you want. I don't like the idea of your uncle's favourite gun bein' pointed at my head." He loved it when she laughed, which is what she did when he'd said that. She slowly pulled herself up leaning her back against the arm of the couch. "I want to." she said, softly. "Alright, and don't worry you wont get in trouble with Mrs Jenkins. I always keep a condom in my wallet." he drawled. She hit his shoulder softly. They were both giggling as they kissed again. The song finished on the stereo and the soft hum of "Nothing Else Matters" started playing.

Ryder's hands found their way to the buttons on Dean's shirt. One by one she undid them, kissing him slowly, tongue softly rubbing his. Once it was completely undone, she pushed it off his shoulder, her hands sliding down his chest. Dean knelt up letting the shirt slide off his arms, Ryder sat up eyes locked on his. She pulled her own top off, smiling as Dean's eyes fell on her body. It was obvious they were both sick of waiting, both removing the rest of their clothes themselves. Before long, they were back on the couch, Dean hovering over Ryder again. Her right leg over the back of his left, his right hand tangled in the back of her short hair, his left holding onto her left thigh. Ryder's hands sliding up and down his back, pressure growing harder with every thrust.

Dean was grunting softly in her ear, as his lips lightly pecked at her neck. A soft moan left her lips, as he pushed into her again. A soft chuckled echoed in her ear, she turned her head finding a pair of green eyes looking at her. She smiled, her right hand coming to rest on the back of his head. "What?" she asked, her voice soft. Dean shook his head, "You said I'd have to wait til our date to see your boobs." he said, laughing. "Yeah?" she said slightly confused. "You said it sarcastically." Ryder laughed with him this time. Dean kissed her again, this time much softer than before, he pushed against her with the same softness, causing her to moan into the kiss. Dean smiled against her. Ryder's mind went blank, and she got lost in the moment with Dean, never experiencing anything like this before. The went that way for hours, well into the early hours of the morning.

* * *

It was raining, Dean knew that before he even opened his eyes, he could hear the soft pattering of the rain on the roof. There was no warmth coming in the bedroom window. The only warmth came from the body next to him. The soft naked body, pressed up against his. He opened his eyes, and looked out of the window, the sun was hidden by dark rain clouds, the sky was as grey as grey could be. He turned his head, catching a glimpse of the beautiful woman next to him. She was laying on her stomach, her head resting on the edge of his pillow, an arm resting lazily across his chest, her left leg over his. Bedsheets were down around their waists, showing off her naked back.

His left arm was around her, his hand resting gently on her head. He felt her shift closer, her head coming to rest on his shoulder. Unconsciously, he leaned down, and kissed her forehead softly. He closed his eyes again, intending on going back to sleep, when he felt a small hand flick on the tip of his nose. He opened one eye and looked down. "What was that for?" he whispered. Ryder's now open eyes, were smiling up at him. "Just felt like it." she whispered back. She moved back over to her side of the bed, laying on her side, facing him. Dean rolled onto his side, and looked at her. He chuckled softly, "You have sex hair." Ryder shuffled a little closer, a hand coming up to his hair. "You do too." she said, chuckling as well.

He pulled the sheet up, covering their naked torsos, his hand sliding around to her back. She closed her eyes at his touch, head resting softly against his chin. His hand rubbed up and down her back in small circles, through the bed covers. Her hand came to rest on his chest, his heart beating evenly against her hand. He knew what she was doing, she didn't need to say a word. She was making sure that he was infact alive, adding the memory to her other's to keep close after he'd gone. "It's a scary thought, isn't it?" he whispered to her. He felt her nod softly. He'd often stayed up at night, just thinking that one day, he wasn't going to wake up. He wouldn't ever feel his heart beating in his chest. Ever see his brother again. Never see anyone again. But it that moment, nothing like that mattered to him. All that mattered was Ryder.

_BANG..BANG..BANG_ Ryder groaned at the sound. "You think if I ignore them they'll go away?" she asked, lazily. _BANG..BANG..BANG..BANG!!_ "Uh, no I don't think so." Dean said, laughing. Ryder got up, walking to her bedroom door. Grabbing her bathrobe from behind it, pulling it on and tying it up as she walked down the hall, she stopped and threw Dean's jeans in the door. "Thanks!" he called after her. He stood, pulling them on. He walked out into the hall just as Ryder opened the door. He decided to hang back, incase it was Bobby.

* * *

"Mornin' Pebbles." Tony stated, alot more forced than usual. "Hey, Tony. What are you doin' here so early?" Ryder asked, looking up into his blue eyes. "Can't I visited my favourite neigbour?" he asked, looking to the left. Ryder frowned, she had a bad feeling about this. She was glad she'd left the chain on. She leaned to the left, opening the draw of the small stand next to her door, pulling out a gun. She hid it behind her back, quietly clicking off the safety. "Nothin' wrong with that. Just it's odd at 9 o'clock in the morning." She answered. He was still looking to the left. Something was definately up.

"Uh, your friend wanted me to bring him to your apartment." Tony said, eyes snapping back to her. Ryder frowned deeper, "Which friend?" she asked, quizzically. "The guy you were with last night." Footsteps came from behind her. Looking over her shoulder she saw Dean looking at her. "Oh no." she whispered. She turned back to the door, she threw her weight against it. A powerful shove came from the otherside, an arm coming in through the open door. "Hey baby, you miss me?" he snarled. Ryder's eyes opened wide, darting over to Dean. He was already on his way.

He grabbed the arm, pulling it towards him. There was a bang, the sound of a body hitting the door. The arm let go, and Dean's hand grabbed the front of Ryder's robe, pulling her behind him. The door was then kicked in by a powerful kick. Dean came face to face with himself. "Aww you cheatin' on me now sweetcheeks." came the same cruel snarl. Ryder whimpered. Dean knew what it was. Tony was standing glued to the spot, looking from Dean to the other Dean. "What the fudge is goin' on?" he screamed.

Dean's attention turned to Tony. This was the shifter's chance, he threw a heavy punch that landed on the side of Dean's head. He then pushed Dean out of the way, falling into an unconcious heap on the floor. "Now, we have a little something we need to finish." Ryder stepped back, but the shifter stepped forward grabbing her hair, pulling her to him. "Let go of me!" she yelled. "Now why would you want me to do that?" he said, sounding a little more Dean-like. She knew she wouldn't get out of this verbal. She pulled the gun from the tie at the back of her robe. Smashing it down hard on the back of it's head.

He let go, pushing her to the ground. "YOU f***in' b*tch!" he screamed, the same scary tone it had used last time. She'd lost the gun when he'd pushed her, now resting on the floor infront of Dean. She swung her legs around infront on her, and kicked the shifter's legs out from under him. He fell to the floor, a loud BANG came from his head hitting the ground. "f***in' b*tch." it whispered, pouncing on her. Hands grabbing her throat pinning her on the ground. She couldn't breathe, so she relied on her training. She punched it in the ribs, it screamed out in pain, hands loosening on her throat.

She turned her head, and stretched out her arm, trying to grab the gun finger's falling two inches to short. The shifter pulled his arm back, punching her in the mouth. Ryder laughed at it. "WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHIN' AT?" it growled. She turned her head back to it, eyes full of anger. Her elbow crashed into it's jaw, it collapsed onto her. She wrapped her legs around it's waist and flipped over, straddling it. Quickly, leaning over and grabbing the gun. Pointing it at the shifter's throat. It immediately stopped moving. "Would you really kill something with your precious Dean's face?" it teased. Ryder's eyes fell on Dean, she pushed the gun down harder. "You couldn't kill me last time? What makes you think you could do it this time?" the shifter taunted, green eyes full of hatred.

It started laughing at her, trying to throw her off guard. She stood slowly, staring into those cold eyes. She looked away, and pulled the trigger. She didn't look at it, she knew it was dead. A silver bullet had gone through it's forehead. She shot another shot into it's chest, just to make sure. She dropped the gun, and turned to Tony. Eyes full of tears. He stepped inside, and closed the door. He knew Mrs Jenkins would be on her way to the door. "What was that thing?" he asked, hands falling onto Ryder's shoulders. "Shapeshifter." came Ryder's hoarse voice. "Your bleeding." Tony said, looking over her shoulder at the creature.

Ryder walked over to Dean, falling to her knees infront of him. Hand falling on his neck, searching for a pulse. She sighed a breathe of relief, when she felt the steady beating under fingers. She slapped his cheek softly, calling for him to wake up. "Come on Dean, open your eyes you stubborn ass." she said. He groaned, eyes fluttering open, the side of his head was throbbing. He sat up slowly, Ryder's hands on his bare back. "Aww looks like I missed the party." Dean said, eyes falling on the shifter's dead body. He turned, looking into her tear filled eyes. He pulled her into his lap, hugging her tightly. "You okay man?" he asked Tony. "Yeah." he answered. Dean held Ryder tight, kissing the side of her. "It's okay. Everyone's okay."

* * *

FIVE MONTHS LATER..

Sam sat at a table with Dean in the back of a rather wild, dirty club. Sam could see Dean's jaw clicking from across the table. Eyes glued on Ryder, who was pretending to be interested in a lead on their latest hunt. Jackson staggered back to the table, three bottles of beer in hand. Dean's eyes shifted to Jackson, grabbing a beer from him, tipping the neck of his bottle in Ryder's direction. "Why does she have to be so good at that?" he asked Jackson. Sam stifled a laugh. "'Cause she's female." was Jackson's drunken answer. Dean sniffed, taking a swig of his beer. Dean and Ryder had been dating for five months now, this was the first time they'd seen eachother since a hunt in Denver, three weeks earlier.

Jackson had pointed out the guy, who'd witnessed one of the attacks. Ryder had offered to go get the information from him. Putting on her best dumb act, she played him right into her hands, with an innocent smile, and fake stupidity. The guy probably thought he was gonna score. Sam was amused by his brother's change in character, finding it hilarious that he was jealous. Never having actually witnessed Dean in a steady relationship, the past five months had been fun for Sam. "OH! You must have been so scared?" came Ryder's ditzy tone. Sam was seeing more of Ryder's actually disgust in the guy than Dean had, who was too busy watching th closeness off the two. Sam chuckled when Ryder caught his eye, pointing a finger down her mouth, rolling her eyes at the guy. He turned to her, and her face fell into that innocent smile again. Dean had looked up right then.

"Man, this blows." Dean said, throwing a bottle cap at Jackson's passed out head. Smirking when the man lazily threw his arm about. "Dude, you should be happy that she's with you. That guys gonna be cut up when he sees her leavin' with you." Sam said, laughing at the lost look on Dean's face. His brother huffed, looking over at Ryder, who'd been watching him, getting bored with the guys story. She smiled when he looked at her. "See man, she's not enjoyin' it." Dean leaned his elbows on the table, never taking his eyes off of her. Green locking with Uniquely coloured eyes, across the filled bar. Sam saw something in Dean he'd never seen directed at anyone else before. His brother loved her, not a family type love. Dean was inlove. Which made Sam happy, his brother deserved this. It was just too bad that it had happened in his last year on earth.

"I think you should go save her." Sam hinted. Ryder had grown distracted, and was now looking longingly at the couple dancing to the live band. Dean smiled, "Not if she wants me to do that." Sam chuckled at his brother's words. "You should give that a try, it's different if your dating the girl. If you can't dance, she wont laugh and walk away on you. She'll think it's dorky and kiss you." Sam said, thinking of Jessica. Dean's hand came to rest on Sam's shoulder. "I better get her, she's starting to look depressed. Be back when she lets me get off the dancefloor." Dean said, as he walked away.

Sam watched as his older brother approached the bar, pretending to buy Ryder a drink for the first time. She turned and smiled at him, eyes glued on his face. They made small talk, over their drinks, the man Ryder had been talking to had left. What Sam saw next made a huge smile cross his face. "I'll be damned." he said to himself. Dean was leading Ryder to the middle of the floor, Ryder was looking at him strange. Then the song started, and it all made sense. Dean had asked the band to play Ryder's favourite song, Layla by Eric Clapton. He pulled her close and moved slowly with his head resting on hers. Sam sung along to the song quietly, this being the only of Dean's music he actually liked. 'Layla..got me on my knees..Layla..got me begging darlin' please..Layla'.

"Sam?" a female voice asked. Sam's back stiffened and he looked over his shoulder. His smile fell from his lips when he seen who was standing there. "Cassie?" She walked up and sat where Dean had been only minutes before. "What are you doin' here?" Sam asked, eyes darting to Dean, who was lost in a play fight with Ryder over the other side of the bar. "I'm here with some friends, we're on a roadtrip." she answered smiling. "Where's Dean?" she asked, looking around. "He's.. around." Sam answered. Cassie rose an eyebrow, eyeing Sam. "What's going on?" she said, angrily. "Did you have any hopes of makin' up with him?" Sam asked, seriously. "Uh, why?" she questioned. Sam nodded his head over to the bar, where Dean was laughing and talking with Ryder.

Cassie's shoulders slumped. "He's still a hornbag?" she questioned, eyes fixed on the two. "Nope, that's five months of datin'." Sam told her. "He's happy?" she asked, turning to face him. Sam nodded, "Yeah, he's pretty content right now." Cassie sighed, "When we were dating I don't remember him smiling like that." she told Sam. "That's because he was keeping a secret from you. Ryder knows everything, and has accepted it, 'cause she's like us." Cassie turned back to where Dean was, her posture had changed again, she'd just witness him kiss Ryder. "Look. I'm gonna go back to my table. I might come back when Dean's here." She stood, and walked slowly back to her friends, who all seemed to be comforting her, and giving Ryder the evil eye.

'Great' Sam thought. Dean and Ryder made their way back through the crowd, hands with drinks in them. Ryder sat between Sam and Dean, handing Sam a drink and winked. "Ugh. Did he pass out?" she asked, poking her brother's head. Sam laughed, "Yep." Ryder shook her head, leaning over to look at her brother's face. "It's ok, his breathing." The three of them laughed, Dean taking a swig of his scotch. "He's done that everytime I've been to a bar with him." Dean said, flicking another bottlecap at Jackson's sleeping form. "Be happy he hasn't thrown up on you." Ryder said, taking a sip of her drink. Dean looked at Sam and laughed, Ryder looked at Sam sympathetically. She hugged him, "You poor child. Did you need therapy?" she asked, hands framing Sam's face.

"No. But I wasn't the most happy of people." Sam said, throwing a bottlecap at Dean. "Jerk." Dean smirked, sticking up his finger, "b*tch." came the automatic reply. Ryder laughed, bring her glass up to her lips again, eyes falling on a young woman behind Dean. She elbowed him and nodded, he turned and quickly turned back to Sam. "Hello Dean." Cassie said. Ryder's eyebrow flew up, and she was also looking at Sam, who put his hands up. "What?" Dean turned back to Cassie, "Uh, Hi." he said. Ryder watched on, waiting for the girl to acknowledge her presence. "How've you been?" she asked. Ryder shook her head, turning back to Sam. "You know, the usual." Dean said, rather bluntly.

"Ok, is there something I'm missing?" she asked, looking over his shoulder at Ryder, who had her back to her. "Cassie, what do you want from me?" Dean asked, ignoring her question. "Nothing. Dean what's gotten into you?" she asked. "Nothing, Cassie. I just don't really have time to waste anymore." She opened her eyes wide at him. "What's that meant to mean?" she snapped. Dean shook his head. "Exactly that. All you do is pick fights with me. I don't have time for it." he snapped back. Ryder and Sam both turned and looked on. "You had time for it last time. What you dyin' or something?" she yelled. Ryder went to stand, only to be held back by Sam's large hand.

"YES!" he yelled, standing infront of her. "Don't try and bullshit me, Dean. I'm sick of it." She said, pushing him. He shook his head, and turned away. "Don't turn your back on me." Cassie said, pulling him back to face her. Dean huffed, "Cassie, just go. Please I don't want to go through this." She looked up into his eyes, finally seeing the truth in his words. "Your telling the truth aren't you?" Dean nodded, sitting back on his stool. "Cassie, just go back to your friends. Leave me alone." Dean said, turning his back on her.

Ryder's eyes were pinned on Cassie, Dean reached for her hand, but she pulled it away. She didn't want to be calmed down. Cassie was eyeing Ryder with the same distrust. Sam suddenly felt awkward. "Why are you still here Cassie? I said go." Dean asked, looking over his shoulder at her. "At least tell me why?" she asked. Dean sighed loudly, "Do you have to do this infront of my girlfriend?" he asked, turning to face her again. "Yes, Dean I do. YOU left me with the impression that you wanted more from me, then I don't hear from you for a year. I bump into you at a bar, with a girlfriend. Explain that to me." He shook his head. "I didn't leave you with any impression of anything. I told you we wouldn't work." he said, sounding completely parental to Sam.

"But-" Cassie started only to be cut off. Ryder had finally had enough. "Who the hell do you think you are?" Ryder said cutting into Cassie's sentence. "This doesn't concern you." Cassie said, pointing a finger in Ryder's direction. "You point at me again, I'll break your finger. You hear me?" Ryder snapped, "He's told you his bit, now take the hint and go home." Cassie stepped to Ryder. "Empty threats don't scare me." Cassie said through gritted teeth. Dean scrubbed his face and looked at Sam. "Boy are you wrong Cassie?" Sam said. Ryder stood, eyes burning into Cassie, "Good 'cause mine are followed through." Ryder said, a quick hand grabbing Cassie's finger. Neither girl had noticed Dean stand. He came up behind Ryder and wrapped his arms around her shoulder's pulling her away from Cassie. "Please, just go Cassie." he said, turning to cup Ryder's face.

Cassie glared at his back, she turned and went back to her friends. All of whom, were now glaring furiously at Ryder, none game enough to mouth off at her. Sam turned to Ryder and clapped. Dean looked at him a confused look on his face. "Ryder, I will be so proud to call you my sister-in-law one day. Someone needed to teach that girl it's not always her way or the highway." Ryder smiled, and pinched Sam's cheek. "Scared her good, huh?" she said, looking back at Dean. "You two planned that?" Dean said, finally realizing what had just happened. "She was pissing me off. The finger pointin' sent me over. I didn't like the way she was talkin' to you." Dean smiled and hugged her. "She never did listen to me."

* * *

After the little square off with Cassie, the seating arrangements had changed. Ryder was now seated next to her brother, Dean next to Sam. Ryder looked down into her brother's face. "Man, he's drooled all over the table." she said, pulling her arms off the table. Looking up at the two brothers infront of her. "What?" she asked, noting the smiles on both of their faces. "His your brother, he has the same mix in his drool as you do." Sam said, laughing at her face. Ryder shook her head, "Still gross." she said, looking over at the band. Dean looked at Sam, "Did Cassie say anything to you?" he asked, quietly. Sam nodded, and went through the conversation briefly. Dean shook his head.

"She's warped." Dean concluded. "Who is?" Ryder asked, turning back to him. "Cassie." he said, looking over at the other table. "Hey, your the one who boned her. Don't complain to me." came Ryder's smart-aleck reply. Dean gave a sarcastic laugh, "Shut up." Ryder smirked, and brushed her brother's hair out of his face. "Don't." Jackson slurred. "Why not?" Ryder asked, her voice softer than ever. "'Cause I don't want to be seen." Ryder shook her head. Jackson sat up, eyeing eachother them. "You guys tired?" he asked. "Not really." Dean said, laughing at Jackson's confused state. "I sorta am." Sam said, standing. "Me too." said Ryder. Dean smirked at this, "Not that kinda tired." Ryder said, catching the hopeful look on Dean's face.

"Oh, you suck." Dean said, shaking his head at her. "Oh come on, Dean. I'm tired, and there's no way I can get in the mood, after sitting with that Jake dude half the night." Ryder said, seriously. Sam laughed at Dean's face, helping Jackson up off the barstool. "Please. I don't feel well already. Hearing about my sister's sex life really doesn't help." Jackson stated, a dopey smile crossing his face. Ryder and Dean looked at eachother and shrugged. Following their brother's out of the pack bar. Dean took one last at Cassie, who'd been crying, he shook his head. "Dean, you comin'?" He smiled, wrapping his arm around Ryder's shoulders. "With you? Of course." They laughed and walked out into the dark parking lot.

The motel they were staying at was just up the street, so they'd walked to the bar. Ryder giggled at Sam's poor attempt to keep Jackson standing. Dean was alot more quiet than normal, which made her worry. She turned to find a rather distant look on his face. She stopped walking, and stepped infront of him. "Dean, what's wrong?" she asked, her voice barely a whisper. "Nothin'." Dean answered, his eyes falling onto the ground. "Is it what she said, about you dyin'?" Ryder asked, searching his face for any sign of emotion. "Can we just drop it?" Dean asked, looking at her. "'Kay." Ryder walked ahead of him, not looking back. She hated it when he clammed shut like this. Especially when he only had another 5 months to go. "Ry. Come here." he called, guiltily.

She stopped, just short of the driveway to the motel. "What?" she asked, looking over her shoulder at him. "Come here." he said, pointing to the ground in front of him. She turned, and stared at him. "Why?" she asked, hand wiping her cheek. "'Cause I want to hump your leg. What do you think?" Dean said, smiling. "Well why didn't you say so?" Ryder said, as she walked back to him. Dean put an arm out and pulled her into him. "You go alright." he told her, and she smiled. "You go alright, too." That was Dean's way of saying he cared for her, without putting himself out there to get hurt. She smiled and cuddled him a little tighter. 'Why does he have to go?' she thought, a small tear fell from her left eye, falling upon brown leather.

* * *

Jackson was up at the crack of dawn, all contents of his stomach now halfway to the sewers. He sat on the cold bathroom floor, back against the bathtub. He pushed his long hair back out of his face, scrubbing his stubble filled chin. He sighed thinking about how many times he's woken up this way. Pulling himself up to his feet, he stripped out of his clothes and jumped into the shower. He leant forward, hands pressed hard against the wall, wet hair falling over his face. He tilted his head back, water falling across his face. 'JACKSON!!' he whipped his head around, there was no-one there. 'JACKSON!!!'..

-Flashback-

It was a hot and humid night in the summer of 1995, and Jackson had dragged Ryder to a party at his friends house. Upon arriving, he did his usual thing. He did a lap of the party, losing his sister amoungst the mass of people. He then went on to grab a drink, and a girl. Disappear for a little bit, then return after a hit of Coke. He followed a pretty blonde girl out into the living room, finding Ryder in her usual spot near the kitchen. As usual she looked miserable, but Jackson was too drunk to care.

Twenty minutes later, his friend's dad came home. The party died, and Jackson had no idea where Ryder was. "Man, she probably cracked it and went home." Rick said. Jackson shook his head, flicking the switch on the stereo. "JACKSON!!" His head flicked around, looking up the stairs. He took off so fast Rick couldn't even catch him to him. "RYDER?" he called. A terrified scream came from the guest room. Jackson ran and threw himself into it. "JACKSON!" Ryder called again.

What Jackson seen when he'd entered the room broke his heart. His baby sister, his 15 year old baby sister, was beaten, in tears and being ravaged by some guy he'd never met before. The guy pushed off the bed, and stepped to Jackson. Ryder curled into a ball at the head of the bed, torn clothes a sign of what had happened. Rick entered the room, and took off his jacket, slipping past the two boys standing off at the end of the bed. "Hey kiddo, come on. It's okay, I wont let nothin' hurt you." Ryder crawled across the bed, and into the open jacket infront of her. Rick directed her out of the room, and into his parents bathroom.

"What?" the guy said. Jackson looked him up and down. Eyes full of anger, and hatred. "You know who that was?" he asked in a calm tone. "Your girlfriend?" the guy said laughing. Jackson chuckled and looked away. The guy relaxed, turning to grab his jacket. Jackson's fist swung around, hitting the guy square in the jaw. "Wrong answer. That girl," Jackson yelled, finger pointing in the direction of the other room. "is my baby sister. You asshole. So don't play cute with me!" He pulled him by the hair dragging him out of the room and down the stairs. He threw him down thr front stairs, and onto the hot concrete. His arm repeatedly swinging back and smashing into his face. Until to adult arms pulled him away. "Get inside." The parental voice told him.

Jackson nodded. Turning quickly and storming back into the house. He ran up the stairs two at a time, and bolted to the bathroom. He stopped at the door, and listened. Ryder was sobbing, and hissing. Rick was attempting to clean her cuts, and attempting to comfort the young girl. Jackson pushed the door open, the sight brought tears to his eyes. Ryder was sitting on the lid of the toilet, looking away from Rick who was wiping a cut on her neck with a wet cloth. Her hair was a mess, and what was left of her clothes was barely covering her. Jackson's tears were rolling uncontrollabley down his cheeks, and in two quick strides he was infront of her. He squatted down and pulled her into a tight hug. Which to his surprise was returned instantly.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I dragged you here." he whispered, holding his 15 year old sister so close that he could feel every tremor of her badly shaken body. Her small hands were clenched on his t-shirt, head buried in his neck. "It's not your fault." she whispered, between sobs. "I shoulda been watchin' you. I'm sorry."

-End Flashback-

Jackson stood infront of the bathroom mirror staring into his face. A face that he'd never let anyone see since that night, because he didn't want them to see the constant guilt in his eyes. Ryder had been so different those holidays, so quiet and self-conscious. He'd spent every day of every week they had off with her, trying to cheer her up. But her happiness never took the guilt away, he still blamed himself for what happened that night. He stepped out of the bathroom, looking around the room. Sam was sprawled out over his queen size bed, arms and legs hanging out. Ryder was asleep in the bed she'd been sharing with Dean, he looked around confused.

He pulled on a jacket and stepped out of the motel room, and into the cold morning air. Dean was right where he'd expected him to be. He was sitting up on the trunk of the Impala, his back resting against the glass of the rear window. "I woke you huh?" Jackson said, leaning against the side of the car. "Kinda, yeah." Dean said, turning to look at Jackson. "So that's what you look like under all that hair." Jackson gave a slight chuckle as Dean sat up, resting his forearms on his knees. "Yup." Jackson looked closer at Dean's face, the guy was tired, and his eyes were bloodshot, Dean Winchester had been crying.

"Oh, man. I seriously can't handle this sh*t." Dean said, shaking his head. Turning his gaze to Jackson. "Their tryin' their hardest man. They wanna save you. There's just no answers." Jackson said, his voice hoarse from the vomitting. Dean nodded, and looked over his shoulder to the motelroom door. "Every time she smiles it kills me. 'Cause I know in five months, I'm not gonna see that again. Everytime I muck around with Sam, it's fun at first. Then I get all, like this. I just don't know what I'm supposed to do." Jackson sat up on the trunk next to Dean, following his gaze to the sunrise infront of them. Jackson put a firm hand on Dean's shoulder, shaking him softly.

"You're supposed to enjoy your time with them. Make all the memories you can with them. They need you right now, just as much as you need them. Hell man, even I need you. Your the only one who can knock any sense into me." Jackson said, sounding completely grown up. Dean looked at him side-on. "Ryder could give me a run for my money." Dean said, laughing. "Yeah, but I can hit you back." Jackson said, smiling back at the man infront of him. "Uh, Dean. I need your help with somethin'." he continued, Dean's head turned completely, eyebrows raised. "Uh, okay." Dean answered.

* * *

Ryder woke up to the smell of a fresh hot chocolate under her nose, and the goofy grin of her big brother. "Mornin'." he drawled, as Ryder sat up, taking the foam cup from his hand. "Morning." she said, as she kicked off the bedsheets, and crossed her legs. "Ugh. I miss my own bed." she said, absently. Jackson laid across the bed infront of her, smiling whole-heartedly for once. "Guess what?" he said, turning his head in her direction. "You finally had a shower?" Ryder said, smirking. "Well, yeah but no. I've given up the booze." he said, voice fully serious. Ryder looked down at her brother, then over at Dean, who nodded. Ryder placed her cup down on the beside table, throwing her small body onto her brother's. "THAT'S GREAT!" she screamed, hugging her brother tightly.

"Uh, sis. I can't breathe." came Jackson's muffled voice. Ryder let go and sat back up, running her hands threw her hair. "Sorry." she said, as he sat up. "Naw, I should be sorry. For twelve years you been takin' care of me. That's twelve years too long. It's time I acted like the oldest." Jackson said, messing her hair as he stood. "Now get ready. We leave in 15 minutes." Jackson sat next to Dean at the small table on the other side of the room. Sam was on couch, sorting through the information, making sure they were headed in the right direction. Ryder stood and dragged her duffle into the bathroom, locking the door behind her.

After pulling on her favourite pair of jeans, an acid wash pair she'd had since she was 18, and a white long sleeved t-shirt, Ryder found herself lost in thought. She had her brother back, not just Jackson. The OLD Jackson, the one who took care of her, before him, the one who spent all his time raising her. A part of her was relieved, another sad. She was gaining something, but in five months she was losing something else. Someone who now meant more to her than anything. She shook her head, shaking those thoughts from her mind. "Suck it up." she told herself. Turning and leaving the bathroom completely ready.

She dropped the duffle next to the bed she'd just gotten out of. She'd just switched into hunt mode, all movements were precise and trained. She picked up her gun, she slammed the magazine into the handle, and double-checked the safety. She pushed the gun into the back of her jeans, pulling her shirt over it. She picked up her black leather jacket, shurgging her shoulders until it laid comfortably against her. She turned to the boys, and frowned. "What?" she asked, bluntly. "You will never cease to amaze me." Sam said, shaking his head from his position on the couch. She sat on her bed pulling on her boots.

"So, who's team am I on?" she asked, looking up from pushing her foot into her boot. "Your with me." Sam said, coming to sit next to her. "We get the house. Go team." he said, sarcastically. "Man, you and Jackson always get the outside stuff." Ryder called over to Dean. "That's cause we're older." he called back, a cheeky grin on his face. Ryder shook her head at him. "I'm dating a child." she said to Sam. "What can I say other than I've been putting up with it for 24 years." he countered. "Ah, Tuche." Ryder said, throwing a bag over her shoulder.

"Come on Sammy. We're ridin' in the real car." Ryder said, poking her tongue out at Dean. "What 'cause it's stickshift?" Dean said, his face wrinkled in annoyance. "Yup. A real car." she said, leaning up to kiss him on the cheek. Dean grabbed her arm, pulling her back to him. "Be careful okay. Don't let anything happen to either of you." Ryder nodded, "Always." He kissed her temple and let her go. Within minutes, both cars were on the road, Dean's Impala leading Ryder's Charger.

* * *

Pulling up outside the abandoned old farm, Ryder got out of the car and looked across the roof at Sam. "What a shithole." she said. Sam nodded, "At the risk of sounding completely Dean-like. This place sucks out loud." Ryder chuckled, looking at Sam through her favourite sunglasses. A pair of Aviaters that had belonged to her mother. She pulled them off, and put them on the dashboard, slamming the door. "Shall we?" she asked. Sam nodded.

Cautiously, they made their way up to the old house. Once they were close enough they ran, throwing themselves against the chipped wood of the old house. Almost in synch, Ryder and Sam pulled out their guns, turning to look at eachother. "I'll go in the front, you go -" Ryder held up her hand. "Sorry buddy. No can do. You go where I go. Dean's rules." she said, eyeing Sam. Almost daring him to argue with her. He huffed and followed Ryder around to the back of the old house. They heard a sickening laugh, and the sound of a girl crying, as soon as they reached the door. Sam looked in staying well hidden. "They got someone." Ryder cursed under her breath. "First I gotta waste my time on this thing. Now I gotta play search and rescue too. This is frickin' great." she said, through gritted teeth.

They sorted out their plan, they'd worked out there was only two demons in the house, and a human "hostage". Sam would sneak upstairs and get that one, while Ryder got the one downstairs and saved the girl. They opened the door quietly and went their separate ways. Ryder snuck along the wall, gun drawn, listening to the footsteps of the demon. "What do you want from me?" the girl sobbed. Ryder stopped and listened. "Your blood." the demon said casually. Ryder leaned up to the doorframe, eyes peering around the corner. The demon wasn't too big, she'd take him alright, she figured. Her eyes fell on the girl and she looked away. "Dammit." she muttered. She stepped into the doorway and leaned against it. "Hey buddy." the demon turned, eyes falling on her face. "RYDER!" the girl called. "Wanna party with a real woman?" Ryder said, voice sounding almost seductive.

The demon walked up to her, eyes caught on hers. She let a devious smile cross her lips, and lifted her right leg, kicking the guy square in the abdomin. He flew across the room, and slammed into the dinner table breaking it. "I always did love watching the wrestling as a kid." she said, getting ready for the man's attack. The guy ran at her, throwing his leg at her, in a failed attempt at a Roundhouse kick, Ryder blocked it. Throwing a punch at his jaw, hearing a definate crunch as she did so. She spun her right foot connecting with the side of his head. She laughed at his pathetic fighting skills. "Boy, you might as well have been a chick." Ryder said, kicking him in the chest. He landed on his back with a thud. "I coulda let ya get a hit in. But I didn't wanna." she said, aiming her gun at his head. "You think you can send me back to hell with a plain bullet.

Ryder smirked. "No. But I can send you to hell with VooDoo bullets, with holywater inside. Don't worry, this wont hurt a bit." She squeezed the trigger, a small silver ball flew from her handgun, and into the guys head. A loud, ear-piercing shriek exploded, and a thick black cloud rushed out of the body, and dissolved into nothing. Ryder shrugged, cracking her neck as she squatted down. "Such a waste." she said, pulling his hood over his face. "You were pretty cute." The whimpering caught her attention and she looked over her shoulder. "Oh yeah. Save the damsel." Ryder said, sarcastically. Walking over to the girl tied to the chair. "Thank you so much." came Cassie's annoying voice. "Oh shove it. I'm only savin' your ass cause it's in the job description." Ryder said, cutting Cassie's hands and feet free. "What's your problem?" Cassie snarled. Ryder stood, and walked away. "You are." she called over her shoulder.

Ryder didn't need to turn to know Cassie was behind her. "What have I done to you?" Ryder laughed, "Nothin'. I just don't like brats." Cassie growled, pushing Ryder, who turned and pinned her to the wall by the throat. "Okay, you mighta got away with yelling and screaming at Dean. But your attitude ain't cuttin' it with me. You wanna get out of here alive, it's my rules. If ya don't like it, I don't care. I'd personally like to leave you here. But Dean would kill me." she let go, letting Cassie catch her breath again. "You think I have a bad attitude. Look at yourself." Ryder balled her hands into tight fists, and sighed. "Difference is, I know I'm a b*tch. Now start walkin' or I'll start hittin'." Cassie walked ahead of Ryder, they slipped out the door, meeting Sam at the car. He'd gotten out okay, but Ryder knew Dean would be furious if he knew she'd let him out of her sight.

"The damsel was you." Sam said, as the two girls approached. "Oh and a handful of a damsel she was." Ryder said, storming to her side of the car. Once all three were in the car, Ryder threw on her sunglasses, and gunned the engine. Sam looked over at Ryder as they drove back into town, Dean and Jackson had left already. Sam had seen them speed off already. "Where's Dean?" Cassie asked from the backseat. "Not here. So shut up." Ryder answered. Sam smirked, turning to face the girl behind him. "He's gonna be angry when he sees you." Sam said, seriously. "Why?" Cassie asked. "Your little stunt at the bar, caused a fight." Sam said, turning away from her. "Oh, but I just wanted the truth." Ryder was biting her cheek, Sam could tell. "Which he told you, but you proceeded to embarrass him." Sam said. "He embarrassed me infront of my friends." Cassie yelled. Ryder slammed down on the brakes, pulling over to the side of the road.

"Ok, you know what. Get out. You can walk back to town." Ryder said, turning to face her. Cassie smiled, "Your kidding, right?" When she seen Ryder's face remain emotionless the smile dripped off her face. "I'm deadly serious. I can't handle your sh*t anymore. Get out." Cassie glared at her. "No." Ryder turned further around. "I ain't your Mommy, I don't need to take care of you. So, I'm gonna say this one more time, nice and slowly. Get.. the .. fudge .. out .. of .. my .. car .. NOW!" Cassie pulled the handle up on the backdoor and stepped out. The door had barely been closed half a second, before Ryder sped away. Sam laughed at the broken look on Cassie's face. He couldn't believe the way Ryder always put her in her place.

"You are so my hero." Sam said, turning to his brother's girlfriend. Ryder chuckled and roughed his hair.

* * *

* * *

"So, you just made her get out, and start walkin'?" Dean asked, a smile plastered on his face. "Yep. Someone had to tell her." Ryder shrugged. Dean laughed and shook his head. "Sir, your order will be ready in 10 minutes. Feel free to take a seat." Dean nodded, and directed Ryder to a booth near the counter. "And the guy didn't get a hit in?" he asked, mouth curling into a grin. "Nope. Poor guy." Ryder said, casually. Dean rested his arm along the back of the booth, Ryder's head fell back against it. She turned to him and chuckled. "Three weeks apart, and the first time we're along together. We're sittin' in a diner waiting for dinner." Dean kissed her cheek, and smiled. "At least it's somethin', right?"

Ryder slid closer, and sighed. "Why did things go wrong for you and Cassie?" she asked, nervously. Dean looked out of the Diner's window, and into the carpark. "She thought I was nuts. Slammed the door in my face. Then begged for my help, when something creepy started happening." Dean said, absently. "She hurt you, huh?" Dean nodded his head. "She did." Ryder followed his eyes, and saw what he was looking at. Two young boys playing at the park across the road, one sitting in the swing, the other pushing him. Ryder's hand was resting on his knee, and she gave him a comforting little squeeze. "I'm guessing if you had the chance to do anything before it comes. It would be to relive your childhood?" Ryder asked.

Dean shook his head. "No. Well, I'd have liked it to be a little different, but if it was things would be different with me and Sam. Our childhood is why we are like we are now. If I had the chance to do anything before I died, it would be to have a kid of my own. Just so I wouldn't be forgotten after I was gone." Ryder looked at him, puzzled expression on her face. "We'll never forget you." she said, quietly. "I know that, but after my Dad died, people called us John Winchester's boys. It felt kind of honorable, you know? I thought one day, people would be sayin' see that boy there. That's Dean Winchester's boy." He shook his head, laughing. "Stupid, huh?" Ryder shook her head. "No. It's sweet, but what if it was a girl?" she asked, frowning.

"Then people would be gettin' haunted. 'Cause most of the people who know me are guys. I wouldn't want them pointin' out my daughter." Dean said, voice full of laughter. "Your so stupid." Ryder told him, affectionately. Dean turned back to the counter, and saw the young blonde waitress gesturing for him to come back. He stood, and walked over, leaning against the countertop when he got there. "Here's you order. Sorry it took so long, sir." She passed the plastic bag over the counter, Dean passed over his credit card. Her eyes lingered on his as she took it. She passed him a slip and a pen, he signed and looked up. "Oh, sweetie, you have the wrong idea." He told her, smiling apologectically. She nodded, and handed back his card.

"Have a great night." she said, her voice full of dissapointment. He nodded politely, and held the door open for Ryder. "You still got it, you stud." she said, breezing out of the door infront of him. "Seems that way." he said, chuckling at Ryder's taunt. They got into Ryder's car, she had given him the keys again. He got in behind the wheel, and was about to say something when her cell started to ring. "Ugh. It's my dad." she said, as she hit answer. "Hello..?" she said quietly. Dean could hear the man's voice, it was rather deep, but not yelling. "Yeah, I know." she said, looking out of the passenger side window. "I don't know, Dad. Jackson and me have a few jobs to get out of the way."

She looked at Dean and rolled her eyes. "I know you wanna meet him." She started rubbing her neck, she was getting annoyed. "Look, we'll come up in a couple of months. I gotta few hunts to get out of the way. I'll see what Dean wants do to. But I'll let you know." The man's voice grew softer, more father-like. Ryder's eyes grew softer, as she looked away. "I miss you too, Dad. Bye." She slid her phone shut and sighed. "Your dad wants to meet me?" Dean asked, suddenly. Ryder laughed, "Uh apparently so." she told him. "Ry, I don't know." he said, nervously. "I know."

* * *

THREE MONTHS LATER.

The passed three months had gone by slowly. They'd finished the hunts they had lined up in one single month, with almost no trouble. There was no sign of any demonic activity, they'd begun to lay low, making everyone a little on edge. Sam and Jackson had been staying at Bobby's, both researching for a way to save Dean. Bobby had been grumpier than usual, Dean suspected he was getting ready to let go. Dean had been staying with Ryder in her apartment, he felt he needed to be with her as much as he could, for both of their sakes. He was beginning to sleep less and less, whether he'd be at Ryder's or at Bobby's. Constantly thinking about what laid just ahead of him now.

Tonight was no exception, it was 2.30am and Dean was wide awake. Ryder was curled up next to him, breathing slowly, completely lost to the world. Dean smiled and shuffled closer to her, the soft skin of her arm resting against his naked chest. His hand resting on the soft skin of her back, his face only inches away from her. He took a deep breath, inhaling her scent. She always smelt like Vanilla and something else, something that was uniquely her. He pushed her hair away from her face, eyes falling upon her peaceful face. He wouldn't be lying if he said that he loved this woman, but he just didn't have the courage to actually tell anyone that fact.

Her hair fell off her neck, as his hand came up to softly rub the soft skin there. A small dark patch got his attention, propping himself up on his elbow he leaned in for a better look. The small dark patch was a tattoo, a very new tattoo, judging by the red tinge around the black markings. A gentle finger traced the small tattoo, the initals 'DW'. He heard a soft giggle come from the body next to him. "Like it?" came her soft voice. Dean laid back down, eyes meeting hers. "Yeah. When did you get it?" he asked, a small grin on his face. "When you and Sam were in Kansas last week." she said, with a small yawn.

Dean smirked, "Did it hurt?" Ryder sat up, pulling the sheet over her breasts. "Not too bad, kinda tickled after I got used to it." she said, running a hand through her now shoulder length hair. "You scare me sometimes, when you think pain tickles. I'm beginning to think that you actually like it." he said, pulling himself up against a few pillows. Ryder turned to him, eyes suddenly very different. "Nah, I don't like it, I'm just used to it. But you know what I do like?" she asked, a small devious smile crossing her face. Dean caught on quickly, smirking at her. "What do you like?" he asked seductively, as she crawled up his warm body. She straddled his hips, and ran her hands up his chest. "You." she said, eyes meeting his. Dean chuckled, "Ah, so you just like me?" he said, hands running softly up and down her sides.

She leant down, her lips only half an inch from his. "You can't trick me, Winchester. You just don't wanna be the first to say it." she whispered, warm breath caressing his skin. He chuckled, and pulled her down, lips locking with hers in a long, passionate kiss. He pulled away slowly, eyes looking back up into hers. "Say what first?" he tried. Ryder giggled, shaking her head, "Nice try, D. It's not gonna happen." she said, as she slowly let her head fall into the crook of his neck. Dean sighed, and shuffled his hips. A warmth searing through his body. When a soft moan escaped Ryder's lips, he knew he was where he wanted to be. His right hand slid up her back, coming to rest on her neck, his left slipped down to her hip.

Ryder followed his soft, slow rhythm, occassionally it would speed up a little, causing them both to let a moan slip. Suddenly, Dean couldn't handle the delicatness of it all, flipping Ryder onto her back. He smiled when she giggled at him, he caught her lips again. Seconds later, they had upped the tempo, the bedhead tapping softly against the wall, soft grunting from Dean echoing in Ryder's ear. Ryder's shakey breath on Dean's shoulder. Her hand made it's way to his hair, tickling the nape of his neck affectionately. Ryder moaned loudly, as Dean fell against her after his final thrust, head buried in her neck. She chuckled, "What are you tryin' to do to me?" she asked, her voice sounding exhausted.

"Nothin', just wanted to make you feel special." he said, softly in her ear. "How do you mean?" she asked, as he pushed himself up onto his elbows. "By giving you all of me." he said, eyes looking down into hers. Finally, she could see something in them, that he'd always kept deep down beneath the surface. She smiled as she saw a loving sparkle in Dean's eyes, something she'd only been told he had when he looked at her. "What are you trying to tell me, Dean Winchester?" she asked, cautiously. "That I love you." he whispered back, coyly. She shook her head, "Well, I'll be damned." she whispered. "I love you too."

AN: plz review and let me know what you think, i hope you be come a fan like me :)


	3. Chapter 3

Three days went by almost as slowly as the passed 3 months. Ryder had grown quiet, and was always asleep. She'd wake up through the night in a fit of coughs, with headaches that seemed to only grow more fierce. Ryder didn't seem to be overly worried, just brushed it off saying "It's just a cold. It'll pass." Dean didn't buy it, and grew more worried everyday she stayed ill. He didn't know what could be wrong with her, he just knew this wasn't your average cold, or flu, or bug. He'd watch her while she slept on the couch, listening to the horrible sounds of raspy breathing. "What's wrong with you?" he asked her, as she slept.

It was 3 in the afternoon, and Dean was bored. Ryder had slept all day on the couch, leaving him with nothing to do but watch television. His stomach growled suddenly, so he stood, and made his way to the kitchen. He was leaning on the fridge door, when he heard soft footsteps. "Dean, something's wrong." came Ryder's scratchy voice. 'Gee, you just work that out.' he thought to himself. He looked at her, and he moved quickly over to her. "Geez. Your shakin'." he said, placing his hand on her forehead. "Dean, it hurts." she told him, eyes slowly losing focus. "Okay. No more fightin' me on this. I'm takin' you to the hospital." he stated, with no intention of listening to her.

He grabbed her keys, and helped her into a warm jacket. "You right to walk?" he asked, as he locked the door to her apartment. She didn't speak, she just nodded. Her small hand grabbing hold of the sleeve of his jacket. He lead her to the elevator at the end of the hallway, pulling her into his arms when they got there. Eyes fixed on the light above the doors. The doors opened and Tony was smiling at them. "Ey, Dean. What's up?" he asked, staring at the lost look on Dean's face. "I have no idea." he answered truthfully. Tony stood back into the small space. "I can help you if you like?" he asked, Ryder's breathing finally grabbing his attention. "That would be good. I doubt she's gonna let me go anytime soon."

When they got out to the parking lot, Dean threw Ryder's keys at Tony. "Drive safe, man. She'll kill me if somethin' happens to this car." Tony nodded, and helped Dean place Ryder in the backseat carefully. Once everyone was comfortable, they left. Dean looked down at Ryder, her face was full of confusion. "Hey, you okay?" he asked, mentally kicking himself at his stupid question. "Don't you touch me!" she said, pulling away from him, sliding across to the otherside of the car. "Ryder?" he asked, voice full of worry. "Shut up!" she snapped, eyes closed tight, shivvering. Tony looked into the mirror sharing a worried look with Dean.

Minutes later, they arrive at the doors of the emergency room. Dean got out of his side, walking around and helping Ryder out. She didn't fight him this time, she just let him do what he needed. "I'll go park the car, I'll meet you in the waiting room." Tony called from the car. Dean nodded and helped Ryder into the hospital. "Where's Dean goin'?" Ryder asked, voice scratchier now. "Nowhere, I'm right here." She opened her eyes, and looked up at him, "You let Tony drive my car." she said, absently. Dean shook his head, and kissing her temple. "Excuse me, Miss?" he asked, as he got to the desk. A small friendly woman looked up at him. "Oh lord. What's happened to you?" she asked, eyes darting to Ryder.

"She needs urgent help. Come here sweetheart." the small nurse said, sounding completely maternal. Ryder took her arm, and walked with her. "DOCTOR CARLSON! This girl needs help, right now!" A tall dark haired man, rushed over, taking in Ryder's appearance. "Alright, sweety. Does it hurt anywhere?" he asked, hand resting on her abdomin. Ryder nodded, pointing to her chest. "Ok, take her to X-Ray, but I'm guessing it's Pneumonia." The small nurse helped Ryder into a wheelchair and rushed her away. The doctor approached Dean. "You with that young lady?" he asked. Dean nodded. "How long has she been like that?" he asked, looking concerned. "A couple of days, but she only got real bad today. She kept tellin' me it was a cold." Dean answered. "Okay other than her breathing. Has she been displaying any other symptoms?"

Dean thought for a minute. "Uh, she wakes up through the night in coughing fits. She's had a massive headache for about 3 days. She won't eat, and she was all confused in the car on the way here. Is she gonna be alright?" Dean drawled, pushing his hands into his pockets. The doctor just nodded, "Should be. I'll be send a nurse shortly to let you know what's going on." With that being said, the doctor walked away. Dean took the forms from the nurse behind the counter and threw himself into a seat, in the emptiest part of the room. "Here." Tony said, passing Dean some papers. "Those were in her glove compartment." Dean nodded his thanks, but still didn't move to fill out the forms. "Want me to?" Tony asked, noticing the lost look in Dean's eyes. "Uh, yeah. Thanks."

About an hour later, a small red-haired nurse made her way across the waiting room. Tapping Dean on the shoulder, "Excuse me, Mr Winchester, is it?" she asked, looking down at the forms Tony had filled out earlier. "Uh, yeah." he answered, standing quickly. "Your girlfriend is stable now, the doctor's just running some extra tests. It's seems she's contracted Pneumonia. You can see her soon. Dr. Carlson will come get you when he's done." She smiled up at him, when she saw the lost look in his eyes it dropped. "She's gonna be okay." Dean nodded and sat back down. "Thank you." Tony was asleep in the seat next to him, he'd finished work just as they'd ran into him.

"I hate hospitals." Dean muttered. He leaned back into the seat, frowning when he couldn't get comfortable.

* * *

"Mr Winchester?" a strong male voice said. "Yeah." Dean said, grumpily. After turning his tone changed. "Oh sorry." The doctor chuckled, "It's fine. It can be frustrating in those chairs. I'm sorry for rushing off on you earlier. I'm Doctor Carlson." Dean nodded, putting his hand out. Doctor Carlson shook his head and smiled. "You can see her now if you like. But I'd prefer just one of you go in." he said. Tony stood, "I think I'll head home." He handed Dean the keys, and tapped him on the back. Dean nodded his thanks, and followed the doctor.

"Is it ok if I call you Dean?" Dr Carlson asked. Dean smirked, "I'd prefer it." Walking passed a room with a crying child, the turned a corner and stopped. "Ryder has a rather bad case of Pneumonia. This is not anyone's fault, just some people contract it worse than others. Please try to refrain from waking her, she only just got to sleep." Dean nodded, and thanked the doctor. He quietly opened the door, and closed it with a soft click. The room was dark, except for a dull light just over Ryder's bed. The doctor had explained the lighting was to prevent her headaches from getting worse.

His eyes fell on the figure in the bed. He walked over slowly, and sat on the left hand side of the bed. Pulling a rather comfy looking chair with him. He sat down, and looked over his sleeping girlfriend, a sad smile on his face. The bed was risen so that she was sitting up slightly. Her head turned slightly in his direction. She looked so tired and worn down. Dark rings underneath her eyes, an oxygen mask covering her mouth and nose. There was a drip connected to her right hand, and a small hospital bracelet on her left wrist. Her clothes were folded neatly on the chair next to him, the nurse had changed her into hospital pjs, as he called them. Dean closed his eyes, willing the memories to go away. He didn't want to remember the last time he saw her this way.

-Flashback-

..Beep..Beep..Whoosh..Beep..Beep..Whoosh..

He'd been in the same position for three days, never leaving her side. The girl infront of him was alone, her family in another state. He sighed at sat forward, and examined her. Looking for any sign of change. Her chest rose and fell, with the help of the machine that was connected to her, eyes shut with no even so much as a twitch. Her face so beaten, and scratched he wouldn't have recognised her, if he hadn't seen it happen. No sound coming from her, other than those of the heart-rate monitor and the ventilator that was helping her stay alive.

Three days ago, this girl was kicking his ass in a game of pool. She was laughing at his attempts to put her off, by brushing up against her. She was joking with Sam about movies and books that Dean had never heard of. But not now, now she was just a body, no laughing or joking. She was just lying there, fighting for her life, and it hurt him to see it. If he had of been 10 minutes earlier, he could have prevented this. He could have helped her, stopped her step-sister's boyfriend from beating her so bad. Well, granted the guy was being under some voodoo spell, and was doing what Ryder's step sister asked him too.

..Beep..Beep..Whoosh..Beep..Beep..Whoosh..

"If you wake up, I'll buy you a motorbike?" he told her, brushing his fingers gently across the back of her hand. She didn't respond, he wasn't really expecting her to. He just got sick of sitting in silence. "Well a model one. Cause I can't afford a real one." he said, a hint of laughter in his voice. He looked up at her heart monitor, sighing when it was the same as it had been for days. "You know, I tripped up the gutter when I seen you." he said, smiling, eyes fixed on her face. "You're good at distracting me." He hated the ventilator, remembering the feeling of waking up with that tube halfway down his throat. "I'm sorry." he told her, fingers brushing gently through her hair.

..Beep..Beep..Whoosh..Beep..Beep..Whoosh..

"Don't give up, kiddo." he told her, fiddling with something in his hands. "The world needs more girls like you, so they can make guys like me behave themselves." He leant forward, tying a thin black bracelet around her small wrist. He leant down, and placed his head softly on her shoulder. "It's not safe for you, if I stay here with you." he whispered softly in her ear. "Your gonna hate me when you wake up, and find out I left you here alone." A tear fell down his cheek, he looked to the window, where Sam was watching him. "I'll never forget you for what you've taught me. I'm sorry I couldn't save you." He stood, and kissed her forehead. He stood and walked to the door, stopping to look at her again. Jaw clicking as he fought his emotions. "I'm so sorry."

-End Flashback-

He let his head fall into his hands, trying to push that thought from his mind. He rubbed his tired eyes, and sat back into the chair. His head falling back against the back of the chair. He sat there staring up at the dark ceiling, suddenly feeling tired all of a sudden. He closed his eyes, and crossed his arms over his chest, mind going blank. The smell of bleach and disinfectant didn't seem to bother him now, he was just too tired.

* * *

He woke up an hour later, to find he'd moved. His head was now resting on the bed, his right hand laying softly on Ryder's stomach. He could feel her brushing her hand through his short hair. He opened his eyes and looked at her. Her eyes were closed, but she wasn't sleeping. "Hey." Dean said softly, sitting up. "Hey." she whispered back, her voice muffled by the mask. Her eyes fluttered open, and landed on his face. "How are you feelin'?" he whispered, hand coming up to her forehead. "Peachy." she whispered back. He laughed softly at her, then felt her left hand start playing with his. Eyes staring so deeply into his, that his heart started racing.

"I'm sorry." she croaked, looking away from him. "For what?" he asked. "For not letting you bring me here earlier." Dean shook his head, "Don't be like that." She turned to him, "You were just doin' what you thought was right." he told her, remembering all the times he was really sick, but refused hospitalization. "Sorry I scared you in the car." she whispered, her hand coming up to cup his cheek. "Who did you think I was?" Ryder shook her head, "Okay. Another time?" She nodded. Dean smiled, "You got it."

"Doc says if I follow his rules, I'll be out by next weekend." she said, a small smile on her face. Dean shook his head, "Already with the wanting out of here? Can't you stay put for once." She yawned, her hand falling back onto his. "I don't have time to." she said, squeazing his hand, eyes slowly filling with tears. "Hey, what's wrong?" he asked, a frown on his handsome face. She looked away from him again, emotions finally getting the better of her. "I thought I could handle this. I did, but I can't. Dean, it's killing me, knowing I only have two months left with you." she was sobbing now.

He sat up on the bed next to her, his arms helping her sit up. He pulled her into a tight hug, tears in his own eyes now. "I know. I know." he said, his voice cracking slightly. "But you have to calm down." he told her, his hand rubbing small calming circles down her back. "I'm so scared." she whispered, her hand clamped tightly on his shirt. "I'd be lyin' if I said that I wasn't." he told her, "But I'd rather it be me than you." He laid her back down, and wiped her tears away. "See what you do to me?" he told her, using his shirt to wipe his face.

"You like the hospital pj's?" Dean asked, trying to change the room. She nodded, "Comfortable." she murmurred. She was wearing a white t-shirt, and mostly likely hospital issue pjyama pants. He saw her eyes close, and he stopped talking, just brushed his fingers threw her hair, helping her fall into a deep sleep. "God help me." he told himself. He was completely terrified that Ryder was going to do something stupid. He always had the same nightmare, some nights it would be her, other's it would be Sammy. But whoever it was, would make a deal to trade places with him. He wouldn't allow it to happen, forcing both of them to promise they wouldn't. He kissed her cheek, and sat back in his seat, looking over her.

* * *

* * *

A week later, when he walked into her room. He was surprised at what he saw, she was sitting up properly, with no mask on her face. Her doctor was sitting where Dean always sat, talking to her. "Ah, Dean. How are you today?" the doctor called over. "Fine, thanks." Dean said, yawning. Ryder shook her head, "Your unbelievable. You slept on the couch again, didn't you?" Dean's eyes widened. "How do you do that?" he asked, voice a little higher than normal. "All woman have that. Gets worse as they get older." Dr. Carlson told him. "You should be fine to go home tomorrow afternoon." he said, turning back to Ryder. "Well, I have other patients to check on. So I'll be back later." The docter walked passed Dean, and out the open door.

"Why are you walkin' with your hands behind your back?" Ryder asked, realising the way he was standing. Dean walked over and sat on the very end of her bed. "Don't know what your talkin' about." he drawled, a small smirk on his face. "DEAN!! What are you doing?" she asked, her voice full of excitement. Dean laughed at her. "I'm just sitting here." Ryder looked at him, smiling when she saw his arms move. "Okay, don't hate me for this." he said, pulling a small album from behind his back. "I found this when I was lookin' for somethin' to do. I saw it wasn't finished and didn't look like it was gonna be. So I done it for ya." Ryder pulled it into her lap, a huge smile on her face.

"You don't look like the creative type. Should I be worried?" she asked, looking up at him. He laughed, "Decide for yourself." he said. Ryder flicked through the pages, smiling at the pictures she'd put in herself. Her mouth opened as she flicked through the pages he had done. She stopped on one page, and looked up at him. "I love that picture." she said, turning the album to him and pointing. "Yeah, you and Sammy make a cute couple." Dean joked. Ryder shook her head, "No. He looks happy, like genuinely happy." she said. Dean looked closer and smiled, "He does, huh?" She turned the book back around and flicked. Smiling at a page full of pictures of her and Dean.

He shuffled closer to her, smiling as she looked at every one them. "It's funny how I never realised how many photos there actually were of us." he said, as she closed the book. "I know, thank you." she said, kissing him softly, then turning to put it on her bedside table. "Jackson came by this morning." Ryder said, leaning back into the pillows. "Oh yeah. How is he?" Dean asked. "SAM! STOP SITTING OUTSIDE AND GET IN HERE!" Ryder called, upong realising a tall shadow in the door way. Sam walked in and waved, his cheeks a soft pink. "Gee, embarrass me much?" he said. Ryder chuckled, and gestured for him to come closer.

He leant down, and pulled her into a tight hug. "I came with Dean the other day, but the doc said only one could come in. You were sleeping when it was my turn." he told her. Ryder chuckled, "Sorry. How are you?" Dean was watching all of this, smiling at the look on Ryder's face. She really adored Sam, she thought the world of him. "I'm fine. You look alot better." Sam answered. "Thanks. Jackson said, he's dating someone." Ryder told them both. Sam was sitting cross legged on the bed infront of her, Dean on the chair next to her. "You serious?" Dean asked. Ryder nodded, "Yup. All he told me is that she's blonde, and he's takin' her to Dad's next week."

"Oh yeah. Jackson told me your dad has a huge bit of land out in rural Texas?" Sam asked, excitedly. Ryder nodded, and Dean shook his head. "Yup. Has a pool and a jacuzzi too. Why?" she asked. Sam looked at Dean, who was signalling him to shut up. "Uh, never really been to an overly huge house." Sam answered, sounding a little lost. "No, he's askin' cause I decided I wanted to go with you." Dean answered, frowning at his brother. Ryder's head whipped around. "You wanna come .. with me? You know that means you gotta meet my Dad, right?" Dean nodded, "A small price to pay." Dean said, as she threw her arms around him.

"I can come too, yeah?" Sam asked, shyly. "NO!" Ryder said, sarcastically. "Of course you can."

* * *

Dean had gone back to Ryder's to get some clothes for her to wear home the next day. Sam had decided to stay with Ryder, he'd been in the car all morning, after Dean had picked him up from Bobby's. Sam had grown attached to Ryder the past few months, they both shared a few mutual interests. The most important was Dean. Sure, Sam had met some of Dean's girlfriends, if you could have called them that, but none of them seemed to care for his brother. Dean had the idea that if they didn't care, then they wouldn't ask questions, and if they didn't ask questions they wouldn't get hurt. Ryder openly cared for his brother. Genuinely loved him, and in Sam's books that was everything.

"His not doing to good, huh?" Sam asked, eyes staring at the blank wall. Ryder shook her head, "Naw, he's doin' just as good as anyone in his position." She took Sam's large hand into her little one. "I can't find anything, Ryd. I've looked everywhere." Ryder smiled sadly at him, "I guess, we weren't supposed to find something." Sam nodded his agreement. She squeezed his hand and let go. Sam's eyes finally falling on her. He smiled, and shook his head. "I'm gonna sound so stupid right now. I never knew you had different coloured eyes." Ryder laughed lightly at Sam, then leaned closer, so that he could take a better look. "Awesome." he said, as she sat back.

"What's that?" Sam asked, pointing to the photo album on the table. Ryder picked it up and passed it to him, "It's a photo album I was putting together. It's pretty much my life so far. Dean finished it for me." Sam took it and opened to the first page. "Wow, you were a cute kid." Sam said, honestly. "Uh, thanks." Ryder said, with a giggle. Sam flicked through to the double page of him and her. "AH, Backseat Boredom!" Sam said, enthusiastically. Ryder nodded, "That was totally the most fun I've ever had on a hunt." Ryder said, laughing at the memory. "Check out your face. That's hilarious."

Sam smiled as he thought of that day. "You know that was Jess' Birthday?" he told her. "Oh, Sammy. I'm sorry." she started, but Sam stopped her. "No, no. It was good. I wasn't all sad and stuff, because you were makin' me laugh. Only Dean has ever done that for me, you know?" Ryder nodded, and giggled at the next photo Sam pointed out. "Well, I was bored. That's what I do when I'm bored." Sam laughed, "I'm sure that's completely what you get up to with Dean." he said, teasing her. "Oh yeah, I have tonnes of nude pictures." she said, rolling her eyes. "Aw no, I didn't wanna hear that." Sam said, laughing.

"Are you gonna stick around after.. you know?" Sam asked suddenly. Ryder turned and looked into Sam's eyes, and thought for a minute. "Yeah. I can't leave my Uncle, and I know your gonna need an ass kickin'." Sam smiled, this girl was weird. "Can I ask you a personal question?" Sam asked, hesitantly. "Shoot." she said, her usual tone in place. "Would you have married him if he was gonna live?" Ryder looked down at the photo Sam was looking at, and smiled. "Uh, yeah I would." she answered, truthfully. "Really? Wouldn't he drive you crazy?" Sam countered. This made her giggle. "No, he doesn't nor would he ever, drive me crazy." she answered.

"Who's drivin' who crazy, huh?" came Dean's voice. "You, driving her crazy." Sam said, closing the Album. "Nothin' wrong with a little insanity though." Ryder said, smirking at Dean. "Uh, Mrs. Jenkins seems to think your pregnant." Dean said, his cheeks slightly going pink. Ryder and Sam looked at eachother and cracked up laughing. Dean just stood there, cheeks burning. "Oh, well what did you say?" she asked. "I told her that it was Pneumonia, but she wouldn't believe me." Dean said, throwing himself into the nearest chair. "Apparently if it's a boy you have to call him James." Ryder and Sam shared another laugh, "Oh cheer up. Daddy Dean." Sam laughed.

* * *

A WEEK LATER..

They were less than 20 minutes away from her father's house, and Ryder was nervous. Her dad had seemed excited when she'd told him that Dean and Sam were both coming up with her. Her father was a hard man, always had been, never really accepting any of her boyfriends, what if he dismissed Dean like he did all the others? Maybe Dean would be different. She decided to play that card, Dean was infact very different. She looked up into the rear-view mirror, taking in his handsome face. He truely was the most beautiful man she'd ever met, her Mom was right about that. His gorgeous green eyes, fixed on the road, still has amazing as they were when she first seen them. He looked up at the mirror and smirked, "What?" he asked. Ryder shook her head, "Can't a girl look in the mirror?" she asked.

"Honey, you weren't lookin' at yourself like that." he shot back, he was now wearing a complete grin. "So? I don't hear you complainin'" she threw back. He chuckled and kept driving. She sat forward, and wrapped her arms around his shoulder. "He was tired huh?" she asked, looking over at Sam, who was fast asleep on the passenger side. "Yeah." Dean said, tapping her hand with his free one. "I have my seatbelt on. Don't worry." she said, before he could even ask. "Good girl." he said, laughing. "Are you nervous?" she asked, kissing his cheek. He nodded, and let out a long breath. "You'll do fine." she whispered. "And maybe if your lucky."

Dean smiled. "If I'm lucky what?" he asked. Ryder sat back and shook her head, "Not tellin'." she whispered. Dean shook his head and kept driving. A few minutes later they rolled down the long steep driveway of Alan O'Shay's rather large property. Dean pulled up the handbrake and cut the engine. "You grew up here?" he asked, turning to face his girlfriend. "Nope. This is 5 years old." She got out of the car, dragging her duffle bag with her. "C'mon princess. We're there." Dean said, shoving Sam. They got out, and grabbed their bags from the trunk. Ryder led the way to the frontdoor of the large country home.

She pushed the door open and stuck her head in. "Hello?" she called. "Ryder?" came a deep male voice. She smiled at Dean and walked in. The two boys stepped in behind her, heads spinning with how huge this place really was. "In the kitchen, darlin'." came the deep southern voice. Ryder headed down a long hallway, stepping into a brightly lit room. Her duffle still on her shoulder, she stood on the spot. "There's my babygirl." her dad called, crossing the room and pulling her into a tight hug. "Hey dad." she said, hugging him back. "Bout time you got up here. Where's your brother?" he asked, brown eyes shining. "Jackson's coming up tomorrow. He has to pick up the missus." Ryder drawled. Her father was looking over her shoulder.

"Is that Dean?" he whispered, Ryder turned and smiled. "No. That's Sam. Sam this is my dad, Alan." Sam smiled, and stepped forward, "Nice to meet you, sir" Ryder's father smiled and looked up into Sam's face. "Boy they sure make 'em tall over in Kansas, don't they?" Alan chuckled. "Daddy, this is Dean." Ryder said, her hand resting on Dean's forearm. "Well, hell. Your alot different to what I had in mind." Alan stepped closer, and stuck out his hand. "It's good to finally meet you." Dean took it, and smiled. "He sure is pretty isn't he?" Alan said, pulling Ryder into another hug.

"Dad? What's goin' on?" she whispered. "Nothin', I'm just happy to see you again." he answered kissing her temple. "So, Dean and Sam. You boys got a last name?" he asked, looking at them. "Uh, Winchester." Sam said. "Like the rifle?" Alan asked. "Like the rifle." Dean said, smiling. Ryder stepped back, and looked around. "Where's Susan?" she asked. Alan pulled his eyes away from Dean, and looked at his daughter. "She finally moved out." he answered. "You two divorced?" Ryder asked, a small grin on her face. Her father nodded and walked back to the bench where he'd been starting a meal. "Honey, show those boys to the rooms. Well Sam anyway, I'm sure Dean's gonna sleep with you." he said, smiling. Ryder nodded, and showed them out of the kitchen and up the stairs.

* * *

A few minutes later, Dean wandered down the stairs alone. Ryder was showing Sam the small library and that just didn't really appeal to him. Each step down was slow, he punched his fist on top of the other and looked around. 'Dude. This place is nice.' he thought. He looked at some pictures when he got to the bottom, noting alot of them didn't have Ryder or Jackson in them. "I went through a time where I forgot that my kids were just as important as my job." came Alan's deep voice. Dean nodded, "I know how that feels." Dean said, turning. He examined the man a little closer no longer feeling uneasy around him.

The man was not tall, but he wasn't a short man. His hair was well groomed, dark and greying. His eyes were brown, but showed all of his emotions, upon closer inspection Dean realised that Ryder had the same eyes as him. Alan, was a handsome guy, but his age was obvious. Wrinkles showing around his eyes, and mouth. Sam had said, "Dude, Ryder's dad totally looks like George Clooney", when they were upstairs. Dean could now see it. "They turned out fine, regardless." the older man told him. Dean smiled politely and looked back at the pictures. "Did you need some help in there?" Dean asked, pointing to the kitchen.

"If you want to." Alan said, walking back in. Dean followed the man in, "I didn't realise it was so big in here." Dean said, looking around. Alan laughed and beckoned him over. "Yeah, I sometimes forget that too." Dean shook his head, a small grin on his face. "So..?" Dean said, looking up from the vegetables he was cutting. "How long have you been seein' my daughter?" Alan asked. Dean frowned, counting in his mind. "Just over 8 months." he answerd, "Feels alot longer though." Alan looked at him, and smiled. "She's a handful, isn't she?" Dean nodded, "Yes, sir." Alan shook his head, "What's with the callin' me sir, stuff?" he asked, turning to Dean.

"Oh, Sammy and me just picked up from our Dad." Dean said, eyes fixed on the food infront of him. "Just call be Alan. Sir makes me feel old." Dean chuckled, "Ok, Alan it is." Alan, patted his back. "That's better." Dean could feel Alan's eyes on him, like he was looking for something, anything wrong with him. Dean looked up, eyes locking with the older man's. "I'm sorry. It's just something Ryder's mother used to say." Dean smiled, as he remembered what Ryder had told him. "The thing about a guy who'd save her?" Dean asked. Alan nodded, "You look just like she described." Dean's eyes widened. "She knew what I looked like?"

"She did, obviously." Alan said, looking back at the food infront of him. "I haven't seen Ryder this happy since before her mother went missing." Dean looked at him, eyes looking a little sad, "She's not completely happy." he said. "She's not completely sad either." Alan pointed out. Dean laughed, he knew that tone. "That's where you are?" came Ryder's voice. "Well, hell. Dad what are you makin' him do?" Dean looked up, and smiled. "He's just helpin' me, kiddo. He offered." Ryder sauntered over and sat on a stool infront of them. "Where's Sammy?" Dean asked. "Where do you think he is?"

Dean nodded, and looked back down. "Library?" Ryder made a ding noise. "Bingo!" she giggled. Dean looked up at her again, she was watching him with a smile on her face. He flicked his head, and she got up and came around the counter. He leant down and kissed her cheek. "You okay?" he asked. She nodded, "Just a little tired." she answered. "Ryder, wanna grab some plates and silver and seat the table?" Alan asked, smiling. She nodded and went about her business. Alan shook his head, a massive smile on his face.

* * *

Dinner went well, everyone got along. Sam had finally returned from the library and Dean was more comfortable in the presence of Alan. Ryder was finally able to eat a full meal again, since she'd left the hospital. "Oh, that was so good." Ryder said, sitting back in her seat. "Bout time too." Dean said, looking at her empty plate. She poked her tongue out at him then looked away. "Grow up, Ryder." Dean joked. "Make me." came her reply. She leaned forward, and kiss his cheek. "So, Dad. How's flyin' solo treatin' ya?" she asked across the table.

Alan laughed, "Good. Kinda makes me feel young again." Ryder laughed, and picked up her bottle of beer. "Cause she was bleedin' ya dry." Dean laughed at her blunt tone. "She's always been that way." Her father told him. Sam laughed, "So, has he." pointing to Dean. "Oh yeah. But never to Dad." Dean pointed out. "She gets away with it cause she's the youngest." Sam said, laughing. "Naw. I like to be able to joke with my kids. When she was younger she got into trouble for it." Ryder grinned, and put her bottle down. "So, you got a full ride at Stanford?" Alan asked Sam. "Yup. But I left early." he said, looking over at Dean.

"Why was that?" Alan asked. "Daddy." Ryder said, telling him to mind his business. "No, Ryd. It's alright. My girlfriend, uh, she died." Sam said, looking back to Alan. "Aw, son. I'm sorry to hear that." Sam nodded his thanks. Alan turned his attention on Dean. "And you followed your father, into the family business?" Dean nodded, "So, you any good?" he asked. Dean looked at Ryder, then turned back. "I do alright." he answered. "Well, now I know your bein' bashful. I hear you one of the best hunter's out. All I hear bout is Johnny Winchester's eldest." Dean looked at the table and smiled. "That's cause he put in the hours." Sam said, remembering all the training Dean did as a child.

"Ryder's been givin' me a run for my money, though." Dean said, laughing. "That's cause I've got a couple of years on you." she told him, laughing at his face. "Man, your 26. How do you have a couple of years on me?" Ryder looked at her father. "She's been hunting since she turned 6. How old were you?" Dean realised he was beat. Sticking his hands up in mock surrender. "I was 10." Sam laughed, "Dude, that's like 4 years over you." Dean shook his head, "b*tch." Sam stopped laughing, "Jerk." Ryder shook her head, "See what I have to put up with?" Her dad was too busy laughing at the boys infront of him.

* * *

It was 9 o'clock at night, and Ryder was outside, sitting alone in the jacuzzi. Her mind had wondered away from the happy thoughts, and torward the thoughts that brought her to tears. Her eyes were fixed on the dark trees off in the distance, two small tears falling down each cheek. Just over a month from now, the man she loved would die. He would be gone, and there's not a damn thing that she could do to stop it. She could yell, and scream, and kick, and punch. But none of that would keep him breathing. She sighed, not bothering to wipe her tears away, she didn't care anymore.

She reached behind her and tied her hair up into a messy ponytail. Another set of tears fell from her eyes, 'I'm sorry, Dean' she thinks. 'I'm sorry I can't save you.' Her eyes moved from the trees to the moon, eyes pleading for some help. She heard the dull sound of barefeet on grass, but didn't turn, she knew it was Dean, she could hear his jeans dragging along the ground. He didn't speak, he just sat on the edge of the spa, following her gaze. He looked down at her and sighed, standing and getting out of his clothes. He stepped into the jacuzzi, and sat infront of her.

She looked away, eyes falling on anything but him. "Your not even gonna laugh cause I'm in my underwear?" he asked, leaning against the wall of the spa. "At least they're shorts, and they're black." she said, quietly. He looked back towards the house, his green eyes glowing in the light above them. He sighed, and let his body slide down the wall, his head falling under the water. Ryder turned a little, watching him. When he started coming back up, pushing his hair back, she turned away again. "Come here." she said, turning to face him. He looked at her oddly and moved closer. She laughed, "It's okay. Come here." He came to a stop infront of her, eyes locked with hers, a cheeky grin now in place.

She lifted her head a little, lips brushing softly against his. He leaned in a little closer, kissing her a little harder. She pulled away, and smiled, Dean kissed her on the cheek. He turned around and laid his back against her front, his head resting against her shoulder. "You right there?" she asked, giggling at him. "Uh huh." he said, his eyes closed. "What is it about you, Winchester?" she whispered into his ear. "What do you mean?" he asked. "My dad accepted you straight away. He's never done that before." she answered, hands rubbing his biceps. "I have that affect on people." he said, a cocky grin replacing his calm expression.

He sat up and moved back across to otherside of the jacuzzi. Eyes falling on Ryder's, "Please stop crying all the time." he said, his voice almost begging her. "What do you want me to do?" she asked, her voice in a similar tone. "I don't know. Just don't cry, 'cause you know I can't handle that." Ryder stood, and walked over to him. Her hands fell on his face, and she pulled his head up to look at her. "I can't handle the thought of you not bein' here." So either way one of us is miserable. He wrapped his arms around her waist, and pulled her down to him. His hand coming to rest on her neck, his eyes full of sorrow.

"If only I'd seen you earlier." he said, quietly, his head falling against her cheek. "How would that have changed this?" she whispered. He sighed, his hands rubbing her sides. "I don't know, just more time I guess." he answered. She felt him pull her closer, her arms came to rest on his shoulders. She kissed his forehead, "Maybe, or maybe it would have been harder." He moved his head, his lips brushing her ear. "No, I mean way earlier." Ryder pulled back and looked into his eyes. "You mean?" He nodded, "Yeah, that's exactly what I mean." he said, sitting back against the wall.

"Dean, don't play with me." she said, sitting back down. He laughed, "I'm not. I would have, if I had of met you earlier." Ryder shook her head. "You don't look like the marryin' type." she said, looking him up and down. "I wasn't." he said, smirking. "And you are now?" she said, kicking water at him. He chuckled and pulled her back to him. "'Course. Why? Wouldn't you marry me?" he drawled, tickling her. "DON'T DEAN! Of course I would have." she giggled. "You serious?" he asked, looking at her face. "No, I said it just so you felt like I kicked you in the balls." she said, sarcastically.

"Have I ever told you that you look HOT in a bikini?" Dean said, eyes dancing down her body. "I don't believe you have." she said, smiling at him seductively. He moved closer, arms leaning on either side of her head. "Well, you do." he whispered. "But you'd look better outta it." Ryder laughed, her hands coming to rest on the band of his shorts. She let them fall across his hips, and pulled herself out of the spa. Laughing at the lost look in his eyes. She pulled her hair out of the hair tie and jumped into the pool. "You comin'?" she called. Dean tilted his head, looking for any signs of her dad.

When he was happy with his observations, he climbed out of the spa. Walked over to the pool, and sat on the edge. His legs dangling in the water, eyes fixed on Ryder. "What are you doin'?" he asked, laughing at her. "Floatin'. What's it look like?" she laughed. Dean smiled, crossing his arms over his chest. "Your a funny girl." he told her. He got into the water, and walked over to her. She was now treading water in the middle of the pool. "Hey." she said, as he pulled her close to him. "Hey yourself." he said back, hands resting on her butt, as she sat on his thighs. He pulled his legs away from under her and walked towards the wall of the pool. "What's got into you?" sjhe giggled. Dean moved closer and shrugged, "I'm just giving you what you want." he whispered.

"What if my Dad comes out?" she whispered as he played with the bottoms of her bikinis. "I promise, I'll go really really slow." he whispered, pulling the tie on the side of the bottoms. She tilted her head back, "Dean, my dad's just inside." she moaned. He kissed her neck, and laughed. "Then why are you pullin' my shorts down?" She giggled, "Cause it's naughty, and I like it." Dean kissed her, his hand resting on the back of her head. She pulled him into her and he sighed heavily. "What are you tryin' to do to me?" he chuckled. Ryder just smiled at him, her eyes suddenly seeming darker. "We haven't got anythin'?" he whispered.

She pulled him closer again and whispered. "You might get your wish then." Dean chuckled, kissing her neck again. Dean slowly pushed into her, smiling when she made a little noise. She wrapped her legs around his hips, and Dean pushed her up a little higher. She looked into his eyes, and smiled, then slowly leant down and kissed him. Ryder pushed down against him, as he pushed up, but kept it at a slow pace. Knowing if they got to wild, her Dad would come out. Suddenly Dean grunted, and Ryder giggled putting her finger over his lips. "Shhh.." she whispered through her laughter. Dean ground up against her again, this time a little harder. Ryder leant her head back, a soft moan escaping her lips. His hands slide up her stomach, resting on her breats, his head laid against hers. He was as close to her as ever, but still felt so far away.

"Are you okay?" he whispered to her. She nodded, her hands grabbing the edge of the wall behind her. Dean's face screwed into a frown, and Ryder rubbed her nose against Dean's neck. His hot breath caressing the skin on her's. Her legs tightened around his waist, his head fell against her shoulder. He gave one final thrust, with that he gave her everything. "Oh, god. You gotta stop doin' that to me." she told him, giggling as his stubbled cheek tickled her neck. "I love you." she told him. He pulled his head back, his hand pushing her curly hair from her face. "I know." he told her, "I love you too."

* * *

* * *

"Hurry up, woman!" Jackson called from the door of his small house. "I'm comin', geez." came the voice of his girlfriend. He leaned against the pole of his porch, looking out across the street. He kicked a small stone that was in front of his booted foot. The front door clicked shut behind him and he turned, she was looking up at him rather uneasily. "Relax." he said, grabbing her shoulders and leading her to his car. "I am relaxed." she snapped. Jackson chuckled and shut the car door. He walked around to the driver's side, and got in. "Have you always been highstrung?" he asked, laughing at her. "I'm not highstrung." she said, frowning. "Okay." Jackson reversed out of his driveway and out of the street.

"So who's gonna be there?" she asked, blonde hair blowing in the wind, sunglasses covering her eyes. "My Dad, my sister, her boyfriend and his brother. Why?" She turned to face him, "Just wanted to know who I'm meeting is all." she said. Jackson reached over and patted her thigh, "The scariest one is my sister." he joked. "Oh great." she said, looking back out of the window. "She doesn't bite though." Jackson said, laughing at his girlfriend's distrust. "Just don't get smart with her, like you tend to do, and you'll be fine." She huffed, and turned up the radio. Jackson shook his head and looked back at the road. She'd changed a lot since he met her, she seemed more uptight now.

-Flashback-

Jackson walked into a rather crowded bar, eyes scanning the crowd. He'd been tailing a vampire that had strayed away from it's nest alone. "Damn thing." he growled, eyes falling an a small figured blonde girl who looked incredibly p*ssed off. He pushed through the crowd towards her, eyes still searching for the vampire. "UGH! I told you to leave me alone!" the girl yelled, yanking her arm away from a guy with dirty blonde hair. "Gotcha!" Jackson said to himself. He pushed through the crowd, coming to stand behind the rather short guy. He tapped him on the shoulder, "'scuse me buddy. Do I know you from somewhere?" he drawled. The guy turned eyes widening when he saw Jackson. He went to run, but Jackson had a firm grip on the back of his neck. "I don't think so. Sorry miss, this man wont be botherin' ya again."

Jackson pulled the guy through the crowded bar, and out the back door. "Get offa ME!" he screamed. Jackson laughed and threw the thing to the ground. "Nope, sorry buddy." He kicked him in the face, the guy fell unconcious to the ground. Jackson grabbed his gun from the back of his jeans, aiming it at the vampires head. The small waitress ran out grabbing his arm. "What the hell are you doing??" she screamed. Jackson pulled the trigger, bullet piercing the vampires throat. "Killin' a vampire." he told her casually. Snatching his arm back, he squatted. "I knew your dad." he told her, before she could ask. "You did?" she asked. "Uh huh." Jackson looked over the vampire, eyes examining every detail. "Creepy b*st*rd." he said, standing and picking it up, throwing it over his shoulder.

He headed towards his black 1970 El Camino. "Wait." the girl ran up to him. "Yeah?" he said, as he threw the vampire into the back of his ute, leaing forward to pull a blanket over it. "I'll help you." she said, pulling open the passenger side door, throwing herself into the ute. "Okie dokie." he said, saluting her. He got in and looked at her, she was pretty, very pretty. Her long blonde curly hair, framed her face. Her dark hazel eyes full of emotion, she looked at him quickly then looked away. Jackson started the car, driving off to an abandoned part of town, to burn the body.

"You're a strange girl you know that? Just gettin' into cars with strangers." Jackson drawled, pulling up at an deserted block of land. "Not all strangers. Just the good lookin' ones." she said back. "Right." Jackson said, getting out of the car. He pulled the body into the darkness, placing it on a wooden bench. He salted, and burnt the body, the girl hanging onto his arm. At that moment he was needed. Not by a family member, but a girl who was attracted to him. That, scared the hell out of him.

-End Flashback-

"How long til we get there?" she asked. Jackson looked at his watch, "Another 10 minutes." he answered. She sighed, her head falling against the leather seat. They passed a small shopping centre, and a black car caught her attention. She sat up and turned around, eyes wide with what she saw. A small smile crossing her face. "What?" Jackson asked, looking at her out of the corner of her eye. "Nothin' just thought I saw someone I knew." she told him, smiling sweetly.

A few minutes later, they pulled up outside his father's house, a sigh of relief escaping Jackson's mouth. "What?" his girlfriend asked. "Step-mother's not here." he said with a smile. "Come on." They got out of the car, bags on their shoulders. Jackson grabbed her hand, and led her into the house. "Dad?" he called. "Library." his father's voice called from upstairs. They made their way upstairs, and along a long hallway. "Jackson!" his father said, walking over to him, pulling him into a tight hug. "Your looking great." he said. "And who's your friend?" Jackson stepped back, putting his arm around his girlfriend's back. "Dad. This is Jo." he said, proudly. "Nice to meet you, Mr O'Shay." she said, politely. "It's Alan. It's a pleasure." he said, kissing her on the cheek.

"Boy you kids and blondes." Alan said, walking back to the chair. "I know huh." Jackson said, "Come on. I'll show you where we're stayin'." he whispered to Jo. "Okay." she answered, mind going back to the Impala she'd seen in town.

* * *

"Looks like your brother's here." Dean said, as he rolled his car slowly down the steep hill. "Oh, that means the girls here." Ryder said, rubbing her hands together. "Damn it, why'd Sammy have to stay behind." Dean laughed, "Because he didn't want to come shopping. Not that I particularly wanted to go." Ryder glared at him. "Hey. I'll take the shirt back." Dean put his hands up, a smile on his face. "Shutting up." They got out of the car, bags in hand, and made their way to the house. Sam was waiting outside for them, "You met her?" Dean asked, looking at Ryder's eager face. "Nah, I went for a walk. Just got back now." Ryder huffed. "Shall we?"

Ryder pushed the door open, and walked into the warmth of the house. "They're in the kitchen." she said. Dean pulled her hand, "Come put the bags away first." he said, laughing at her. "You come too." she said, pulling Sam's arm. A few minutes later, Ryder sauntered down the stairs, and along the hallway. "Well, well. Little sis has finally here." Jackson taunted, standing up. Ryder practically pounced on him. "Ohh, you look so good!" she said, hugging him tightly. "How you feelin'?" Jackson asked her. "Better. I still cough now and then. But I'm better." Ryder's eyes fell on the blonde girl at the table. "Ryder, sweety. This is Jo, Jackson's girlfriend." came her dad's voice.

"Hi." Jo said, quietly. "Hey." Ryder answered. "Jo, that's Ryder's boy-" Alan started. "Dean!" Jo said, standing. "Jo?" Dean asked, eyes wide. "Sam. Jackson." Sam said, pointing at himself and Jackson. Jo gave him a deadly glare, then looked at Dean with a hurt look on her face. A look, that Ryder didn't miss. "God, not another one." she said, rolling her eyes. "No, it's not." Dean said, eyes away from Jo. "She's a friend's daughter. That's all." Ryder looked at him, quizzically, then turned her gaze on Sam. He nodded, "He's not lyin', Ry." Sam told her. "In that case. Welcome to the family." Ryder said, sarcastically.

"Ryder. Stop it." Alan said, looking at Jackson. "Sorry, hun." Ryder said, quietly. Dean walked over to Ryder, and pulled her arm. "I needa talk to you a minute." he whispered. Ryder nodded, and followed him outside. "She had a thing for me ages ago. I thought she'd be over it. I mean, I haven't seen her since before you came to Bobby's all cut up." he told her, as soon as the door was shut. Ryder chuckled at him. "Ry, it's not funny. She's with your brother, and he's givin' me the evil eye." Dean said, turning his back on Jackson. "It's not me you have to prove that too. I trust whatever you say. Jackson might not trust her for all we know." Ryder said, touching Dean's shoulder. Dean lifted an eyebrow, "What if she jumps on me or somethin'?" Ryder shook her head. "She ain't gettin' her little bratty hands on my man." Ryder said, seriously.

"How did I ever get by without you?" Dean asked, wrapping his arms around her. "Horny waitresses." Ryder stated flatly. "Oh yeah, that's right." he laughed. Ryder looked up at him. "Go talk to Jackson. I'll play sister's with Jo." Dean cracked up laughing. "Jo didn't grow up playing with guns. So be nice." Ryder slapped his shoulder, and walked through the door. "Hey. You had the grand tour?" Ryder asked Jo. She shook her head. "Come on. I'll show you." she turned to Dean and rolled her eyes. 'You owe me.' she mouthed.

* * *

It was 1 am and Dean was sitting alone in the kitchen, an empty glass between his strong hands. They'd been at Ryder's father's for two weeks now, and Dean had no intention of leaving anytime soon. 'One month left.' he thought, spinning the glass around and shying. He pushed it away and buried his face in his hands. A small sob escaping his throat. He brought his hands down and looked around the room. He looked at his left hand, a thin silver ring sitting on his ring finger. Ryder had given it to him a week ago, a sign that she was his, even after he was gone. He chuckled at the thought, remembering what he'd said to her. 'You askin' me to marry you?'

She'd just smiled and shook her head. His head flicked when he heard footsteps in the hallway. "Boy, everything alright?" came Alan's voice. Dean wiped his face, and coughed. "Ah, yeah. Just not really tired." he said, as the older man entered the room. "What's goin' on that you kids ain't tellin' me?" Alan asked, sitting next to Dean at the counter. Dean looked sideways at the man, and sighed. "Almost a year ago, Sammy was murdered by this other kid. The guy was workin' for the demon that killed our Mom." he paused, looking away. "The Yellow Eyed one?" Dean nodded. "I couldn't handle the guilt. It was my job to keep him safe, and he got killed on my watch." Dean said, closing his eyes tight. "Oh, son. You didn't?" Alan asked, sadly. "So I got in my car, and drove to the crossroads, and signed my life away." Dean said, head nodding as he finished.

"Then Ryder came back into your life?" Dean nodded. "Yeah, and I was stubborn as hell to get her." Dean said, a smile crossing his face. "Son. I'm sorry." Alan said, putting an arm around Dean's shoulders. Dean nodded, and turned his head away, a single tear falling from his eye. "She only talks to me if I talk to her first now. Her words don't come out when she tries, she just walks away cryin'." Dean said, turning to face Alan. "She not just copin' with losin' you son. I can't tell you any more than that. But you really need to talk to her." he told the young man before him. "Don't let her do anything stupid. Please." Dean begged. "Son, you don't have to worry about her doin' that." Alan said, patting Dean's cheek. Dean stood, and looked down at Alan. "I'm gonna go to bed. She's probably cryin' again." Dean whispered. "She was when I walked passed." Alan told him. "See ya tomorrow, alright. Just go to her."

Dean nodded, and left the room. He made his way up the staircase slowly. He could hear her soft sobs already, he sighed and opened the door. Poking his head around, what he saw broke his heart. Ryder was on her side, facing away from him, her small body wracking with her soft sobs. Dean walked over, and sat on the bed. Removing his jeans slowly then turning and sliding up behind her. His arm pulling her closer to him. "I'm sorry." he whispered. "I'm so sorry." Ryder nodded, "I know. I'm sorry too." she whispered. Dean's eyes fell on the small tattoo on her neck, he kissed her back and held back his own tears. "What's wrong?" he asked, when he heard her sigh. "Nothin's wrong. Everything's right. Just bad timing." she said, quietly.

"Ry, what are you sayin'?" Dean asked, a small frown on his face. Ryder turned over, bloodshot eyes falling on his perfect green ones. "Don't freak out on me please?" she whispered. Dean nodded, "Just tell me what's goin' on." he pressed. She took a breath and looked away. "Dean, I'm pregnant." A tiny tear fell from her left eye, and rolled across her nose. Dean pulled her closer, eyes filling with tears of his own. He didn't know what else to do, he just held her, and listened to her cry.

AN: plz review and let me know what you guys think

XOXO


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: i hope everyone is enjoying the story so far, yes i know it every long, long ch.'s , just let me know if you want shorter ones or it's fine as is.**

plz leave a review on how your liking the story so far.

* * *

Alan sat alone, in the spot where he'd been in since Dean had left. Tears streaming down his face. Ryder's whole life has been full of pain and misery, and the first patch of happiness she's had will be gone in a month. Alot of her pain, and suffering was his lack of parental concern. It was his fault, he pushed his children away, not being able to look at them without seeing his lost love. Her disappearance had broken his heart, he never gave himself time to grieve, he just moved on in hopes he wouldn't feel the pain. "Oh, Ellie. How am I gonna get her through this one?" he asked, looking up at the ceiling. He shook his head, a tear falling onto the counter top. His daughter was pregnant, and falling apart. Her boyfriend nearly as bad. He couldn't even begin to think how Sam must feel.

He looked out of the kitchen window, eyes falling on the trees in the distance. His mind ticking, searching for anyway to save this young man, who just 10 minutes ago fell apart infront of him. Then he had an idea, the only one he could think of that would ever save this man. He stood, and grabbed his jacket, stuffing his feet into his boot. He quietly made his way from the house, and into his garage. Finding his prized possession, he rolled her outside. He looked up at the only lit window in the whole house, as he got onto his motorbike. "There's no way my grandchild is growin' up without it's father." he said, bitterly.

He sped off into the night, headed for the only place that would save Dean from his terrifying fate. He headed towards a place hunters often went, and returned with a dark mark over their heads. Alan O'Shay was on a mission, his own personal hunt. He had to save Dean no matter what the cost.

* * *

"Are you bein' serious?" Dean asked, twenty minutes later. Ryder giggled, her head resting on his chest. "Yeah, I am." she whispered, her throat was sore from crying. "So, there's really a baby in there?" he asked, pointing at her stomach. Ryder sat up and looked down into his eyes. "Yes, there's really a baby in there." she said, eyes sparkling at him. Dean looked at her stomach, as if he was trying to see through it. Ryder laughed, "It's no bigger than a speck of dirt, right now." she told him. "I know that." he told her, frown forming on his brow. "Your so strange." she told him, eyes serious, a small grin on her lips. His eyes snapped up at her, his mind was obviously trying to wrap itself around the information.

"There's a baby, in there, that we made?" he said slowly, laughing at how stupid he sounded. "There is." Ryder said, a small smile on her face. "How far along?" he asked, a hint of joy in his voice. "7 weeks." she told him. "So before the pneumonia?" Dean asked. Ryder nodded, "You sound different." He pulled her down ontop of him, her head leaning on his chest. His heart was beating so fast, she thought it was going to jump out of his chest. "That's why." he said, chuckling. "So your happy?" Dean nodded, "I'm happy." Ryder cuddled into him, and he pulled the sheets up over them, arms wrapping across her small back.

It really was perfect, but a serious case of bad-timing. Dean was excited, but a little disappointed. Ryder was clinging to him, eyes still spilling tears randomly, just now it was happiness. She was going to be a mother, and regardless to his situation, Dean was going to be a father. "So this is why you've been getting up at the crack of dawn?" Dean said, chuckling. "Oh god. Don't remind me." Ryder said. "So not funny." Ryder said, as Dean laughed whole-heartedly. "Sorry. Just the way you said it was funny." Dean said, rubbing her back. "Shut up." Ryder said, burying her face in his chest.

A few minutes later, he tilted his head, and noticed Ryder had fallen asleep. He brushed her hair gently off her face, and pushed his head back into the pillow. His eyelids slowly falling shut. The stayed that way all night, Dean on his back, Ryder laying over his body, head resting against his chest, his steady heartbeat in her ear. His arms protectively wrapped around her, both sleeping peacefully. Something they both needed, an uninterupted full nights sleep. The warmth of eachother's body keeping them in a cosy place.

They were both oblivious to the fact that Alan had left. Not even the sound of the motorbike revving pulled them from their deep slumber. Oblivious to the fact, that Alan was gone out to save the life of his grandchild's father. All for his daughter's forgiveness. He owed her happiness, in a lifetime of pain. He couldn't bring back her mother, but he could at least help her save her man.

* * *

* * *

Jo was up at the crack of dawn, she'd been woken up by someone in the bathroom. She walked to the door, eyes half closed. "HEY!" she yelled banging on the door. "SOME OF US ARE TRYIN' TO SLEEP!" The toilet flushed and the door swung open making Jo stumble forward. Coming face to face with Ryder. "If ya don't like it. Go home." Ryder spat, walking over to the sink, throwing cold water on her face. "What's your problem with me?" Jo asked, eyes darting to the floor. "Too many to list." Ryder said, pushing passed her and out the door. "Is it because of Dean?" Jo asked.  
Ryder stopped, staring at the wall infront of her, thinking. "No. It's the way you talk to me." Ryder said.

"I don't talk to you any different than I do Dean." Jo said, her voice slightly raised. "See and that's why he never felt the same way about you. Your childish, you needa grow up." Ryder said, hand on her bedroom door. Jo sighed, "What does he even see in you?!" Jo spat. Ryder didn't take the bait, she was sick of arguing with her. "A woman. He sees a woman when he looks at me. Not a little girl." Ryder said turning to face her. "Please, Jo. Leave me alone, I'm tired, and sick." Ryder pushed open her bedroom door, revealing a very comfortable, very asleep Dean. Jo looked away, "Whatever." she said, and walked away. Ryder closed the door behind her.

Jo stepped into the room she was sharing with Jackson. She sat on the bed next to him, bumping him awake. "What?" he growled. Jo got in and cuddled up to him. "Do you think I'm childish?" she asked, looking into his tired face. "Kinda. Why?" Jackson answered. "Cause Ryder said, I am." Jackson shook his head and laid back down. "I told you before we even got her not to rub her the wrong way. I'm not fightin' with my sister over your moodiness." Jackson turned his back on her, burying his face back into his pillow. "He loves her alot, doesn't he?" Jo asked, not really expecting an answer.

Jackson rolled his eyes, and turned over again. "Yeah. He does, so don't do anything to screw it up." She sat there, staring at the wall. "It's over for us, isn't it?" Jackson sighed, and rolled back over. "Pretty much. I can't love you if you don't want to love me." Jo nodded, and laid back down. Curling up on her side of the bed, tears falling down her face. She really had wanted to get to know Ryder, she just pushed her away because of her relationship with Dean.

-Flashback-

They were in the kitchen, talking about a hunt. Dean and Sam were arguing over what it could be. Jackson and Alan were working out tactics, and Ryder was sitting tiredly next to Dean, not paying alot of attention. When Jo walked in the talking stopped, giving her reason to believe they were talking about her. Ryder yawned loudly, crossing her arms over her chest. "What?" Jo snapped. Ryder's eyes snapped open wide, looking over at Jackson. Eyes asking if she did anything wrong. "Nothin'." Ryder answered slowly. Jo shook her head and turned around. Dean's arm found it's way around Ryder's shoulders. "Don't hurt her. Her mom will hurt me."

"So, I'm thinkin' Wendi-OUCH!" Jackson stopped, looking at Dean. "What the HELL?" he said, rubbing his shin. Dean frowned at him, and looked over at Jo. "You guys goin' on a hunt?" she asked, turning slowly. Dean's eyes darted to Jackson who understood straight away. "Uh, yeah." Dean said, leaning back over the papers. "Cool. I'll ride with you then." Jo said, sitting down across from Dean. "No." was all he said. Jo shook her head. "Don't tell me what to do." Dean laughed, "Jo, you suck at this. I'm sorry but your stayin' here."

"I'm not staying here with HER." Jo said, pointing at Ryder. Hand instantly clapping her mouth, eyes darting at Jackson. "Okay. I'm sick of this. Why don't you grow up!" Ryder spoke up. "I have." Jo screamed back. "THEN f***in' ACT LIKE IT!" Ryder snapped. Jo stood up, and leaned her hands on the table. "You think you can just shut everyone up with your badass attitude. That sh*t doesn't work on me." Jo said, coldly. Dean scrunched his nose up and looked at Sam. "Uh, Oh." Sam whispered. "Jackson where did you pick her up from. She's nuts." Ryder said, looking at her brother. "What you gonna ignore me now?" Jo spat, walking around the table invading Ryder's personal space. Only to stand back when Ryder stood.

"Back off." Ryder said, coldly. Jo glared at her, if looks could kill Ryder wouldn't be breathing right now. "Why? You gonna hurt me?" Jo taunted. Ryder bared her teeth, and turned to her brother. Two seconds later a fist flew at Jo, hitting her in the cheek. Ryder shook her hand and stepped back. "Don't you EVER speak to me like that again. Next time I'll do worse." Ryder stormed out of the room. Jo looked down at Dean. "You didn't stick up for me?" she whispered, hand pressed against her cheek. "No." Dean said standing up. "I didn't" He left the room, calling for Ryder to slow down.

-End Flashback-

"I want to go home." Jo whispered. "I'll take you later." Jackson told her. Jo pulled the bedcovers up around her. She liked Jackson alot, but she was still very much inlove with Dean. She couldn't stand to see him the way he was with Ryder. It made her jealous. She cried silently to herself.

* * *

Ryder was sitting up, silently cursing her morning sickness. It was 6am and she was wide awake, she'd only gone to sleep three hours ago. Her hands were laying flat against her toned stomach, wondering what she would look like a few months time. Dean stirred in the bed next to her, she smiled when she saw he was still sleeping. "Well, kiddo. Looks like it's just you and me." she said, her hand patting her stomach softly. Dean stirred again, it was now clear that he was dreaming. Something, Ryder had never heard him talk about. Dean rarely had dreams, she'd know she was normally awake before him.

Dean mumbled in his sleep, but Ryder didn't catch it. But judging by the frown on his face, he was infact having a nightmare. Ryder didn't wanna wake him, she knew he would be grumpy all day if she did, but he looked so terrified. "Dean.." she whispered, nudging him alittle. He grabbed her hand, but stayed asleep. "Dean.." she said a little louder. His eyes snapped open, looking around the room. When they finally came to rest on her, he pulled her into a tight hug. "Dean, what's wrong?" Ryder asked, her voice laced with worry. He just held her tighter, as if he needed proof that she was really there.

"Dean, what is it?" she asked, pulling back and searching his eyes. "Nothin' it was just a nightmare." he said, thumb brushing her cheek softly. "Dean, stop keepin' me in the dark. I wanna help you. Stop bottlin' it up." she told him, her voice hard. Dean nodded, and patted the matress next to him. She laid down, and jumped a little, when he moved between her legs, laying his cheek on her stomach. She smiled when she realised what he was doing. Her hand running through his hair. He began to explain his dream, and she took in every single word.

-Dean's Dream-

A little boy sat playing in a small play pen in the middle of a very large room. Giggling as he threw his toys around. He couldn't have been more than 3 years old. His short hair was a light blonde, and seemed to lean into a tiny natural mohawk. His tiny body was mildly tanned, and a few tiny freckles were sprinkled across his little nose. Dean stepped closer to the playpen, a pair of big green eyes looked up at him. Eyes that mirrored his own, down to every little speck of gold. The little boy smiled up at him, a tiny hand poiting up at him.

Dean slowly squatted, the little boy's eyes following his every move. The little boy pulled himself up, hands coming to rest on the top of the fence that kept him inside. "Daddy." the little boy whispered, a huge smile on his face. Dean frowned, his hand brushing the little boys cheek. A tiny hand grabbing his necklace, eyes examining it. Dean's hand fell onto the little boy's neck. He felt a small knot under his index finger, "What you got there?" he asked softly. The little boy pulled on the leather rope, revealing the same necklace. "Mommy." he said, pointing to the other room. "Mommy gave you that?" The boy nodded. "Is daddy's." he said, eyes looking back up at Dean.

"Baby, who are you talkin' to?" Ryder asked, as she walked into the room. The boy turned, and smiled up at her. "Daddy." he said happily. Ryder's eyes scanned the room, eyes falling on a picture of Dean on the shelf. "Dean, baby. Daddy's with the angels." Ryder said, stepping over the wall of the play pen, sitting crosslegged infront of her son. Dean's eyes widened, she couldn't see him. "No, Daddy's there." The boy pointed to where Dean was still squatting, a smile on his face. Ryder looked sadly at the boy. "Miss Missouri said Daddy's always with me." Little Dean said, his little face screwing into a frown.

Ryder giggled, "That's cause you look like him, baby." The boy shook his head. "Nooo, she said he is here." Ryder's eyes grew watery, looking to where her son had pointed seconds earlier. "Dean, stop it." she whispered, pulling the little boy into a hug, her hand holding the back of his head. A tear falling from her eye. The phone started ringing, and Ryder looked at the boy. "I love you." she whispered. The boy smiled, "I love you, lots." the little boy said back. Ryder got up and stepped out of the pen. Leaving the room.

The boy turned back, and walked over to where Dean was. "Why did you go?" his son asked him. Dean looked down at the boy, "I had to." His hand touching the boys hair. "Mommy cries still." Dean looked away, tears in his own eyes. "Daddy still cries too?" the boy asked. "Naw, I just wish Mommy would stop." Dean whispered. "Me too." The boy sat, and picked up his toy. "Uncle Sammy got me dis." Little Dean turned a small black car in his hands. Dean smiled at it, taking it in his hand. "Is like yours." he whispered. "Mommy says when I get big. I have the real one." Dean smiled, a tear falling from his cheek. Little Dean took the car back, and put it down carefully.

He stepped closer, his little hand coming up to wipe Dean's cheek. "Angels don't cry, Daddy." Dean bit his lip, and looked down into his own eyes. "Daddy's not an angel." he said. The boy shook his head, "Your my angel, Daddy." Dean pulled the little boy into his arms, smiling sadly. "Okay, kiddo." The boy turned around in Dean's arms, and pointed to the other room. "Go that way." Dean kissed the boys head, and stood. Slowly, he walked through the wall. Suddenly, the scene changed, and he found himself in a room full of pre-schoolers.

"My Daddy is a policeman." a little girl said, smiling brightly. 'Oh, no.' Dean thought. "My daddy is a builder" a little boy with brown shaggy hair said. He spotted Little Dean, sitting next to the little boy with shaggy brown hair, a sad look on his face. "Dean? What does your Daddy do?" the little girl asked. He looked up, green eyes glowing through dark eyelashes. "My daddy's with the angels." he whispered. "What does that mean?" the little boy next to him asked. "Means he's in heaven." his son told the other boy. The little girl sniffed. "I'm sorry, Dean." she said. "Mommy said he wanted to be a mechanic." Little Dean said, "But he worked with his Daddy instead." The girl nodded.

Dean sat on the table next to them, watching how brave the little boy was. The little boy looked up and smiled. Dean frowned and stood. He walked out of the room, finding himself next to a long row of lockers. "WINCHESTER!" came a deep rough voice. Dean turned, knowing it wouldn't be him. There stood his son, the spitting image of himself at the age of 16, the same stance and everything. He didn't react to the older boy's yelling, just shut his locker. "What?" he said. "YOU MADE ME LOOK BAD INFRONT OF EVERYONE." The kid was furious, yet his son was calm. "I didn't make YOU do anything. I'm just better." Little Dean said, turning to walk away. "Better at being a Mommy's boy." The other boy spat.

"Don't bring my Mom into this." his son said. "How's your Daddy, Winchester?" he older boy drawled. Little Dean turned, grabbing the guy by the shirt, slamming him into the lockers. "Don't you even think about it." his son growled. "My Dad was four times the man you'll ever be." The older boy's eyes narrowed on his son. "Your daddy's dead. His nothing now." His sons hands shoved the guy into the locker, "At least his not a drug pusher." his son said, letting the guy go. Walking away from the older boy.

Dean followed cautiously, he stopped just outside the doors of the school. His eyes falling on his 1967 Chevy Impala. "Dad, why'd you do it?" his son said, spinning around. Eyes full of anger. Dean was taken aback, his mouth wide open. "Yeah, I can still see you." Dean blinked a couple of times. "Cause Sammy needed me." he answered. His son nodded, but then frowned. "Well I need you now." He stormed off. He stopped at the car, and pointed to the distance. "Mom needs you too. She always has." He threw himself behind the wheel and sped off.

Dean stood alone, outside of the school his son had just stormed out of. He blinked and when he opened his eyes, he was back at the house again, staring down into the eyes of the little boy that he helped create. "I love you, Daddy." the 3 year old said, a small hand gripping his finger. "I love you too kiddo." The boy kissed his cheek, and turned his back on him. "You better go back now. Your Mommy probably misses you." Dean stood, and everything went black.

-End Dream-

Ryder stared down at him, frowning. She could understand why he looked so upset, it wasn't terror. Dean was seeing things, he might miss out on. "So, his name's Dean huh?" she asked, looking at him. "Apparently. But it's a dream. How true could it be?" he said, chin resting softly on her tummy. "You never know." she said, smiling. Dean looked up at her, smiling up at her. "I guess."

* * *

It was late in the afternoon, when Alan returned home. He stepped into the house and was assaulted with the smell of homecooking. He heard Ryder giggle, a small smile crossed his face. He walked into the kitchen and found Ryder and Dean cooking, Sam sitting on the sidelines. "Hey kids." Alan said, smiling when all three looked up. "Hey, Dad." Ryder said, laughing. "I take it you told them the good news?" Alan said, after kissing her on the temple. "Well, I've told Dean." she said, looking at Sam. "Told Dean what?" Sam asked, he was confused.

"Ryder's pregnant." Dean said, smiling softly. Sam looked at her, then to her dad, both nodding at him. Sam stood and walked around the counter, pulling her into a tight hug. A to congratulatory one, and a I'll be there for you one. "That's great news. How far along?" he asked, tapping Dean on the back. "7 weeks, dude." Dean said, smirking. "OH GROSS! Dude, we were all sharing a motel room 7 weeks ago. "Wasn't in there." Ryder said, laughing at Sam's tone. "Where then?" Dean and Ryder exchanged a knowing look. "No way! Not the backseat of the Impala?" Dean stifled a laugh, but Ryder couldn't contain herself. "OH MAN!" Sam sat down, shaking his head. "I shotgun, shotgun forever." Sam said, looking from Ryder to Dean.

"So, where did you get to?" Ryder asked her father. He looked down into her uniquely coloured eyes, and sighed. "To visit an old friend." Ryder nodded, and went back to cleaning the preparation dishes. "Who?" she asked. "You don't know him." Dean kissed her cheek, and took Sam by the shirt. "Come on princess. I got something I wanna show you." Ryder looked at her dad and shrugged, "Wonder what it is?" she said, sitting next to her dad on the stools. "How did he take it?" Alan asked. Ryder nodded, a smile on her face. "Really well. Seems excited, you know." She said, slightly trailing off at the end. "I know about the deal, darlin'." Alan said, pulling Ryder into a hug. "Dean told me about it last night."

"Dad, what if I can't do this? What if I ruin the poor kid's life?" she asked, leaning her head on his shoulder. Alan rubbed her back, kissing her hair. "I think you'll do just fine." he whispered. Ryder's hands were on her tummy again, a habit that was slowly becoming normal to her. "It's hard to believe there's a little life in there." Ryder whispered, smiling brightly. "I know, but soon it'll start growing bigger, and you'll know kiddo's there." Ryder's eyes changed, a hint of sadness in them. "It's hard to be excited, when I know he's gonna miss out." Alan nodded, "Dean will never truly leave you. As long as you remember him, he'll always be with you." Alan tried his hardest to blink back his tears.

Dean entered the room again, without Sam. Ryder frowned, eyes full of worry. Dean shook his head and winked. "His fine." She nodded, and stood. "I'm gonna go lay down. I'm really tired." Alan kissed her cheek, "I'll send Dean in a couple of hours with dinner okay?" Ryder nodded, walking to Dean. "I'll come for a while." he said, taking her hand. Alan watched them leave the room, and sighed a breath of relief. Eyes releasing all the tears he'd been holding back. 'Be brave Alan.' came a familiar voice in his head. "I'm tryin' Ellie."

* * *

His final month, came around quickly. It was only two weeks away now, his fear had him up all night. He always felt sick, his stomach constantly churning. Sometimes it felt like it was him with the morning sickness. Ryder was nearly three months into the pregnancy, and starting to show the slightest bump. Dean felt the constant need to touch her, or her stomach, to have that closeness with his family. His family being his girlfriend and their child. Sammy was becoming distant, brooding all the time, never speaking unless spoken to. Ryder was similar, but whenever Dean mentioned the baby she would gush, making him forget his worries for a few minutes, basking in the glow of her hormones. Dean had his suspicions that the baby was a boy, he didn't know why. Most of his dreams had the same little boy in them.

Alan was always in his library reading, and writing notes. When asked what he was doing, they'd all get the same reply. "Oh, just some research." he'd say flatly. Ryder was worried about her father, thought that he was getting sick again. She never said that though, mostly kept it to herself. Dean has enough on his plate, she would say. It was as if he was made of glass, everyone was tip toeing around him, trying not to stress him out. He loved them all for doing it, but really just wanted them to act normal. Dean was coping well with his emotions, until this morning. When Bobby walked through the front door. Every little thing he'd kept bottled up spilled out, and he broke down infront of everyone. Sam was first to grab him when his knees went from under him, Ryder was on her knees infront of him, crying just as hard. Bobby was just standing there, silent tears falling down his face. Dean's arms were locked around Sammy and Ryder, his face buried in Ryder's long hair. "It's alright, baby. Let it out." she whispered, rubbing his back. Bobby moved around, a firm hand falling on the back of his head.

Bobby left the room, heading up to the library where Alan was. Leaving Dean with Sam and Ryder, he knew that he needed them more than anyone right now. He heard Dean's voice, a slight stutter in it. "I'm..so sorry." Ryder continued whispering in his ear, Sam just squatting there, eyes fixed on his brother. "Hey, come on now. You can't visit the doctor looking all sad." Ryder said, dipping her head to look into Dean's eyes. "What, doctor?" Sam asked. Dean sat on the floor, legs stretched out infront of him. "Ryder has an ultrasound, this afternoon." Dean said, his voice slightly croaky. Sam looked at Ryder's stomach, smiling slightly. "Your startin' to show, huh?" Sam said. Ryder smiled, "I am." Dean's hand was now resting over his eyes, he was trying to wipe any signs of his crying away. Ryder crawled forward, pulling his hand away. Uniquely coloured eyes locking with his green ones. Her hands fell onto his cheeks, "Don't hide your face from us. We don't care if you cry." she kissed his forehead, and stood. Leaving the room, so the boys could have their time.

Dean knew she was going to Bobby, he knew she needed him right now. Dean turned his attention on his brother, who was now staring at the floor. "Sammy, this isn't your fault." Dean whispered, leaning his back against the wall. Sam didn't say anything, he just sat next to Dean, mirroring his position. "Is it hard?" Sam asked. Dean frowned, turning to look at his brother. "Is what hard?" he asked. "Seeing her like that, knowing you won't be here 6 months from now." Dean nodded, "Yeah." he answered, eyes looking to the ceiling. "But I know you'll help her out." Sam chuckled and looked away. "What kinda uncle would I be if I didn't?" he said, looking down at his hands, long legs crossing infront of him. They sat in a comfortable silence, each feeling better just knowing the other was there. Though their hearts broke a little more, because of the pain, and the worry.

* * *

"Miss Singer. Dr. Louis is ready for you." the small receptionist called out. Ryder stood, grabbing Dean's hand. "Come on." she said, making her way across the small waiting room. Dean had felt a little uneasy, it wasn't the scariest part of the hospital, but it was still infact a hospital. Ryder squeezed his hand affectionately, turning to him. "I'm fine." he said, smiling warmly at her. "Your not. But you will be." she said, stepping into the small white room. "Good afternoon, Miss Singer. How are you feeling today?" came a warm female voice. "Oh, please just call me Ryder. I'm doing fine, just a little tired." The doctor smiled. She was a pretty woman, with short black hair, her eyes almost as dark shining out from under her glasses. "I can assure you that's very much normal." the doctor told her. "And you must be the father?" she asked, eyes falling on Dean. "Uh, yeah." he answered, looking away from all the medical equipment. "Dean, is it?" the doctor said, eyes lingering on his. He nodded. "You can call me Nicole." she said, smiling.

"I bet your wishing that bubs comes out with eyes like Daddy." Nicole said, placing Ryder's files back on the counter. Ryder smiled, "That's what I'm hoping for." Dean frowned at her, she'd always been a little negative about her eyes. Ryder was sitting up on a big white bed looking thing, that looked similar to a warped recliner chair. Dean was on a stool next to it, back leaning against the cold wall, one foot place firmly on the ground, the other up on the thin bar that ran between the legs of the stool. Ryder ruffled his hair, he looked up at her and winked. "Okay, I'll need you to put that on, just so we don't get your shirt all dirty." Ryder nodded, and took the white paper like shirt from the doctor. After unbuttoning her shirt, she slid it off her shoulders and pulled the other one on. Ryder laid against the hard matress, facing the machines.

"What's wrong, Dean?" Nicole asked, squirting a large amount of gel on Ryder's stomach. "I don't like hospitals." he answered quietly. She smiled down at him, and picked up the wand, pressing it on Ryder's stomach. Dean's eyes widened, 'Won't that hurt the kid?' he thought. "Relax. It wont hurt the baby." Nicole said, laughing at Dean's face. "Oh okay." he said, quietly sitting a little closer to Ryder. "Why do you hate hospital's?" Dean rested his forearms against the the bed Ryder was on. "Just don't. Never have." He answered, eyes searching the screen. The doctor was looking also, smiling when she spotted it. "There you go." She zoomed in on the spot, and pointing. "There's your baby." she said, looking back at them. Dean sat forward looking closer, "Kinda looks like a Peanut M&M." he said, a small frown on his face. Ryder giggled, "That's all he eats." she told the doctor. "When I first found out he was callin' the poor thing a coffee bean." Dean chuckled.

His hand grabbing Ryder's, eyes stuck on the screen. "Everything seems to be going to plan." Nicole told them. She wiped the gel off Ryder's stomach, looking over to Dean. "You alright?" she asked. He nodded slowly, "Just never really thought about how small we start out." he said, pulling his eyes off the image. Ryder changed her shirt back, and sat up. The doctor did a couple of small tests, mostly just checking Ryder's blood pressue. "There ya go." she handed Dean a small photo. He looked down, and saw the small speck that was his child. "Thanks." he whispered, as he followed Ryder out of the room. "Not so bad, was it?" he said, his arm wrapping around Ryder's shoulders. "Nope. Not bad at all." They giggled, and he leant down, kissing her softly on the lips. "I love you." he said, as they walked out of the small part of the hospital.

* * *

Sam sat alone in the dark library, reading a book. But this wasn't just any book, this was a Journal, Dean's journal. In it was every year from the date Sam left for college to the day that Sam had recieved it. All of it showing just how much he didn't know. Dean poured all of his emotions onto the pages of this book, all this time Sam had assumed that Dean had just simply bottled it up. Most of the contents of this journal had nothing to do with the supernatural, this was Dean's views on reality. His life, his love and his family. Sam, felt that he truly knew Dean now. Sam read the date at the top of the page, a smile crossed his face.

'April 20th, 2007'  
Another town, another job, another day with the guilt of Dad's death on my shoulders. This job isn't too hard though, the scenery is nice. "God Dean." Sam said to himself. I met a girl today, she's not scared to argue you point. She's put me in my place a couple of times, the mere 2 hours I've known her. For once, she's not a waitress. She studying to be a nurse or doctor or something. She's gorgeous too, suprisingly I haven't hit on her yet. If I did she'd probably punch me in the balls. "Wouldn't be surprised." Sam said. Sam is still tryin' to get me to talk about Dad, I wish he'd drop it. I don't wanna tell him the truth. "But ya did."

Sam closed the book and rested it on his knee. His head fell against the back of his seat, his mind going a thousand miles a minute. There was absolutely nothing he could do to save his brother. His hero would be gone in two weeks time, and there wasn't a damn thing he could do. His brother had pretty much raised him, taught him how to speak, how to walk, how to stick up for himself. Sam sighed, his brooding interupted by footsteps in the hallway.

"Hey. How'd it go?" Sam asked, looking up to see Dean walking into the living room, hands stuffed in his jacket pockets. "Everything's going as it should be." Dean answered, sitting down on the couch. "You go in with her?" Sam asked, looking across to his brother. "Yup. Here." Dean passed Sam the picture the doctor had given him. "I can only imagine what you said." Sam said, suddenly laughing. Dean laughed too. "I said it looked like a Peanut M&M." Sam shook his head. "I knew it." Dean sobered, looking at the picture in his brother's hands. "Man, I have a kid on the way. How strange is that?" Sam nodded, handing back the picture. "Very." Sam answered. Dean looked at the picture, then returned it to his pocket, shuffling down in the seat. His legs wide open, one leg bouncing. "Nervous?" Sam asked, his smile falling away. Dean nodded, not saying anything, he didn't need to. They all knew why he was nervous.

"Do you think the kid in my dreams is what the baby's gonna look like?" Dean asked, turning his head towards Sam. "Maybe. We'll just have to wait and see." Dean sighed and looked away. Sam silently cursed himself. "I'm sorry." Sam said, quietly. "It's not your fault." Dean said, scratching his head. "Man, you need a haircut." Sam said, shaking his head. Dean frowned, and ran his fingers through it. "Now that's the pot callin' the kettle black." Dean said laughing. They sat there giggling for a while, Sam's heart was a little lighter. "Where's Ryder?" Sam asked. Dean pointed to the ceiling. "Catchin' up on her beauty sleep. Mornin' sickness has her up at the crack of dawn." Dean drawled. "And you sleep through it?" Sam said, his voice sounding surprised. "Sometimes. Othertimes, I go hold her hair back." Sam laughed. "I'd love to see that."

* * *

Dean's eyes fluttered open, the first thing he saw was Ryder still sleeping. He turned to the clock and saw the time. 'She's probably been up already.' he thought to himself. He moved closer to her, his chest pressed against her back. His hand came to rest on her stomach, rubbing the small bump. Today was going to be hard, today was his last day, and deep down inside he was having small panic attacks, but outside he was being strong. At least he was trying to. He buried his face into Ryder's soft naked skin, arms wrapped around her protectively. Ryder had been forcing up a front, pretending she was unaffected, but once they were alone she would break down. She'd cling to him like her life depended on it, and it killed him to know it was him that caused her this pain.

He sighed, knowing this would be the last time he felt her skin against his. That this was the last time his hand would fall protectively over his unborn child. Last night was the last time he would ever make love to her, and the last time he'd ever have her to himself. Small tears fought their way from his eyes, falling upon Ryder's naked back and rolling down. He remembered their last proper conversation, sobbing quietly as each word came rushing through his head. "Ryder when I leave here tomorrow, promise me you wont follow me." The look in her eyes had broken his heart, she shook her head and pushed his arm off him. "Dean your not going to go die alone." she said, her voice was sad.

"Ryder, I've seen what happens to people when that thing comes for them. Your not gonna watch it happen to me." He grabbed her cheeks and made her look him in the eyes, "I don't want you to remember me that way." Ryder's eyes closed and she felt her head fall in his hands, she nodded slowly. He pulled her into his arms, and kissed her cheek. "Thank you." she whispered, softly. "For what?" Dean asked, brushing her hair from her face. "For this." Ryder looked down, hands falling to her small belly. Dean smiled, "No, thank you." he said, remembering their conversation in the diner.

Dean found himself looking into those beautiful eyes, his hand brushing long dark hair behind her ear. He took in every detail of her eyes, every last detail of her face. He didn't want to forget her, he didn't want to forget what they had. He brushed away her tears with his thumbs, "Don't make me remember your eyes with tears in them." he whispered, "You know how I feel about your cryin'." Ryder looked away sadly, eyes falling on the door. "You better spend the day with Sam." Her eyes fell on him again, no longer showing her sadness. What he saw when he looked into them was love. Her brown eye sparkling just a little less bright than her hazel one. Dean loved the way her eyes did that.

"Yeah." Dean said, making no move to get up. Ryder took in a deep shakey breath, her finger coming up to trace his lips. She leaned up and kissed him, it was a deep kiss, full of emotion. Causing Dean to fall onto his back, Ryder falling with him, his hand had been tangled through her hair. "If it's a boy. I'm going to name him after you." Ryder whispered, into his ear. Dean nodded, a small smile on his lips. "What if it's a girl?" he asked, feeling strange they had never really spoken about names. "Ellie. My mother's name. It was short for Elizabeth, weird huh?" Dean shook his head. "Ellie is better than Lizzie." Dean said laughing. Ryder sat up, pulling the sheet over her breasts. "Elizabeth Mary, if it's a girl. Dean Jackson, if it's a boy."

She saw Dean's wide smile after she'd mentioned his mother's name. "I thought it rolled off the tongue well." she said, in her ususal smart ass tone. "Well, your the boss." he said, sitting up. "You know it." she said, getting up slowly. "Feel sick?" Dean asked, rubbing her back. Ryder nodded. "Great. Not only is it the worst day ever. I feel just as bad as it is." she told him. Stepping into a pair of black tracksuit pants, pulling a white long sleeved shirt over her head. "Well, I know this wont take away everything. But I figured since you gave me this." Dean said, waving his left hand in her face. "That I'd give you this." He handed her a tiny silver ring. It looked just like his one, and Ryder just stared at it.

Dean chuckled and picked it up again. Taking her left hand in his right, he slid the small ring onto her left ring finger. He leant forward and kissed her forehead, "That's something I never saw on you in my dreams." he whispered, leaving the bedroom. Ryder watched him leave, smiling at his gesture.

* * *

Dean walked into the kitchen to find Sam sleeping on the kitchen table, pieces of paper sprawled around him. "Sammy." Dean said, his big brother voice coming out. Sam jumped, and looked around, eyes falling on Dean. Puffy-red bloodshot eyes. Sam had been crying, for a long period of time too. "I tried Dean. I tried so hard, but there's nothing. I can't save you." Sam said, eyes welling up with tears. Dean stood still, it felt as if he'd been glued to the spot. The last time he'd seen Sammy like this, was when their dad had died. "It's okay, Sammy. We weren't supposed to find a way." Sam was leaning his elbows on the table, hands holding his hair out of his face. "Dean, how can you be so calm? After tonight that's it. I'm alone, my whole family will have been taken from me by Demons."

Dean stepped forward, taking the seat next to Sam. "I'm not calm. But I know I can't stop it, so I gotta face it. I made my bed Sammy, now I gotta lay in it." Dean said, his voice cracking as he spoke. His big eyes threatening to spill tears. "We have to lay in it too. I lose my brother, Ryder loses her partner, the baby loses it father. Everyone is losing someone when to walk out of that door tonight." Sam said, his voice broken. That was all Sam needed to say, the tears that had filled Dean's eyes spilled, and he pulled his brother into a tight hug. Sam returned it, grabbing a handful of Dean's shirt.

Dean pulled away, turning his face away. He stared down at his hands, playing with the ring around his left ring finger. "You know? When you were born I thought you were a new toy at first. Mom used to have to keep reminding me that you were a real baby. I thought you were a doll, all you did was sleep." Sam looked at Dean, his eyes as wide as saucers. Dean had mentioned their mother without a single pause. "She, uh, taught me everything I know about takin' care of you. I used to help out all the time." Sam nodded, "You'd be a good dad." he told Dean, who lifted an eyebrow at Sam. "You taught me everything I know. You took care of me, when you coulda been out with friends, or havin' a life of your own. But you stayed with me, you sacrificed everything for me. To me, that's a father."

"Quit talkin' about me. I was tryin' to tell you about Mom." Dean said, a smirk on his face. "You were tellin' me about you." Sam said, smiling at his brother's discomfort. "You were my job, Sammy. That's why I gave up everything. Cause it was my job to take care of you, lord knows Dad had no hope." Dean said, smiling at the memory of his father. "Dad never did know what to do with me, did he?" Sam said, pulling all the papers towards him. "Nope. You were stubborn from a young age." Sam shook his head. "Dad just wasn't very nurturing." Sam told Dean seriously. "You were." A tear fell down Dean's cheek, he wanted so bad to be able to watch his child grow up.

Dean took of his necklace, placing it on the table infront of him, removed his watch, his thick silver ring and bracelets. He pulled the keys for the Impala out of his jacket pocket, and pushed them to Sam. "You decide you gets those." Sam looked down, frowning. He looked up and nodded. "What about that ring?" Sam asked pointing to Dean's left. "This one goes with me." Dean said, looking down at it. Sam understood, and nodded. "Have you spoken to Alan?" Sam asked, facing Dean properly. "Nah, he went out. He didn't want to see Ryder tonight, I don't blame him." Dean said. "Said goodbye last night though." Dean said, a little too casually for his own liking. Sam's big hand patted Dean's back, they didn't really know what else to say to eachother. So, they sat there, burning with the pain of leaving eachother, tears falling silently from both.

* * *

At 11.30pm, Dean pulled on a hooded jumper, pulling his brown leather jacket over the top. He took one last look around the room he'd lived in for the past month and let out a shaky breath. He turned, and walked slowly down the stairs. Ryder caught his eye, she was at the bottom, leaning against the wall, her left foot up against the wall. One look at her told him that she was close to breaking. Their eyes met, and they both let out a shaky breath. Sam had given her Dean's necklace, he could see the leather rope poking out at the back of her neck. Once Dean had stepped off the bottom step, Ryder took a slow step towards him. Eyes taking in every single part of him. She bit her bottom lip, to stop it from trembling. She took his hand, and squeezed it her tears falling now, she wasn't scared to show her pain. She couldn't anymore, Dean could tell.

Dean pulled her into his arms, looking out of the window behind her. He brokedown he couldn't do this, no way could he do this with dry eyes, and a straight-face. He pulled her closer, his cheek leaning hard against the top of her head. Ryder was trembling, her hands grabbing his jacket, "Don't do this. Please, Dean stay with me." she sobbed. Dean closed his eyes, his body shaking from the tears. "I can't." he choked. His hand tangled itself in her hair, tears soaking his cheeks. "Please don't do this alone." she whispered. Dean shook his head, "I have to. I don't want you or Sam to see me like that." Ryder leaned her head back, looking up at him. He leaned down, and kissed her. He kissed her with everything he had inside of him. They broke apart, and he saw Sam standing in the doorway of the living room.

Dean turned and walked up to his baby brother, pulling him into a tight bear hug. Hands grabbing his shirt, "Don't get into trouble." Dean told him, trying to sound normal. "Take care of them." He whispered. "You know I will." Sam whispered. Dean looked his brother in the eyes, and nodded, Sam nodded back. Dean pulled open the front door, and walked out, clicking it shut behind him. He walked across the dark property, up into all the trees. He sat on a bench that was surrounding but bushes and trees, and let go. Sobbing uncontrollably, sitting back against the cold conrete backing. 15 minutes left, he thought to himself. His head fell back, and he let the cold air assault him.

* * *

As soon as the door clicked shut, the stereo in the living room clicked on. A familiar song to both Sam and Ryder began to play, they both looked into the room. Ryder stepped slowly into the room, eyes darting around. The memories of her first date with Dean all hit her at once, causing her eyes to snap shut.

'So close no matter how far  
Couldn't be much more from the heart  
Forever trusting who we are  
And nothing else matters'

Sam rushed to her side, "Hey, Ry. What's wrong?" he asked hands falling on her shoulder's. She started shaking her head. 'Dean was standing infront of her, eyes full of life. A red Mustang behind him.' She turned her head away, tears spilling from her eyes. "STOP IT!" she yelled. Only to have more memories rush to her.

'Never opened myself this way  
Life is ours, we live it our way  
All these words I don't just say  
And nothing else matters'

'They were up against a wall, kissing as if their lives depended on it. His hands all over her, her mouth all over his neck.' She sobbed loudly, her knees giving out underneath her. "Ryder! What's happening?" Sam said, eyes searching her face. "Make it stop, Sammy." she cried. He didn't know what to do. The music was playing, but the stereo was switched off. He pulled her into a hug, crying with her.

'Trust I seek and I find in you  
Every day for us something new  
Open mind for a different view  
And nothing else matters'

"Dean.." she whispered, as the song cut out, holding onto Sam so tightly it was almost like she'd die if she let him go. Sam ran a hand from the top of her head, along her the back of her head. "I know." he said, as he helped her stand, helping her up to her bedroom. Neither would sleep that night, but they could be comfortable.

------

A song started playing, a song that meant alot to him. His eyes widened, and he looked around. "Where's it comin' from?" he said outloud. Memories all coming back to him just like a flood. His eyes snapped shut. 'Ryder stood before him, short hair framing her face.' He bared his teeth and took a shaky breath.

'So close no matter how far  
Couldn't be much more from the heart  
Forever trusting who we are  
And nothing else matters'

Dean lied down on the bench, his head was throbbing. 'Ryder pushed up against him, a wall keeping them from falling to the floor, his heartpounding in his chest. A kiss so hard he could almost feel it.' Dean crossed his arms over his chest, in a weak attempt to prevent the trembling.

'Never opened myself this way  
Life is ours, we live it our way  
All these words I don't just say  
And nothing else matters'

"STOP IT!" he yelled, voice hard and angry. 'Ryder's eyes, staring into his, a small sparkle in them. A glint of happiness, true happiness. Her beautiful smile clouded his mind.' Dean's body stopped trembling, his heart beating so quick he thought he was having a heartattack. Suddenly everything went black, the face of the little boy from his dreams came into view.

'Trust I seek and I find in you  
Every day for us something new  
Open mind for a different view  
And nothing else matters'

One single tear fell from his closed eyes. His breathing slowly evened out, and his body grew cold.


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: i want to take the time and thank everyone that reviewed, when i seen the lil lonely # 1 next to review, it made our day and everyone who added this wonderful story to there favorite list and mz. ashleigh to their favorite author's list. thank you soooo much XD and thank you everyone that took the time to read it.**

**xoxo **

**BeMyEscapeSupernatural**

* * *

Ryder sat on the window ledge, staring out into the clear morning sky. Her tears had finally stopped, not because she wasn't sad anymore, but because she'd cried herself out of tears. Her head fell against the window, fingers touching the cold glass. She hated the fact that she was here, and he wasn't. She hadn't slept at all, the thought of him not being with her to much for her to handle. She let out a long shy, turning to see Sam's tall frame sleeping where Dean had only the day before. She closed her eyes, his beautiful face coming to her. That cocky grin that had always driven her crazy making her miss him more. She turned back to the window, her eyes falling on the trees in the distance. "Looks like we're on our own now, baby." she whispered, a hand rubbing her small round belly.

She stood, and pulled on her jacket, leaving Sam alone in the room. Slowly walking along the silent hallway, hand running along the strong walls as she went. She knew now that she wasn't dreaming, Dean was infact gone, and she was here alone. She stepped down the stairs quietly, not wanting to wake Sam. He'd stop her if he knew what she was doing. Her left hand fell on the door handle, the small silver ring shining in the dull sunlight. She pulled the door open and stepped out, the warm morning air surrounding her. She unconciously pulled her jacket around her, not particularly cold, but she was a little scared. She walked slowly, taking it one step at a time. The wind blew her hair around behind her, as she walked the sunlight beating down on the green grass around her.

She stopped when she reached the small woods at the back of her father's property. "Oh god. What am I doin'?" she asked herself, as she took a step into the trees. She walked through them, eyes searching for him, any little sign of him. She didn't care how he looked, she just wanted to see him. She had to know for sure that he was gone. She pushed through a bush, coming into a small clearing, she could no longer see the house, and felt totally alone. Her eyes fell on a bench, she stared at it for a second then turned away. Something registered in her head, and she spun around. Her eyes falling on a booted foot. "Dean.." she whispered. She ran around the bench, stopping when her eyes saw him. Her heart pounding in her chest, she searched for any sign that he was alive.

He was perfect, not a mark on him. Not one hair out of place, not one torn shread of clothing. Nothing. He just looked as if he was sleeping. His handsome face looking so peaceful. She knelt down and moved closer to him, eyes searching his body. Her hand came to rest on his stomach, her eyes opened wide when she found he was still warm. Her eyes darted to his chest, she saw it slowly rise and fall, and she fell backwards onto her butt. Her staring at him, full of confusion. She moved closer again, her head leaning against his chest. The sound of his heart beating made it's way to her ear. Her breath caught in her chest. She pulled herself up onto the bench, face inches away from his. "Dean.." she called softly. He didn't move. She frowned and brought her hand up to his face. "Dean, sweety wake up." she said, slapping his cheek softly. He stirred, but stayed silent.

She looked around her, looking for a way to wake him up. She hated having to do this to him, knowing it would remind him of his father, but she knew he would respond to the way her voice would sound. "Dean WINCHESTER! Wake up right now, THAT'S AN ORDER!" she yelled, her voice strong and stern. His brow crinkled and his eyes snapped open. Looking around him, his face just as confused as she had been only minutes before. "Ryder?" he whispered, sitting up slowly. She nodded, letting him pull her into his arms. She heard him take a deep breath. "Dean, your trembling." she whispered, leaning back taking his face into her hands. "I don't understand." he whispered, eyes never looking into her. "Did you?" he asked, she shook her head as he looked at her. "Did Sam?" she shook her head. "Then how am I still here?" he said, finally looking into her eyes. "I don't know." she whispered. "But you are." He stared at her, as if eyes falling on her for the first time. She looked so tired, but still so beautiful. "Did you sleep at all?" he asked, still staring at her. "I couldn't. Sam did." she told him. "Dean, are you really here?" she whispered. He nodded, "Yeah. I'm still here."

* * *

Alan sat alone in the dark motel room, staring at the wall infront of him. He couldn't stay at his house last night, he didn't want to see everyone. How could he face them, knowing what he knew. He scrubbed his face and looked at his watch. A small smile making it's way onto his face. He knew they would be confused, but he had to keep the truth from them. It was the only way this would happen, the only way it would work. Alan sighed, he knew this wasn't going to be fun, but he had to do it. Two weeks ago, he left his house, with one job. His final job. He had rode his motorbike to the place that held the only thing that would save Dean. Alan, had gone to the crossroads.

He remembered the eerie feeling he had as soon as he'd gotten there. He tried to imagine how many other desperate men had come here to solve their problems. He hadn't come here to solve his own problems, he'd come here to save a life. To save the life of the man who loved his daughter, the man who was her everything. The only person that would be able to protect her from the pain that was her life. He sighed as he remembered the demon coming to him, her evil red eyes staring into his soul. He shivvered as her cold words rushed back to his mind.

-Flashback-

"Well, if it isn't Alan O'Shay? To what do I owe this honour?" she said, her voice cold and creepy. Alan frowned as she stepped into view. Of course, he thought, as he laid his eyes upon his lost love. "Like the look? It's vintage." she said, smiling wickedly at him. "Cut the crap." Alan drawled. "Let's talk business." He stood his ground firmly, eyes staring into her blood red ones. "What is it you want?" she asked, sounding slightly bored. "I want to make a deal. My life instead of Dean's." he said, head held high. The demon laughed, "And why would I do that?" she said. Alan now smiled wickedly. "Cause, I'm the only hunter who knows how to finish ya for good." he drawled, walking around the stunned demon. "So if you do take him. I'm gonna come and finish ya for breakin' my daughter's heart." He stopped infront of her, arms crossed over his chest. "You are just as smug as he was." she whispered, eyes darting up to his face.

"Do we have a deal?" Alan said, lifting an eyebrow. The demon huffed, her face screwed into an angry frown. "Fine." she snapped. "But we do this on my terms. You don't utter a word to him, or your precious daughter. If you do, deals off and baby makes two." Alan's eyes widened, "You'll kill the baby?" he asked. The demon laughed, nodding her head. "I'll come for you when your least expecting it, but I'm gonna make sure you hurt really, really bad. I think I'm gonna have some fun with you. Make your death, nice and slow. Do we have a deal?" she said, brushing up against him. Alan's eyes stared off into the distance, Ryder's happiness was well worth the suffering. He nodded, and looked at her. "Deal." She pulled him into a kiss, and disappeared.

-End Flashback-

Alan grabbed his jacket, and walked out of the room. It was time for him to go back to his home. To act surprised when he sees Dean, and to begin his own countdown, although he didn't know when exactly his ended.

* * *

"RYDER!" came Sam's worried voice, as she helped Dean walk back to the house. Sam was around the other side of the house, Ryder was too shocked to speak, she just held Dean's arm around her neck, her arm around his middle. Dean was still trembling, and his legs were too wobbly for him to walk straight. He stopped and Ryder looked up to him. "We have to get you inside, your freezing." she whispered. He looked down at her, eyes unfocused. Dean was definately in shock. "RY!" Sam said, as he came around the corner, stopping mid step. His eyes had fallen on Dean, standing there staring at the floor. "Sammy, help me." Ryder called. Sam rushed to them, grabbing Dean's other arm. They walked him slowly into the house, and into the living room. Sam ran to get a blanket from upstairs, Ryder sat next to him. Her jacket fell open and Dean's eyes fell on her stomach. "Looks like I'm gonna be here afterall." Dean said, a shaky hand falling on her stomach.

"Looks like." she whispered, her forehead leaning on his cheek. Dean smiled, and held her tightly. Sam came in wrapping a heavy blanket around Dean, and sitting on the floor infront of him. "How?" Sam asked, eyes glued on Dean's face. "I don't know." Dean said, taking a shaky breath. Ryder stood and walked to the door. "Coffee?" she asked, Dean nodded. She screwed her nose up and walked away. She hated the smell of coffee, she hated it even more now she was pregnant. Sam sat staring at his brother, secretly thanking whoever had saved him. Sam stuck his hand into his pocket, pulling out a small plastic bag. He handed it up to Dean and smiled. "I don't think I'll be needing these." Dean closed his hand around the small bag, a smile on his face. He pulled the blanket around him tighter, trying his best to warm up.

A few minutes later, Ryder returned with a steaming cup of coffee in her hands, her nose still a little scrunched up. Dean sat forward and took it from her hands. "Thank you." he said, as she sat on the couch next to him. She smiled warmly at him and pulled her hands up into the sleeves of her jacket, fingers holding onto the hem. She looked as lost as Sam did. It was obvious that neither of them had done this. He put his mug down on the table next to the couch, and looked at them both. "You two look horrible." he said, a smirk on his face. "Shut up." Sam snapped. Ryder laughed at the two boys, already bickering with eachother. She leaned against Dean's shoulder, his body was still cold, but she didn't care. She was too damn tired to care. She closed her eyes, breathing in his scent. A mix of cologne, sweat and leather, a smell Ryder had grown to depend on. A smell that always meant that Dean was there, and still breathing. A smell, she hoped she would breath in forever.

She felt an arm wrap around her, and pull her back against the couch. Dean's warm breath brushing over her cheek. She was too tired to talk, she just needed him to hold her. Just needed him to touch her, feel his body near hers. She just needed to know that he was here, and that he wasn't leaving her. She heard his voice speaking softly to Sam, his arms arms tightening a little around her. She slowly drifted off to sleep in his tight embrace, with the tiniest of smiles on her face, they were a family again. Sam had his brother still. Ryder had her lover. Her child had it's father. Nothing could take this happiness away from her. Someone had been listening to her silent prayers.

* * *

Sam had decided to leave Dean and Ryder. They were both asleep anyway, and he needed to be alone to get his head around what had just happened. Dean had walked out of his life the night before, and straight back into it this morning. Sam was grateful to have his big brother back, but was curious to know how. Sam was pacing in the hallway, stopping every now and then to look at his brother, to make he was still breathing. What if the demon was just playing with him? What if it took him during the night?

Sam jumped when he heard the front door close behind him. He turned to find Alan standing infront of the door. "Sam. Are you okay, son?" the older man asked. Sam nodded, head turning back into the living room. Alan stepped forward and followed Sam's gaze, eyes falling on the young couple cuddled up on the couch. "How?" Alan asked, his voice slightly higher. Sam shook his head, "No idea." Alan's hand patted Sam on the back, and he walked quietly into the living room.

"She didn't stress herself too much last night, did she?" Alan asked, southern accent stronger than usual. "A little, but she tried to be calm. I don't blame her for not bein' able too." Sam whispered, coming to stand next to Alan. A week ago, Alan had expressed his fears about the amount of stress Ryder had on her at the moment, he knew that it couldn't be good for the baby. "She didn't complain about anything last night?" Sam shook his head, "No, just cried." Alan nodded, leaning forward and kissing the top of Ryder's head.

"How was he?" Alan asked, looking at Dean. "He was sorta shocked. Didn't talk much at first, was trembling pretty bad." Alan nodded, understanding what the boy could have went through. "He was probably cold, he'd been out there all night. Might be warm here durin' the day, but nights are damn cold. Surprised he wasn't worse." Sam's mouth fell open, and he moved a little closer. "Leave him. Sleepin' will do him good."

Both men left the room, heading up to the library to talk about the events of this morning. Both taking one last look at the two sleeping forms before heading upstairs.

* * *

Dean woke up at around 4, Ryder was still laying with him. It was obvious she'd been awake for a while, her eyes were wide open. Dean ran his hand through her hair, smiling as she looked up at him. "Hey you." he whispered softly. She smiled back at him, eyes sparkling. "Hey yourself." she whispered back. A book slipped off his stomach, and Ryder giggled. "What have you been reading, huh?" he said quietly, leaning over to pick it up off the floor. He looked at the cover, a large yawn escaping his lips.

"Pregnancy book." she said softly. "Cause I have no idea, what I'm doin'." Dean put the book back down on his stomach, and looked at her. "I have some idea." Ryder's eyebrow shot up, and Dean felt he needed to explain himself quick. "I took care of Sammy when he was a baby. My mom taught me a few things." Ryder smiled up at him, flicking her head. He leaned down and kissed her softly, a smile on his lips. "What?" she whispered, laughing softly. Dean took her face in, his green eyes glowing softly. "Nothin'." He kissed her again, this time she smiled.

"See this is how babies are made." she said, as she pulled away. Dean laughed and hugged her tight. "I had another dream." he said, a frown on his face. Ryder looked worried, "Was it like the others?" she asked, hesitantly. He shook his head, a small smile on his face. "Naw nothin' like that." He pulled her close, and told her about his dream. Not once did the smile leave his face. Because this time, when he spoke to the little boy, his girlfriend could see him too.

"So you were there this time? Like not dead, but actually there?" Ryder asked him. He nodded and she pounced on him. "OHH! Thank god!" she said, squeezing her arms around his neck. Dean laughed, his head leaning back so he could see her smile. "I like it when you smile like that." he told her, his fingers brushing her cheek. She looked into his eyes, "I like you." she said, a goofy grin on her face. "Well, I hope you do. Your kinda carryin' my kid around." he said, laughing at her remark.

"DEAN..RYDER! FOOD NOW!" Sam called from the kitchen. They looked at eachother, laughing quietly. "Dad has spoken." Ryder joked.

* * *

TWO WEEKS LATER..

The boys had gone for a hunt in Arizona, Dean had not wanted to leave Ryder back in Texas, so she had tagged along. Her tummy was getting a little bigger, and she was beginning to get the oddest cravings. Cravings that would make even her own eyebrow raise in confusion. She was sitting in the Impala with Sam, waiting for Dean to return from inside the office building. She was excited, knowing after this hunt she was finally returning to the comforts of her own home. Her own bed, and her own bath.

A few minutes later, Dean emerged from the office, loosening his tie. He pulled the car door open and got it. "Okay, so the dead guys wife lives just across town. Thing is, we can't get in to see her." Ryder leaned forward between them. "Sure we can." she said, a small smile on her face. Throwing the local newspaper at Dean. "There's a house for rent in her town, her names in the real estate ad. We could act like a concerned married couple lookin' for the perfect place to have our baby." she laughed as he shook his head. "How do you come up with this sh*t?" he asked.

"I'm just talented." she said, bluntly. She sat back, smiling proudly. They drove back to their motel room, Ryder having to change to look the part of a pregnent rich woman. Dean just wore what he already had on. "So, you think you can play a concerned parent?" Sam asked, pulling his laptop onto the tabletop. Dean drummed his fingers on the table and smiled, "Yeah. No trouble." It would have been an understatement to say that Dean was a little protective. Sam had found it entertaining, the way Dean would ask Ryder a bunch of questions every now and then.

The bathroom door opened and Ryder strolled out, Sam's lips curled into a smile. "Definately lookin' the part." he said. Dean turned around his eyes falling on his pregnant girlfriend. "Woah." he said, eyes wide. Ryder smiled, standing there her long hair pulled up into a neat ponytail, her fringe neatly sitting on her forehead. She was wearing a woman's business suit, small heels on her feet. Her small belly poking out of her open jacket. "Not too much?" she asked, knowing neither man would lie to her. Both men shook their heads.

Dean stood and walked over to her. "You got me feelin' like I'm under dressed." he told her, his hand coming to rest on her lower back. "I take it that's a good thing." she shot back, pulling the door open. "Later Sam." she called from the door. "Have fun children." he called back laughing. Dean walked her to her side of the car, opening her door for her. "Your funny." she said softly, as she sat down and swung her legs into the car. "I aim to please." he said, walking around to his side of the car.

A few minutes later, Ryder found herself outside a rather huge house. To see the roof she had to tilt her head all the way back, her hand above her eyes to block the sun. "Man, people actually buy things like that." she drawled, looking at Dean through big black sunglasses. He nodded, his eyebrows raised high. "Looks like." he said, pushing his sunglasses down over his eyes. "Man it's bright." he said, looking at the white house.

"Mr and Mrs Hills, is it?" came a young woman's voice. Dean turned and switching on his million dollar smile. "That's us." he said, his arm coming around Ryder's waist. "I'm Laura Johnson, I'll be showing you around the house." the young woman said, holding her hand out. Dean shook it and smiled. "Nice to meet you Ms. Johnson." Dean said, politely. "I'm guessing newlyweds?" Ryder looked up at Dean, a huge smile on her lips. "Yes." she said, moving a little closer to him. "That's lovely." the woman said, heading towards the house. "Ry, isn't that the vics wife?" Ryder nodded. "Oh snap." Dean said, taking her hand in his. As they followed the woman, she kept quiet, only speaking when asked a question.

"So, Ms. Johnson you live in the area?" Dean asked, casually as he strolled around the large entrance room. The woman smiled at him politely. "Yes. I do." she answered, brightly. Dean looked over at her, lifting his sunglasses from his eyes, holding them in his hand. "Nice." he said, stepping into the next room. "Oh, Dean honey. Look how big this place is!" Ryder said, using a rather feminine voice. "I know." he answered, enthusiastically. Laura had followed them in, eyes a little sad. "Is this a safe area to live?" Ryder asked, turning to the small woman. "We are expecting our first child in a few months. We just want to find a safe place to bring the little guy up in." Laura's eyes fell on Ryder's tummy. "Oh, we have your usual things. Nothing too bad though." Ms. Johnson said, hesitantly.

Dean smiled at her and tilted his head forward. "Now your not lying to us, are you?" he drawled. The woman looked uncomfortably out of the window. Sighing, she turned at looked at the happy couple infront of her. Ryder's small bump making her desperate to tell them. "We've had 5 separate murders in the past week." she said, eyes looking from Dean to Ryder. Ryder brought her hand up to her mouth, looking up to Dean. Dean fought down a laugh and looked back at Ryder. "It's okay." he said softly. "Did they catch the guy?" Ms. Johnson shook her head. "Not even a fingerprint to work with." she said, a small sob escaping her lips. "What's wrong?" Ryder asked, stepping forward. "My husband." she said, looking over Ryder's shoulder at Dean. "What?" Ryder whispered softly. "My husband was the first." she said, tears falling down her cheeks. Ryder pulled her into a hug, rubbing her back.

"Oh sweety. What are you doing at work?" Ryder said, looking at Dean in the reflection in the window. "I can't stay in that house all day. Knowing he died there." the woman whispered. Ryder's eyes widened. "He died in your home? Were you there?" she asked. Ms. Johnson nodded. "Oh, you poor woman. Did you see his face?" The woman nodded, her face suddenly pale. Dean stepped forward, "Have you told the police?" he asked, a corncerned look on his face. She shook her head. "They'd never believe me." she said, stepping back from Ryder, cleaning up her appearance. "Because, there's no such thing as ghosts." she said.

* * *

They watched the woman leave, turning to her house. Both wearing their sunglasses again. Dean went to the trunk of the Impala, pulling out a small bag throwing it over his shoulder. "Anyone watchin'?" he asked, coming up behind Ryder. "That would be a negative." she said, turning to him. They snuck into the yard, walking quickly to the house. Dean picked the locked carefully, and led her in. Eyes scanning the large house for any sign of something weird. "Dude, this lady cleans like everyday or somethin'." he said, sliding a gloved finger over the dining room table. "Well, when you have kids, you have to." Ryder answered, flashing her flashlight in his face. Dean's hand came up to his eyes, and he turned around.

Ryder walked into a small den, she stepped around slowly. Searching every bit of the room, the small scanner in her hand going crazy as she stepped behind the desk. She knelt down on the floor, crawling under the desk. She frowned, "There's nothin' here." she whispered. She slowly got back up, and turned around, coming face to face with an old man. "Hello.." he said, his voice soft and creepy. She stepped around then desk, and walked backwards towards the door. Dean had the only gun and he was three rooms over. The man followed her, walking through every bit of furniture. "Don't be scared. This wont hurt a bit." he said, a wicked grin on his pale face. Ryder turned her head a little, she could see Dean in the doorway of the next room. Just as she turned to walk out, Dean turned to face her. 'Help.' she mouthed.

"Tsk..Tsk.." the old man said, clapping his hands together. The doors slammed shut between Dean and Ryder. Each pounding against it. "DEAN!" Ryder screamed, banging her hands on the door. "HELP!" she cried. "He can't save you now." the man said, pulling his hands towards him. Ryder flew across the floor, her back hitting a heavy armchair. She grunted, her eyes stuck on the figure infront of her. She crawled away, pulling herself up against the desk. "RYDER!!!!" Dean was angry, she could hear it in his voice. Her eyes darted to the door. The old man laughed, and pulled his arms towards him, Ryder unwillingly walked towards the man. "This wont hurt at all." he whispered into her ear. A tear fell down her cheek, and she clamped her eyes shut.

---

"Damn it!" Dean yelled, throwing his weight against the door. Leaning against it heavily, he couldn't get into the room. He knew he had to though, two lives were depending on him. He turned taking a few steps back, he pulled his leg up and kicked the door harder than the last, the double doors flew open. "Dean!" Ryder called, the ghost turned to him, throwing Ryder into the desk, her head hitting the corner. Dean pulled his gun up and pointed it up at the ghost. "I don't think so." he said, calmly eyes falling on his girlfriend's moving form. He gritted his teeth and pulled the trigger. The spirit evaporated, but he knew he'd be back, rocksalt wasn't permanent. Dean rushed to Ryder's side, helping her to stand. "You alright?" he asked, pushing her hair away from her face. "Just a scratch." she whispered, eyes searching the room. "His name was Robert Howard." she told him.

"He just told you that?" Dean asked, hands falling onto her stomach. His breathing finally slowing down a little. "Yeah, he did. He said his name was Robert Howard, and he was going to kill me. Kinda lame but hey his dead." Dean had always been amazed at how she would just brush off things like this. "Come on. We gotta get outta here before he comes back." Ryder nodded, grabbing Dean's hand as he rushed through the house. "Damn it." he said, quietly. Ms. Johnson had returned home, and seemed to have not noticed the Impala still parked out the front. "The backdoor." Ryder whispered. Dean nodded, and led the way to the backdoor, opening it and pulling her through it, clicking is softly behind him. They creeped quietly around the side of the house and out the front gate.

"Here." Dean said, handing Ryder his tie. She took it, and wiped the blood from her eyebrow. Dean sighed, a frown on his face. "Dean. I'm fine. Just a cut and a little headache." Ryder said, pulling him to a stop in front of the Impala. "Yeah, your fine. But you coulda got real hurt in there. You coulda died." he told her, pointing back at the house. "How is that my fault?" she said back to him, her voice just as strong as his. "It's not your fault. But we have to be more careful." Dean said, his voice matching hers. "I can't lose you. Either of you." he added, walking over to the driver's side of the car. Ryder stood infront of the car, looking at the sad eyes of the man she loved. She sighed and got in. Eyes staring out at the road as he drove away. Thankful that her sunglasses covered her eyes, she didn't want him to know she was crying. She'd been terrified in that room, scared not for her own life, but the life of her child.

* * *

Dean had left her alone in the motel room, she'd needed to lay down after the events of this afternoon. She'd hurt her back when the spirit had thrown her into the chair. Her head was throbbing where she had collided with the desk. She pulled the blankets down, her hand rubbing small circles on her stomach. She'd been terrified that the ghost was going to harm her child, she'd never even thought of what it might have done to her. "Hurry up and get bigger." she whispered quietly, "I can't wait to feel you kicking me." A smile crossing her face, the thought of her child moving making her pain go away. She pulled the blankets up again, burying her head in the soft pillows. Her eyelids were growing heavy, but she didn't want to go to sleep. Dean had told her not to, just incase she had a concussion from the bump on the head.

He and Sammy had gone to burn the bones of Robert Howard. Before Dean had left, he'd apologized for yelling at her outside of the house, Ryder had felt really bad about scaring him, and agreed that hunts were now a no go zone for her. She'd stay in the safety of her apartment while the boys would go. Even then Dean was a little uneasy, saying he'd be doing less hunting himself until the baby was born. He'd wanted to be around to go through everything with her. Everything from doctors appointments to any small movement the baby made. He wanted to have a piece of normalcy, and this baby was his chance. His chance to prove he could be something other than a hunter. Ryder smiled, she hadn't expected to fall for someone the way she had for Dean.

She rolled onto her back, eyes staring up at the filthy roof, god how she couldn't wait to sleep in her own bed. To have a hot bath in her own bathroom. Dean had told her, he would stay over more often, which had made her laugh. "Baby, you can move in if you want." she'd drawled, as he stitched up her eyebrow. He'd laughed at her use of the word Baby, knowing she only said it when she wanted him to laugh. Sam was gonna go back to Bobby's, until he found a place near her apartment, wanting to stay close to his family, but not completely depend on them. Ryder had always been worried that she'd stolen Dean from him, never really asking how he'd felt about this whole thing. But when Dean had gone out to grab dinner they'd had a talk about things. Sam had assured her that he was happy that she'd came into their lives. He'd also told her that he was really excited about the baby, he couldn't wait to be an uncle.

The pain in her back was easing up, but she wasn't game enough to sit up. She heard footsteps on gravel just outside the room. Her head turned to the door, she knew who it was. The door opened and two very tired men walked in. Sam came into view first, his shaggy hair a mess, his grey shirt now a muddy brown. A small bruise forming on his jaw. Ryder pulled herself into a slight sitting position, eyes examing the tall man. "He was one stubborn asshole." Sam said, closing the bathroom door behind him. Ryder's eyes fell on Dean, he just looked really tired, and besides a busted lip, there was not a scratch on him. "Room for three?" Dean asked, as he shrugged out of his jacket. "'Course." she answered. Dean stripped down to his t-shirt and boxer shorts, and slid in next to her. "Talk about lumpy." he drawled, cuddling up to her.

"You got that right." she whispered, head leaning against his softly. "How's everything?" Dean asked, his eyes closed as he spoke. "Fine. Just sore." she whispered. Dean nodded, his hand resting on her stomach as she rolled over, her back against his front. "You got a huge bruise that's why it hurts." Dean told her, pulling her shirt back down. Ryder closed her eyes, and hummed her answer. She was so tired, but she knew he was going to keep talking, knowing she still had a headache. "Ryder?" Dean asked, quietly. "Mmmm.." she hummed. "Marry me, someday." he whispered, so softly. She turned her head to look him in the eyes. "Your not kiddin' are you?" Dean shook his head. "Of course I will." she answered. He kissed her softly, and pulled her closer.

When Sam had emerged from the bathroom, Ryder and Dean were fast asleep. Dean was snoring lightly, Ryder's hand was resting over Dean's on her stomach. He smiled and climbed into his own bed. Finally, Dean would stop sacrificing himself for everyone else, because he had his own family starting. A family that Sam couldn't be more proud to be a part of. A family that was gaining two new members.

* * *

The next two days were long, and painful. They were headed back to Texas, they were going home. Dean drove with his music playin softly, as Ryder was still suffering a small headache. Sam was sleeping with his head against the hot leather of his seat, the wind blowing through the window making his hair blow around. Ryder was sitting in the backseat, her long hair pulled up into a messy bun, keeping it up off her neck. Dean looked up into the rearview mirror, catching a glimpse of her smiling face. "You alright?" he asked, looking back at the road. "Yeah. It's hot, huh?" she replied. Dean chuckled, "Yep. I don't know how he's sleepin'." Dean said, pointing his thumb at his sleeping brother. Ryder laughed, and looked at Sam, "He was up all night again. He's still tryin' to work out how your here." she told him. Dean nodded, putting his hand back on the top of the steering wheel.

"I don't care how your still here. I'm just glad you are." she told him, fanning herself with a folded newspaper. "Man, I'm getting big fast." she whispered, looking down at her tummy. "Your not that big. That's normal." Dean said, laughing at Ryder's mock confused face. "I just want it to get bigger, so I know for sure that there's somethin' in there." Ryder said, giggling. Dean laughed at her, a smile staying on his face. "How long til then?" he asked. "Couple of months." she said, her hands coming up to rub his shoulders. "Not too long." he said, leaning into her touch. Ryder just smiled, and continued to rub the tension out of his shoulders. "You drive too much." she said, casually. "I know." he answered. "Want me to take over?" she asked, her hands moving up to his neck. "Naw, not with your head the way it is." he answered, his voice soft.

Ryder giggled. "You like that, don't you?" she asked. Dean nodded, a smile plastered on his face. "I was bein' serious the other night, you know?" he said, one eyebrow lifting. Ryder sat forward and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "I know you were." she whispered softly, kissing his neck as she answered. "What did you mean by someday?" she asked, sitting back against the backseat. "I meant someday, as in not today." he said, laughing at her innocence. "As in when I'm not pregnant?" she asked. Dean shook his head. "As in when you still are, but I'll tell you later." he smirked when he heard her huff. She looked out of the window, and smiled. The sight of her uncle's junkyard always made her happy. It was her home away from home. A place where she felt completely safe.

"Oh lord, Ry. Look at you!" came Bobby's gruff voice. Ryder smiled and rushed to her uncle. "I know, weird isn't it?" she replied, pulling her uncle into a tight loving hug. "You look as beautiful as your mother did." Dean smiled from his spot behind the Impala, his eyes fixed on the pair, laughing and talking about her belly. "What you standing the starin' at boy. Get your ass over here." Bobby said, his voice straining. Tears in his eyes as he saw Dean still standing there. Dean walked over and was pulled into a bonecrushing hug. "I didn't believe 'em at first. But now I know ya here." Bobby said, quietly thumping Dean's back gently. "You take care of those two." Dean nodded, and stepped back. Kissing Ryder on the temple when she stepped next to him.

"Hey Bobby." came Sam's very croaky voice. "Welcome home, son." Bobby answered, tapping Sam lovingly on the shoulder. "Boy, look at the tans on you three." They all smiled, they had spent alot of time outside up at Alan's property, and now had a healthy glow to show for it. "You two stayin' for dinner?" Bobby asked, turning back to Dean and Ryder, as Sam made his way into the house. Ryder looked at Dean's tired eyes, and smiled softly. "Nah. I just wanna go home." she answered. "We'll come over for dinner tomorrow, after my appointment." Dean looked happy with the answer. "Ok, get some sleep boy." Bobby said, pulling Dean into another tight hug. "I love you." he told Ryder, kissing her cheek. "See ya tomorrow guys." Sam said, from his position behind Bobby. Dean started the Impala, and they rumbled their way out of the long drive way.

The roads were almost empty, the only sounds were the kids playing in the safety of their backyards. Ryder had grown quiet, hands resting softly on her stomach as she stared up at the roof of the car. Dean yawned loudly and she turned her attention on him. "It's like that, isn't it?" she said, quietly. Dean looked at her and nodded, as he rolled up to a red light. "Can't wait to eat, and sleep." he said, his hand brushing softly against hers. "Oh, I'm starving." she said, lifting her head up again. Dean laughed, as he took off from the lights, "Take out or home cooked?" he asked. Ryder thought for a minute, then looked at him. "Homecooked, bout time I cooked for you." she said, laughing at his shattered look. "As if I'd make you cook when your that tired." she said, rubbing his cheek softly.

They arrived back at Ryder's apartment after stopping at the local supermarket. Dean had both duffles on his shoudlers, and the two shopping bags in his hand. Ryder looked at him like he was mental. "Let me take something. I'm pregnant, not falling apart." Dean shook his head, "Nope. I got it." Ryder threw her hands up, the international sign for 'Whatever'.

* * *

They stood outside the apartment, Dean was leaning against the doorframe. Ryder was digging through her duffle on his right shoulder. "Found 'em!" Dean laughed at her excitement. She put her keys in the door, and unlocked it. Pushing the door open, eyes wide as she looked around at her home. "Ahh, home sweet home." she drawled. Dean stepped in and closed the door behind him. A sigh of relief escaping his lips. "Man, I didn't realise how attached I was to this place." he said, walking down the hallway, leaving the shopping bags on the counter on his way through. Ryder smiled and watched him lug the bags down to her bedroom, listening for the soft thud of the bags hitting the carpeted floor. She walked into the kitchen, going through the bags, leaving out what she needed, putting away what she didn't.

"How long do you think it will take Mrs. J to come over?" Dean asked, sitting on a stool on the otherside of the counter. Ryder shrugged and looked up. "Not long." She smiled, when she noticed he'd got changed. He was now wearing a plain white t-shirt, that clung to his rather sculpted chest, and showed alot more of his arms, than his other shirts. He had changed from his dark jeans, to a lighter pair, that were covered in holes. "Man, these are so faded." Dean said, looking down at his faded jeans. Ryder giggled, "They look like their meant to be like that." she said, throwing a bunch of vegetables into a pot of hot water. There was a knock at the door, and Dean got up. "Hey, um this is embarrassing. Does Ryder still live here?" Dean chuckled and opened the door completely. "I'm Claire, you must be Dean." the medium sized dark girl said politely. "Yep. That's me." He said, shaking her hand.

"CLAIRE!!" Ryder said, coming out of the kitchen. Claire rushed over to her, wrapping her arms around Ryder's back. "Girl, look at you." she said, looking down at Ryder's belly. Ryder smiled, and looked over at Dean. "That's Dean." Claire whispered, Ryder nodded. "Girl, he's fine." The two girls giggled, and looked at him. "What?" he asked, looking down at his holey jeans. "Nothin' Claire was just askin' if you had a twin." Ryder said, giggling as she walked back into the kitchen. "Ah, no. But I do have a brother." he said, pointing up at a framed picture on the wall. "Damn boy, were your parents models or what?" she asked, looking at the picture of Sam. Dean had sat back on his stool, and shared a silent chuckle with Ryder.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me you was home." Claire said, her dark skin shining in the dull light of the kitchen. "We only just got back 30 minutes ago." Ryder said, laughing at her crazy friend. "You know I wanted to come see your belly. Girl, I can't believe you gonna be a mother." Dean smiled and looked into Ryder's face, she always had this glow when people said things like that. "I couldn't believe it at first." Ryder said, pouring some liquid over the frying Chicken. "How bout you? Are you excited?" Claire asked, turning to Dean. "Like you wouldn't believe." Claire slapped his cheek softly, and pointed her finger at him. "You take care of her. She's my only family." Dean smiled and nodded. "Can do." he answered.

"Girl, pray the baby ends up with eyes like them. They beautiful." Claire said, pointing a thumb in Dean's direction. "Why does everyone keep sayin' that?" Dean asked, scratching his head. Ryder giggled, "You have very beautiful eyes, that's all." Dean nodded, and stood. Coming around to help her dish up. "You stayin'?" Ryder asked Claire. "Nah, I got a date." With that she stood, and kissed Ryder on the cheek, and patted Dean's back. "I'll come see you later in the week." The door closed with a click and Dean looked over at his girlfriend. "She's very interesting." Ryder smiled, and kissed his cheek. "You have no idea."

TWO MONTHS LATER..

Ryder sat crosslegged on the couch, a book in her hand. Her long dark hair was pulled into a ponytail, she was focussed on the book infront of her. Her now much larger belly, seemed like it was sitting in her lap, Dean often sat there staring at it. On her left hand was a small diamond ring, Dean had finally found an engagement ring he felt was good enough for her. Once he'd bought it, he proposed to her properly, one knee and everything. He wasn't very nervous, he knew what the answer would be. Dean was sitting in the armchair to the left of her, watching re-runs of an old tv show. "You think we'll end up like that?" he asked, watching a married couple fighting over tiny things. Ryder shook her head. "I tell you it's stupid BEFORE you do it." she answered, looking at him out of the corner of her eyes, a smile on her face.

"That's true." he said, turning back to the tv. "6 months now isn't it?" Dean asked, looking at her belly. "Uh huh." she answered, her left hand rubbing it softly. "Shouldn't it be kicking then?" he asked, a small frown crossing his brow. "Should be soon." she said, looking into his eyes. "You gettin' excited?" he asked, moving from the armchair to the couch. "You bet." she said, leaning her head on his shoulder. Dean had been a little nervous about Ryder's stomach getting bigger, he'd heard stories about woman thinking they were ugly or fat when they got into the heavier months. He'd been surprised that she had not once complained about her appearance, which in truth he thought was beautiful.

"What time do you have to leave tomorrow?" she asked, moving her body around, her back leaning against his side. "6.30 tomorrow mornin'." Ryder nodded, her head resting softly on his shoulder. "You openin'?" she asked, watching the tv with him. "Yep. Joe's got the day off, and Mike has to take his kid to school." Ryder smiled, chuckling softly at the tv show. "You likin' it there?" she asked. Dean had taken a job down at the local mechanics two months back. He'd finally decided hustling pool and poker wasn't going to support a family. Although, it's not like he couldn't do that for fun on weekends. He'd had it a little rough at first, being the new guy and all, but eventually the guys all warmed up to him, letting him into their little group. "Yeah, it's a little more relaxed now." he told her, kissing the top of her head, his fingers rubbing the back of her neck.

"That's good." Ryder said, a little slow. Dean frowned at looked at her, "Are you okay?" he asked, moving to get a look at her face. She hushed him, and waited frowing softly. "Ah." she said, her face screwing up a little. "What is it?" he asked, his voice full of worry. "The baby's kickin'." Dean's eyes shot to her stomach, a look of disbelief in his eyes. "Here gimme your hand." she said, laying down, her head laying on his thigh. She placed his hand on her stomach, and waited. No more than 2 seconds later, the baby kicked again. "Holy sh*t." Dean said, "Your not lyin'." Ryder laughed, her eyes full of joy. Her hands rubbing her stomach softly. "Does it hurt?" Dean asked, looking down at her. She shook her head, "It feels weird, but it doesn't hurt." Dean rubbed his hand unconsciously over her stomach. Ryder smiled up at him , finger running across his forehead. "Stop frowning, you'll give yourself wrinkles." she said, giggling at him.

"Oh, don't be like that." Dean said, looking down into her beautiful eyes. "Be like what?" she asked, sitting up. "Mean." he said, pulling her chin. She kissed him, her hand touching the side of his face. He brushed his tongue along her lips, and smiled when she giggled. He pulled away and kissed her nose. "I love you." he said, smiling at her. "I love you too." She sat back up and crossed her legs, picking the book back up, and continued from where she'd left off. "Is that more comfortable than sitting like this?" he asked, looking at her. She looked down at herself and smiled. "A little, keeps my back a little straighter." Dean nodded, an adorable look on his face, that made Ryder giggle. "Your so innocent sometimes." she told him, standing up. "Yeah, sometimes. Hey, do you have a dress yet?" he called as she stepped into the kitchen. "Yep." she answered, leaning her forearm against the fridge door. "So, it's all set huh?" he asked, turning leaning his arms on the back of the couch.

"Uh huh." Ryder said, dipping a spoon into a small tub of yoghurt. Dean laughed at her, "Well at least your piggin' out on healthy food." he said, looking up at her as she sat on the back of the couch. Ryder poked her tongue out at him, and put another spoonful into her mouth. "Gimme a mouthful." Dean asked, looking up at her. "No, get your own. I'm already eatin' for two." she replied giggling as he took the spoon from her, sticking it in his mouth. "Too bad." he said, handing back the spoon and turning back the tv. "How's Sammy? Feels like I haven't seen him in months." Ryder asked. Dean looked up at her, "He's good. Comin' over later, I think." Ryder nodded, sitting back down next to him. "The break from the hunting is helpin' him." Dean said, turning to face her. "He's less grumpy." Ryder chuckled, throwing a cushion at him. "Your less grumpy too."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
THE NEXT WEEKEND..

Ryder sat nervously in the small room, just outside the ceremonial area. She knew there was less that 30 people there, but was still anxious. Her hands sat on her thighs infront of her, eyes glued to her engagement ring. Not too far away, Dean was standing with his brother, waiting for her to meet him. Today was a special day, a very special day. This was the day when she was no longer, Ryder Jae Singer. This was the day that she became, Ryder Jae Winchester. Saturday July 19th, 2008 was the day that Ryder married the man of her dreams, and here she was nervously staring at her engagement ring, wearing a long beautiful wedding dress Claire's mother had made for her.  
Claire strolled in, and hovered around her hair, making sure all the pins were sitting in the right places. "Ry, you look amazing." Claire told her, squatting down infront of her. Ryder looked down into her best friends eyes, a small smile crossing her face. "You think?" Ryder asked. Claire nodded, "Girl, your walkin' round in a custom wedding dress, with yo' hair all curled, your fringe back so everyone can see the pretty eyes. Your gorgeous little baby restin' in that belly of yours. Sweety, you look beautiful." Ryder looked down at the dress, smiling when her eyes fell on her belly. "You ready?" came her brother's deep voice. Alan had agreed that Jackson should be the one to walk her down the aisle, he was infact alot closer to her. "Yeah." Ryder said, standing. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror.

The dress was rested just off her shoulder, her now rather large breasts looking average sized. The white silky material clung to her baby belly, and then flowed out around her. "Come on, baby sis. Let's get you married." Jackson said, bending an arm towards his sister. Ryder rested her hand on her brother's arm, looking up at him with a smile on her face. "I look really girly." she whispered, giggling at herself. "You look beautiful." Jackson told her, kissing her softly on the cheek. They stood just to the side of the large doors, both taking a deep breath. Jackson led her into the doorway, her eyes closed for a second her nerves getting the best of her. But when she opened them, and her eyes locked with Dean's all her nerves disappeared. They reached the small step, Dean smiled down at her his hand grabbing hers. She stepped up next to him, eyes never leaving his gorgeous face. "You okay?" he asked quietly. She nodded, and turned to the priest infront of them.

Both stood listening to the priests words, eyes never really leaving eachother. They'd forgotten about all the other people there, all that really mattered was the person infront of them. She slid a small white gold ring, onto his left ring finger, reciting the words the priest had murmured before her. Dean carefully did the same. He squeezed his left hand affectionately on her right, she smiled up at him. "Dean Johnathan Winchester, do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife. In sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?" the gentle priest asked. "I do." Dean said, confidently a small sparkle in his eyes. The priest smiled and turned to Ryder. "Ryder Jae Singer, do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband. In sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?" Ryder smiled, "I do." The priest smiled, looking at both of them. Claire sobbed quietly behind Ryder, causing her to giggle. Dean frowned and looked over her shoulder, chuckling quietly.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride." The priest said, tapping Dean softly on the back. Dean smiled, and stepped closer, his left hand coming up to her cheek, his lips touching hers gently. Ryder smiled, kissing him back. They pulled apart and looked into eachothers eyes. The crowd around them suddenly reappearing, a light clapping in their ears. They turned to the people, smiling happily at everyone. Missouri rushed up to Ryder, pulling her into a tight hug. "Oh, bless you child." she said, cupping Ryder's face in her hands. "Your gonna be just fine." she whispered in her ear. Dean's hand found it's way to hers and he pulled her back to him. "Why, hello there Mrs Winchester." he said, smirking at her. "Well hello there, Mr Winchester." she said, kissing him again.

"Can you believe we just did that?" he asked, as they got into the Impala. "No." she said, smiling brightly. They waved to their family, and drove off towards the small semi pricey hotel they were going to spend the weekend at, thanks to Alan. Dean looked over at Ryder, he was married. Dean Winchester, was married and he couldn't be more happier.

* * *

AN: plz review and let us know what you think, or just want to comment on the story between Ry and Dean so far.


	6. Chapter 6

A few days later, Ryder stepped out of the elevator, in one hand was a large chocolate milkshake, in the other two shopping bags. She walked slowly along the hallway towards her apartment. She opened the frontdoor to her apartment, taking a sip from the straw of her foam cup. "God damn son of b*tch!" came an angry voice. Ryder stepped forward, placing the bags down on the kitchen counter. "F*ck!" came the same voice. Ryder put down her cup, and walked slowly down the hallway, silent giggles escaping her. She stopped outside the door to the guest room, that was slowly becoming a nursery. "Damn it!" Ryder forced on a straight face, and pushed open the door. "Baby, what are you doin'?" she asked, a smile on her face.

Dean was sitting on the floor, attempting to put together the crib they had bought a month ago. Dean threw the screwdriver down, and looked up at her. "Tryin' to put this crap together." he said, a frown creasing his brow. Ryder giggled and slowly got down on the floor, crossing her legs underneath her. She leaned forward picking up the instructions. Eyes scanning the small print. "Man, I kill ghosts for a livin' and I can't even put a crib together." he said, looking down at his hands. "You never did like bein' told what to do." Ryder said, waving the instructions in his face. Dean shook his head, his frown turning into a smile. "That part doesn't go there. That one does." Ryder said, pointing to the varnished wood behind him. "What your gonna sit there and tell me what goes where?" he asked, shaking his head.

"Yup." she answered, passing him the drill. Dean took it, leaning over and kissed her. "Where would I be?" he said, as he drilled the parts together. "Lost and confused." Ryder said, pointing out the next part. With her help it only took Dean an hour to put the crib together, he stood staring at it for a second, his hands resting on the edge, he leaned some of his weight on it, and shook. "How is it?" Ryder said, from her spot on the floor. "Seems good. Just hope when we put the little guy in there it doesn't collapse." Ryder chuckled, pulling herself up. She walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around his middle, chin resting on his shoulder. "It wont." Dean's eyes scanned the small room, slowly it was beginning to look like a nursery. Between working and sleeping, he was having a hard time putting the furniture together.

His hand came up and rubbed hers gently, "How's it lookin'?" he asked her, turning in her arms to hug her. Smiling as her stomach pressed softly against his hip. "It's starting to look like a baby's room." she said, smiling up at him. "Good, that's what I'm aiming to achieve." he said, laughing at the stupid look Ryder was giving him. "Your so stupid sometimes." she said, leaning up and kissing him. "But I love you anyway." she said, turning and walking out of the room. Dean smiled as he watched her leave. The weather was warm at the moment, giving her skin a beautiful bronze glow. Her legs covered by dark blue jeans, and a loose fitting white top covered her baby bump. Most of her hair was down, the top half was pulled into a loose ponytail at the back. He followed her into the kitchen, watching as she pulled a few new shirts out of a bag. "I'm gonna go broke if I get any bigger." she said, looking at him across the counter. Dean smiled, sitting up on the stool.

"What's in that bag?" he asked, pointing to a medium sized black bag. "Look in it if you want. It's the wedding photos, picked them up today." Dean leaned forward pulling the bag towards him. Pulling a small black leather photo album from the bag. Jackson had offered to take the pictures, leaving Dean rather nervous. Ryder watched as Dean flipped open the cover, a smile coming across her face. "He did photography at college." she told her very confused husband. "That's why he offered?" Dean asked. "They look professional, huh?" Ryder said, nodding. "Yeah. You know, for once I didn't feel under dressed." Dean said, chuckling as he looked at a picture of them infront of his car. "I know, you actually wore a tie properly." Ryder drawled, leaning her elbows on the counter.

'Your funny." Dean said, sarcastically. He turned the page, and found a picture of Ryder standing alone. It was clear that she didn't know the picture had been taken, but it was still a good picture. She was stepping down the stairs of Claire's mother's house, her hands pulling the dress up off the ground. Her lips were curled into a large smile, but as Dean looked closer at the picture it became obvious that she was laughing. "I like that." he said, pointing down at the picture. Ryder looked down at it, giggling upon realisation of when it was taken. "Claire had tripped down the bottom step." she told him, eyes sparkling. Dean chuckled at the thought, and looked at the opposite page. "Sneaky asshole." Dean said, looking up at his pregnant wife. "He got you too?" Ryder said, turning the book to face her.

Dean was standing on the grass outside of the small church, his hands in the pockets of his trousers. His jacket pulled open, his white shirted chest showing. He was laughing at something the person next to him had said. His beautiful green eyes sparkling in the sunlight. His hair looked lighter than usual, small light blonde highlights standing out. "You know when you smile or laugh, you get these little lines in the corner of your eyes." she told him, smiling fondly at the picture. "That's cause I'm gettin' old." he told her, laughing. She smiled at him. "I like them." He looked back down at the album taking the album back. "Good. Cause I can't get rid of 'em." Ryder chuckled, taking the new clothes down into their bedroom. "We need to go grocery shoppin' cupboards are low." Dean called after her. "When you wanna go?" she called back. "Now if your up to it." he asked, taking a sip of her chocolate milkshake. "'Kay!" she called back."Quit drinkin my shake." Dean laughed and took another mouthful.

* * *

"Looks busy." Dean said, walking around his car to help Ryder out. "I can do it myself." she said, laughing as he pulled her gently to her feet. "I know, but I thought I'd be nice." he said, kissing her cheek. The stepped into the store, looking around. "It's not so bad." Ryder said, looking up at him. Dean pulled out a trolley and leaned his forearms against as they entered. "Why are you wearin' a cap?" Ryder asked, grabbing a box of cereal from the shelf. "Cause when I attempting to put the the crib together, I kept messing my hair up." Ryder laughed, "You got grease in your hair again, huh?" Dean nodded, looking down at his hands. Ryder shook her head and laughed. "You know, after I met you. I was attacked by this Djinn thing, and I saw my life the way I wanted it to be as a kid." Dean said, quietly so that no one else heard. Ryder dropped a tin of coffee into the trolley. She nodded, looking into his eyes.

"My mom was still alive, and Sammy still had Jess. I was dating this girl with dark hair, a nurse." Dean said, looking up at Ryder, who nodded, she knew what that meant. "But I was the one with the problems, I was an alcoholic, or so I believe anyway. Everyone kept sayin' "Have you been drinkin'?" all the time. Sammy never spoke to me either. When he did he always looked uncomfortable." Ryder stopped walking, turning to him. "Dean, honey. Your not a burden." she told him, brushing her fingers against his stubbled cheek. "And I'm not a nurse yet, I'm still studying. And I wouldn't let you drink yourself into a coma." Dean laughed, and kissed her. "You think I was tryin' to tell myself somethin'?" he asked, pushing the trolley. Ryder watched him grab a few cans from a high shelf, and dump them into the cart. "Who knows what goes on in your head." Ryder said, poking him in the stomach.

"Ryder Singer is that you?" came a male voice from the other end of the aisle. Ryder spun and looked up. "Rick?" she said, smirking. Dean looked up a confused look on his face. "Yep. In the flesh." the man said, walking down and pulling her into a warm hug. "Look at you." he said, his hands falling on her stomach. Ryder smiled, and hugged the man again. "Little Ryder Singer." the guy said, stepping back. "Ah, little Ryder Winchester." she corrected. The guy frowned, then it all came together. "You got married? How come I was there?" Ryder laughed and flashed her left hand. "It's true, it's true. You weren't in town. Jackson went to your dad's to ask." Rick laughed and turned, "Oh sorry dude, I'm Rick Evans." he said, holding his hand out to Dean. "It's cool. Dean Winchester." he said, shaking the guys hand. "Ry, your having a baby." Rick said, looking her over again. "I am, yes. In three months." she answered.

"I still remember you as a kid. Now your havin' one of your own." he said, a huge smile on his face. "Weird isn't it?" she asked, standing close to Dean. "Not really." he said, smiling at the couple infront of her. "How's Jackson?" he asked, moving out of the way of a young woman. "Sober." Dean said, looking down the aisle. "Oh that's great." Rick said, looking up at Dean. "Man, have I seen you before?" he asked, looking at Dean's face. "Uh, I work at the mechanics. Have you been there lately?" Dean asked, hoping he'd never met the younger sister of this man. "OH! You fixed my car last week. Runs heaps better." Dean relaxed a little, smiling at the guy. "Oh right, the silver Monte Carlo." Dean said, nodding his head. "Anyways, my girlfriend is getting off work now. Better go or she'll kill me. I'll see you guys another time." he said, pulling Ryder into another hug. "Bye." she said, as Rick walked away.

Dean laughed, and started walking, "That's Jackson's best friend?" Dean asked, flicking his head in Rick's direction. "Yup. No idea with cars, he's hopeless." Ryder said, laughing. "He was like a second brother to me growin' up." She looked over at him, eyes searching for something. "You don't have to explain yourself to me. I'm the lucky one, who married you." Dean said, looking back at her. Ryder sighed, and looked away. Seeing Rick reminded her that she needed to tell Dean why Jackson was so protective. "I have to tell you somethin', but not here." she said, looking at him. Dean nodded, and pulled her hand towards him, and wrapped his arm around her neck. "Okay."

They finished their shopping, and made their way to the checkout. Dean let out a soft laugh. Ryder turned to him, "What?" she said. Dean leaned down, and whispered into her ear. "That poor woman looks ten times more tired than I feel." Ryder giggled, and slapped his shoulder. "Don't be mean." she said, kissing his cheek. "I was just stating a fact." he said, leaning over, and putting their shopping up onto the belt. "Good evening." the middle-aged woman said, looking down towards Dean. "Hey there." he said, through a yawn. "How are you today?" the woman said, looking at Ryder. "Fine thanks." she answered. The woman fell silent and scanned their shopping through throwing them into bags. Dean looked up at Ryder, "You know in a few months you can do this and I'll stand there." She just laughed at him, and rubbed her stomach. "How far along are you sweetheart?" the friendly service assistant asked. Ryder turned to her, "6 months. The baby's been kicking me all day." Ryder answered, a goofy grin on her face. "Congratulations." she said to both of them. "Thanks." they said in unison.

The woman told Dean the price of the shopping, he nodded his thanks, and pulled his credit card from his wallet. "I got this one." he told Ryder. "Dean, no." she said, moving forward. "No, it's fine." he said, handing over his card. The woman put it through and passed Dean a slip and a pen. "Winchester huh? Like the rifle?" she asked, Dean passed the items back and smiled. "Like the rifle." She passed Ryder the receipt as Dean put the last few bags into the trolley. "Thank you." Ryder said, politely as they walked away.

* * *

It was 5 o'clock when Dean's alarm went off the next morning. He growled softly, rolling slightly and turned it off. He cuddled up behind Ryder, his hand rubbing her stomach softly. A smile crossing his face with he felt a little movement underneath his hand. "Mornin' kiddo." he said, as he lifted the sheets off of him, and dragged himself out of bed. Pulling on his oldest, most torn up pair of jeans, and a old grey t-shirt, he took another look at his sleeping wife. "Eat today please." she murmurred, lifting her head up off her pillow. He sat back on the bed, as she turned towards him. "Will it make you happy?" he asked, his hand playing with hers. "No way. It would make me miserable." she drawled. He chuckled, and kissed her softly. "Okay. I'll eat before I go. See you at 5." She kissed him back. "See ya." she said, patting his butt as he stood. "Ohh, I love it when you get frisky." Dean said, his voice soft and seductive. Ryder giggled, and laid back down. "Go, you gotta get to work."

Dean stepped out of the bedroom, pulling the door over behind him. He let out a long yawn as he headed into the bathroom. He turned the tap on and rised off his face, hoping the cold water would wake him up a little. He sighed when he still felt tired. "Darn." he said, looking up at his reflection. He shook his head, his hair was sticking out at every angle. A few minutes later, he emerged his hair now tamed, and bad taste gone from his mouth. He walked lazily into the kitchen, his sock covered feet padding softly on the carpet. He made himself a coffee, and waited for his toast to cook. The silence brought back the conversation he'd had with Ryder the night before.

-Flashback-

They walked into the apartment, both carrying some shopping bags. He'd told her to wait here, he'd get the rest, their was only 4 left anyway. When he'd returned they both started putting things in their places, once they'd finished Dean's curiosity had gotten the best of him. "What was it you wanted to tell me?" he asked, as he sat down on the back of the couch. Ryder walked around him, sitting in the armchair. Her eyes staring down at her left hand, something in her eyes was different, a look much like the one she'd had on her face back when she turned up injured at Bobby's. "Well you know how you always ask why Jackson is so protective?" she started, looking up into his eyes. Dean nodded a frown on his face. "When I was 16, Jackson was always going to parties, and cause he had to take care of me, I went too." she paused, taking her eyes off of him. Looking down at her stomach. "This one party was full of people I'd never seen before. I stood in my usual spot, near the door of Rick's living room. This guy I'd never met before kept lookin' at me from across the room. At first I thought it was kinda sweet, you know."

Dean watched as her hand came up and wiped away a small tear from her cheek. "Um, he came over and started talking to me. He was kinda funny at first, playing dumb and stuff. Then he got mean, he dragged me up the stairs by my hair. Forcing me into a room, ripping all the clothes I had on away from my body." She paused, eyes looking up at the ceiling, tears filling them again. The whole time I was screaming for Jackson, constantly yelling. He didn't hear me 'til the party broke up and the music cut off. The guy was forcing himself on me, and I was terrified. And you what, for twenty minutes of my life I hated my brother." Dean moved, and squatted down infront of her. Wiping away her tears. She cried harder, and he moved up onto the arm of her seat, pulling her into a tight hug. "He didn't even know I was gone. I thought he didn't care. But he did, cause as soon as he heard me he ran up the stairs. Rick took me out of the room. I don't really know what Jackson did to that guy. But I do know that when he came to me he was crying."

Dean had never imagined something like that happened to her, he'd always assumed she'd always been a hard-ass. She cried quietly for a while, obviously reliving the horrible memory again in her head. "Is that where this came from?" he asked, running a finger along her eyebrow. Ryder nodded her head. "It's something that reminds me of that night everyday." she said, finally pulling her head from his chest. Dean looked down at her, "No wonder you kept rejectin' me." he said, relived to see a smile on her face. "No I was rejecting you, because I was scared of gettin' too attached. But it happened anyway." she said, pushing herself up off the seat. "Yeah, but now I'm stickin' round a few more years." Ryder shook her head, "You say that way too calmly for my liking." she'd said, walking over to cook dinner.

-End Flashback-

Dean put his mug into the sink, as he took the last bit of toast into his mouth. He washed his dishes not wanting to make Ryder do any extra work. He hated to do that to her, when he was in a rush and had to leave mess, he normally felt guilty all day. He walked quietly to the door, slipping his boots on and leaving with as little sound as possible. He had a long day ahead of him, and he was not looking forward to it.

* * *

It was mid-day when Sam had arrived at Ryder and Dean's apartment, he'd come to spend the day with Ryder. He hadn't seen her since the wedding, and was looking forward to just hanging around with her. He knocked on the door a couple of time, and waited. When he heard no movement he grew worried, Ryder was always up before mid-day. "Sam.." came Mrs. Jenkins soft voice. "Yeah?" he answered softly. "A strange man was here earlier, Ryder seemed a little hesitant to speak to him. Is she okay?" she asked, looking up at him. "I don't know. I'll let you know. Go back inside and lock the door. Do not open it, okay. No matter what you hear." The little old lady nodded, and closed her door. Sam squatted down and began to quietly pick the lock. Seconds later it swung open quietly. He could hear a male voice down in the bedroom. One he hadn't heard in a long time.

Sam opened the draw next to him, pulling out a silver gun, closing the door quietly behind him. He crept down the hallway, down to where the voice was coming from. He looked in the small gap in the bedroom door, and found Ryder with her hands tied up above her head, a hard look on her face. "Now, Mrs Winchester. I think you better tell me where he is." came the male voice. She looked at the man, eyes hard and angry. "Go to hell." she said, her voice strong and confident. A large hand slapped across her face, and her head whipped sideways. She didn't make a noise, she just took it. She turned her gaze back on the man, her breathing was hard, this usual meant that she was really angry. "You seriously think I'm gonna just tell you where he is? I know who you are, I ain't stupid, you asshole." she said, hands grabbing hold of the rope around her wrists. "Girl, you got a big mouth on you. Don't think I ain't scared to hurt you, really really bad." came the cold hard voice. "Oh, good. Cause I'm not afraid to hurt you either." With that she brought up her leg, kicking the man in the chest.

Sam took this as his chance, he pushed the door open, gun pointed at the man struggling for breath on the floor. "You know Dean is gonna kill you for this?" Sam said, his voice angry. "If you leave here in one piece that is." Ryder looked up at Sam, a little shocked by his words. "Sammy Winchester? You still alive?" Gordon's evil voice taunted. "It's SAM." came Sam's angry reply. Gordon got up onto his knees, laughing at Sam's seriousness. "Kid, your not gonna do anythin'. We all know it's Dean with all the balls." A smirk crossed Ryder's face, this guy obviously hadn't seen Sam in a while. "See, by hurting that woman, your hurtin' my unborn niece or nephew, and ya see if your a Winchester, family is EVERYTHING." Sam said, returning Gordon's taunt. Gordon was growing nervous, as Sam stepped forward, the gun following every movement he made.

Sam swung a booted foot foreward catching Gordon's nose, the man fell to an unconcious heap. "Asshole." Sam said, kicking him in the stomach. "You alright?" he asked, walking over to Ryder, untying her hands. "Yeah, everyone's fine." she said, rubbing her sore wrists. Sam dragged Gordon out of the room by his ankles, the rope he'd just removed from Ryder over his shoulder. He pulled the man into a kitchen chair, tying him in place. Ryder walked down, her wrists were now a raw red colour. "Ry, I'm gonna need you to go get Dean from work. We gotta get this guy away from here, or else he's gonna just come back for us." Ryder shook her head, "Dean wont be able to leave, it's only him and Mike today." Sam let out a frustrated sigh. "What are we gonna do with him?" he asked. Ryder put her hands on her lower back and thought. "Uncle Bobby has ways of makin' people disappear." she said, eventually.

"Bobby has killed people?" Sam asked, eyes wide. Ryder laughed, and shook her head. "He just gets rid of them, like their memories." Ryder told him. "My mom had these witchcraft books, I'm sure he has them still. I've seen him do it on someone before." Sam looked shocked, "Bobby knows voodoo?" Ryder nodded, "He does." Sam looked at Gordon then back to Ryder. "Look, Dean would go crazy if you weren't here when he got back. So I'll take him to Bobby's with your car. Just ring him to say I borrowed your car. Don't tell him 'til he gets home. You know what he's like." Sam instructed, Ryder nodded her head, handing over her car keys. Sam kissed her forehead, and walked Gordon's confused body down to Ryder's car.

* * *

Ryder sat alone in the room that was going to be a nursery. She was completely shaken by what had happened only twenty minutes earlier, that Gordon guy was a phsyco. She sat on the floor, her cell in her hand, dialling the number of Dean's work. Mike had answered, "Hey darlin'. Are you okay?" Ryder took a shaky breath. "Yeah, I just needed to tell Dean something is all." she said, trying to make her voice sound natural. "Hold on a second darlin'." Minutes later Dean had picked up the phone, he knew something was up as soon as he heard her breathing. "What's goin' on?" he asked, his voice laced with worry. Ryder's heart had slowed down dramatically just hearing his voice. "We had an incident, but Sammy and Bobby have it in order." she told him, her voice less shaky now. She heard a door close and all sound disappear. "What kind of incident?" he asked, his voice gentle. "A Gordon related incident." she said, quietly. Dean sighed, "sh*t. Did he hurt you?" He sounded angry, but she knew it wasn't directed at her.

"Just rope burn and a slapped cheek. The baby's fine too." she said, answering his next question before he asked it. She heard a chair move, and him sit in it. "Are you sure your alright?" he asked, his voice back to normal. Ryder smiled, Dean worried a little too much sometimes. "Yes, I'm fine." Dean was drumming his fingers on the surface infront of him, something he did unconciously. "What's Bobby gonna do?" he asked, his voice soft. Ryder stared at the crib infront of her. "Memory wipe. Just the memories of the passed year or two." Dean's hand had stopped moving, but she knew he was still anxious. "Baby, you can't leave work." she told him, knowing what was on his mind. She heard him chuckle, "How do you do that?" he asked. Ryder smiled, "I know you is all. Aren't you busy?" Dean shuffled on the other end of the phone. "Naw, it's slow here today."

Ryder nodded, laughing at his boredom. "What?" came his usual tone. "Nothin', look I'm fine, I promise. You better get back to work." she said, finally feeling better. "I'm on lunch anyway." Dean answered, she knew he wasn't gonna let her go that easy. "You want me to come home for lunch?" he asked, knowing she was still a tiny bit shaken. "If you want, but I'm fine really. Sam will be back soonish." she answered. "I forgot to grab something for lunch anyway, I'll bring somethin' home, okay?" Ryder smiled, he just wanted to check up on her. "Okay." she answered. "See you in a few minutes." came his soft voice, and he hung up the phone. Ryder placed her phone on the floor next to her, looking around the room. She needed something to keep her busy, so she decided to do some work to the nursery.

She stood, and laughed as the baby kicked. "Oh, hello there." she said, rubbing her belly. She opened the cupboard, and pulled out the blankets that Sam had bought for the baby's crib. "Uncle Sammy got you some nice stuff, kiddo." Ryder said, looking at the small covers with a smile. She stood next to the crib, pulling a sheet around the small matress, laughing as her child kept kicking her. "Darlin' there's no music here. Why you dancin'?" she said, as she continued making the small crib. Ryder leaned over and turned on Dean's small tape player. The soft hum of Eric Clapton played into the room, and the baby slowly calmed down. "Oh, you got your Daddy's taste in music." she said, tucking the small quilt into the edges of the matress. When she was done, she stood back and looked at her work. "There, now that looks better." she told herself.

She walked back to the cupboard, looking around the small space. She decided to focus on the linen type stuff, that wasn't too hard at the moment. She pulled out a small bag, pulling out the curtains that Claire had helped her mother make. They were white with little teddybears scattered across them. Ryder smiled and pulled down the wire above the window, threading the curtains onto the thin wire. She sang along softly to the song playing, smiling as she went about swapping the curtains. She hadn't even noticed Dean in the doorway behind her. The song finished and she reached up to hook the wire back up. Jumping when two big hands helped her. "How long were you standing there?" she asked, when the recognised the scent. "Since you started taking the old curtains off." came Dean's voice. "I didn't think I'd ever hear you sing." he said, as she turned around. "Well, now you have." she said, looking up at him.

He took her hands in his, and examined her wrists. "Does it hurt?" he asked, bringing his attention back on her face. "A little." she answered, squeezing his hands softly. "Come on. I'll clean them up for you." he said, leading her into the kitchen. She sat down at the table, the smell of hot chicken hitting her nose. "Oh that smells good." she said, looking into the paper bag infront of her. "It's nothing special. Just a chicken and some fries." Dean said, pulling a chair infront of her. He rubbed a warm cloth over her wrists gently, looking up when she hissed softly. "Sorry." he said, quietly. "It's not your fault." she said, watching him apply antispetic onto her raw skin. He looked so focussed, like a child who was learning to tie up their shoelaces. He gently wrapped a bandage around each wrist, and kissed her cheek. "Now eat." he told her, a small smirk on his face.

She watched him pack away the first aid kit, and wash his hands. He sat in the seat he'd just stood from and looked over her face. "That's gonna bruise." he said, pointing to her cheek. "I've had worse." she said, pointing to her back with her thumb. Dean shook his head, and opened his food. "Your a strong woman. You know that?" he told her, putting two fries into his mouth. "So I'm told." she answered, watching his eyes light up again. "Well, as long as you know." he said, around a mouthful of food. Ryder laughed and looked away. "Dean, that is seriously disgusting." She heard him laugh, and move closer to the table. "You love it." he mumbled through his food. Ryder put her hand over his mouth, and giggled at his wide eyes. "Etiquette, that's what you don't have right now." she said, kissing his cheek. "Why are you all happy anyways?" she asked, taking her hand away.

"Cause me and Sammy are finally getting that jerk off our backs." he answered, his mouth now empty. "That's better." Ryder said, laughing when he rubbed his hand on her chin. "Mike wants me back at 2." Dean told her, shovelling more fries into his mouth. "Said cause you sounded terrified, I could take a longer break." Ryder nodded, eating some of her chicken. She looked back at Dean, seeing just how worried he still was. "I think the baby has your taste in music." Ryder said, in an attempt to clear his mind. He smirked and shook his head, "Why do you think that?" he asked, closing his empty take out box. She did the same, and turned her whole body to face him. "Because it was kickin' like crazy when Sam left, and as soon as I turned on your tape, it stopped." Dean smiled, and patted her stomach. "Awesome." he said, leaning forward to kiss her.

THREE MONTHS LATER..

It was 4pm on a Saturday afternoon, the weather was cool so Dean had started the fire. Knowing Ryder would be cold eventually, he could hear her slowly getting out of the bath. He looked over to the bag at the doorway, placed there for when they had to do a mad dash to the hospital. The baby was now two weeks overdue, and Ryder's doctor had told them she would be going any day now. All day Dean had this feeling that today would be the day, he didn't know why, he could just sense something was different about today. He looked over his shoulder, and saw Ryder woddle from the bathroom to the bedroom. He thought it was the funniest thing, the way her body moved when she walked. He wasn't being mean or anything, he'd just never really remembered seeing his mother walk that way. "Um, Dean!" Ryder called, "Get the bag ready!" Dean's head spun, and he rushed to the bedroom. Ryder was leaning against their chest of drawers, breathing heavily. "You bein' serious?" he asked, walking up next to her. "Very serious." she said, looking into his green eyes.

Dean turned and called the hospital, informing her doctor that they were on their way. A couple of minutes later, Ryder emerged from the bedroom, wearing a loose dress. "Oh god. If I knew it was gonna hurt this much I wouldn't have been so excited." she said, her right hand on her lower back, her left rubbing her belly softly. Dean helped her to the door, picking up her bag as they walked past. "You alright?" he asked, as he locked the door. "I think so, haven't done this before so I don't know what is good or not." Dean chuckled, "I think we're okay." he said, guiding her to the elevator. She leaned against the wall, breathing slowly as Dean spoke to Sam on his cell. "Yeah, dude that's the place. Alright, see ya there." Ryder looked up at him, smiling softly. "You know pretty soon we're for real parents." she said, relaxing as the contractions passed. Dean grabbed her hand, "Well, at least the nursery's ready." he told her, kissing her temple as the doors opened.

No more than 15 minutes later, Dean was parking his car outside of the hospital. He rushed around to help Ryder out of the car. "You alright, babe?" he asked, as she grabbed his shirt in a clenched fist. "NO!" she said through gritted teeth. He nodded, and walked her into the front desk. "Ryder Winchester?" a small latin woman asked. Ryder nodded, and looked at Dean. "Come on sweetheart, lets get you settled. The nurse wheeled around a wheelchair, and led Dean to a room down a long hallway. The nurse gently helped Ryder out of the wheelchair, and out of her dress. She then slid a blue hospital gown over Ryder's head, and helped her onto the bed. Ryder was in the middle of another contraction, and needed all the help she could get.

"Okay sweetheart, do you need anything?" the nurse asked, after attaching Ryder to a heart rate monitor. Dean looked at the screen confused. "Oh darlin' the second one is your baby." Nurse Karlie told him. "Makes more sense to me now." Dean said, looking down at the nurse."Your doctor will be in shortly, okay?" the small nurse said, "I'll be here as well." Ryder nodded, her brow creased into a frown, her face was sweaty and she looked tired already. "This is very real." Ryder said, looking up at him. Dean smiled, "I know." Ryder took his hand, eyes looking up to him. "Don't go anywhere okay?" she asked, her head resting on the pillow behind her. "You know I wont." he said, brushing her wet hair off of her face. "Is that comfortable at all?" he asked, looking at how they had her laying. She was in a bed that was risen up so that she was sitting up, her legs wide open under a large white blanket. "Surprisingly, yes." she answered slowly, her grip on his hand getting tighter. The door opened and the nurse returned with Dr. Louis. "Hello there, Mrs Winchester. It's weird saying that now, after calling you Miss Singer for so long." Ryder laughed lighlty, releasing her vicelike grip on Dean's hand.

"Okay, so your contractions are getting closer together, which means the hard part starts soon. Dean you'll need to put this on." Dr. Louis said, handing him a white gown that covered the front of his body. He pulled it over his arms, and looked back at Ryder. "Very pretty." Ryder said calmly. Another contraction waved over Ryder, her hand grabbing hold of Dean's forearm. Her head tilted back, a loudly moaning escaped her lips. Dr. Louis pulled up the blanket and looked down. "Okay, sweety your almost fully dialated. Not long now." Ryder continued breathing steady, eyes glued to the baby's heart rate. "Dean look." she said softly. "Yeah I know." he said warmly, trying to avoid her yelling at him. He ran his hand along her arm, and kissed her temple. Another contraction hit, and she cried out again, Dean wanted to know what was happening in there to cause her so much pain. "Okay sweetheart, your ready to start now. When I tell you to I want you to push. You got that?" Dr. Louis said, smiling warmly at her patient. Ryder nodded, her head falling back against the pillow.

Ryder took a deep breath when the next contraction started. "Push sweetheart." the small woman instructed. Ryder started pushing, her clamping down on Dean's, who didn't complain once about the pain she was causing him. "Very good." the doctor told her. She winked up at Dean, who looked a little worried. "The yellings normal. She's fine." the doctor told him. He turned to his tired wife, and rubbed the back of her neck. "Your doing so well." he told her, his voice soft and soothing. "Sorry, about your fingers." Ryder said, through slow breaths. "It's nothin' compared to what your goin' through." he told her, grabbing her hand as she began to push again. "Alright sweetheart not far now." the doctor called. "I shoulda asked for the drugs." Ryder said, her eyes closing from the pain.

Two hours later, the doctor informed them that they were in the home stretch. "OH FOR CHRISTS SAKE!" Ryder yelled, when the pain got too much. Dean's eyes snapped wide open, she was definately sore. "Alright honey, we can see the head now." the nurse told her. "You don't wanna see it." Dean said, moving back so he couldn't anymore. Ryder half giggled, at Dean who looked absolutely terrified. "You Jerk." she said, smiling up at him. He snapped out of it and looked at her. "Come again." Ryder shook her head and got ready for the next round of pushing. "Come we just need a few more big pushes." Ryder looked wrecked, "I can't do this anymore." she said, eyes full of unshed tears. Dean put his lips to her ear. "Come on darlin' just a few more, and it's all over. You can do it." he told her, his hand rubbing her back. She leaned her headback, and started pushing again, a louder cry escaping her lips. Dean's eyes widened, "What happened?" he asked, looking at the doctor. "The head's out, not far now." she told him. "Ryder, sweety one more big push and the rest is easy. I promise." Ryder took a deep breath grabing Dean by his gown. "See what you do to me?" she said through gritted teeth. Dean didn't take notice of her tone, he'd grown used to her yelling at him. He just continued to give her encouragement. Ryder was breathing hard now, she'd just pushed the shoulders out.

"One more big pushed sweety. Then it's all over." Ryder nodded, thankful to hear she was nearly done. Dean was practically on the bed behind her, she'd pulled him there minutes ago. She leaned her head back onto his shoulder and pushed, a loud cry coming out of her mouth. "Oh, there you go." Ryder fell back against Dean, her breathing hard and heavy. "You did it." he whispered kissing her cheek. The sound of a baby crying caught their attention. They both looked at the doctor, who had just cut the cord. "It's a boy." she said, as the nurse laid a towel on Ryder's stomach. Dr. Louis laid the baby down gently on the towel, helping Ryder cover him. Dean helped her to sit up, looking over he shoulder at the small baby in her arms. "Hey there." Ryder said, her finger gently touching the baby's tiny nose. Her eyes found their way to Dean's who looked lost for words. "We have a baby boy." she whispered to him, smiling brightly. "We do." he said, his hand gently touching his son's head. "Do you have a name picked out?" the small nurse asked. Ryder looked back down at the bundle in her arms. She smiled, "Dean Jackson Winchester." she said, quietly, her finger rubbing the babies red cheek. "You still wanna call him that?" Dean asked softly. Ryder looked up into his eyes. "Definately." she said, as the nurse took their son to clean and dress.

* * *

Dean walked down the hallway to the small waiting room. A huge smile on his face, he saw four men sitting together in the waiting room. Bobby was sitting next to Sam, who was talking to Alan. Jackson was pacing quietly, eyes down on the floor. "Dean!" Sam said, catching Dean's figure in the doorway. The men all looked at him, waiting impatiently. "It's a boy." Sam pulled Dean into a tight hug, patting his back hard. "Congrats, dude." Dean smiled, as Alan pulled him into a hug, that was Jackson joined in on. Bobby stood to the side a massive smile on his face. "What did you two name him?" Jackson asked. "Ry, chose the name months ago. She called him Dean Jackson." he said, scratching his head.

They all sat down, Dean's legs were sore from standing for almost 3 hours, his left hand was throbbing. "How is she?" Alan asked, sitting across from Dean. "She's tired. She just wants to sleep but she had to feed him first." Dean answered. "Can I see her before she does?" he asked. Dean nodded, "You can go in now, if you want. Room 515, they just moved her there." Alan stood, and walked down the hallway. "Woah, she did that?" Jackson asked, staring at Dean's hand. "Oh yeah." Dean answered, resting it on his leg. "So she named him after you two?" Sam asked. Dean nodded, "That's real cool." Sam answered. "Be weird if he looks like you." Dean laughed thinking back to his dreams. "You goin' home tonight?" Jackson asked. Dean shook his head, "She wants me to stay." Dean leaned his head back, a loud yawn escaping his lips. "Man, it's only 7." Dean said, rubbing his right eye.

* * *

"Hey kiddo." Alan said, poking his head in the door. "Hey dad." Ryder said, quietly looking up from the small baby in her arms. "How you feelin'?" Alan asked, sitting on the bed next to his daughter's legs. "Exhausted." she answered, looking back down as Dean continued to drink from the warm bottle in her hand. "I can imagine." Alan answered, his hand brushing the baby's light coloured hair. "He's gonna be blonde like his Daddy." Ryder nodded, pulling the empty bottle from her son's lips. Moving him so he was resting on her shoulder, her hand gently tapping his back. "Isn't weird how things like this just come so naturally?" Ryder asked, her voice laced with exhaustion. "It's nature, that's all. Just instincts." Alan told her, smiling when a small noise escaped the baby in his daughter's arms.

"Darlin' I'm so proud of you." he said, leaning forward and kissing Ryder's forehead. She smiled at him, "You sound like Dean." she replied, smiling warming as she laid Dean back down in her arms. "He's beautiful, sweetheart." Alan said, standing up slowly. "I know, he is." she whispered through a yawn. Dean walked through the door, a coffee in one hand, a bottle of water in the other. "Jackson said his leavin'. They're going back to Bobby's to celebrate." Dean told him, placing the water on Ryder's side table. "Thanks son. I'll come by tomorrow okay? I love you darlin'." He said, leaving the room.

* * *

It was 8 o'clock in the evening, and Ryder was fast asleep. Dean sat in a small armchair to her left, next to the small plastic crib. He had his head tilted back, eyes staring up at the white ceiling. He'd just closed his eyes, when a small cry made it's way to his ears. He sat up and turned. "What's all that about, huh?" he said, looking down at the small baby. The baby cried a little, and stopped upon hearing his voice. "Are you trickin' me?" he asked, as he pushed himself up from his seat. The baby started crying again, so Dean gently lifted him up into his arms. "Now we can't have you doin' that. Your gonna wake up your Mommy." he said, pulling the blanket around the small body. As soon as Dean had started walking his son stopped crying, small eyes looking up at him. "You thought you were alone, huh?" Dean whispered sitting back in his armchair. The blanket came loose, as Dean got comfortable, a tiny hand started waving around.

Dean smiled, and looked down. "What are you doin'? You dancing?" he asked, moving his free hand to pull the blanket back over the small body. The tiny hand grabbed hold of his index finger. He gently rubbed his thumb across the tiny fingers, smiling down at his child. "It's gonna be weird callin' you Dean." he said, chuckling softly as his finger ended up in the baby's mouth. "You can't eat me." he said, pulling the baby up closer. He looked over at the bed, Ryder was still fast asleep, her head resting softly against the pillow. Her hands laying gently on her stomach. Her hair was pulled back off her face, and for once it was natural, long waves kinked through it. His son made a small noise, and Dean looked back down.

The little life that was resting in his arms was his own flesh and blood. The beginning of his own family, his own life. Dean now had some kind of normalcy in his life, a happy medium. Looking into the small face of his son, showed him that he was going to be okay. "Why are you awake huh? You should be sleepin' kiddo." Dean said softly. Little Dean scrunched his tiny face up, his small mouth opening wide. His little hand never letting go of Dean's finger. "See your tired." he said, chuckling at the small bundle in his arms. Dean looked up to check if Ryder was still asleep, when he seen that she was, he lifted Dean to his shoulder, one hand supporting his neck gently, the other rubbing his back softly. Dean began to sing a song his mother had sang to him when he was kid. He felt a small hand fall onto his shoulder, and a tiny head leaning against a neck.

Minutes later, Dean carefully laid his son back into his arms. His small face was peaceful, he was finally asleep, with Dean's amulet clenched into his small hand. He carefully removed it from the tiny hand, and sat back into the chair. He was tired, but he didn't want to put the small baby down yet. So he sat there, and just watched the infant sleep in his arms. He'd completely forgotten about the pain in his hand, or the fact that Ryder had squeezed a raw bit of skin on his forearm. Dean pushed the tiny hosptial bracelet around on Dean's little wrist, smiling blankly down at his child. "Small, huh?" Ryder whispered, eyes slightly open. "He's tiny." Dean answered, looking up at her. "Your good with him, you know?" she told him. Dean looked at her, realising she hadn't been sleeping at all. "You heard it all?" he asked, moving to lay the infant back in the small crib. "I did. You have a beautiful voice." she told him, rolling onto her side, pulling her pillow onto an angle.

Dean sat on the bed, his hand resting on the matress behind her. "Oh, don't start that stuff." he said, his free hand brushing through her wavy hair. "Have you slept yet?" he asked, looking down at her. She nodded, "For a while. He woke me when he started crying." she said, her hand coming up to Dean's cheek. "You should get some rest." Dean whispered, leaning down to kiss her. "So should you." she said, looking into Dean's tired eyes. "What should I do, jump in with you?" Dean said, sarcastically eyes feeling sore. She just patted the space behind her, yawning softly. Dean chuckled and crawled over her legs, laying ontop of the covers behind her. "Dean?" she asked, quietly fingers tickling his forearm. "Mmm..?" he replied. "Why do you have a bandage on your arm?" she asked, turning her head. "So I don't get an infection from work." Dean said, smirking. "But what's there to get infected?" Ryder asked, her voice still croaky. Dean smiled, and removed the bandage. Ryder pulled his right arm towards her, eyes fixed on a small tattoo on the inside of his forearm. The intials, RW were right there in black ink. "It's like mine." she told him. He nodded, his eyes closed, head leaning into the soft pillow. Ryder kissed his cheek, and laid back down, eyes sparkling as they fell on her baby sleeping in the crib.

* * *

A couple of days later, Ryder was sitting on the hospital bed with her legs crossed under her. Her son laying in her arms, her husband sleeping uncomfortably in the armchair to her left. Dean had worked overtime today, and was definately feeling it. "What are you doin'?" Ryder said, eyes looking over Dean's sleeping form. "Hello..?" came Sam's voice. Ryder's eyes snapped off Dean and over to the door. "Hey!" she said happily. Sam strolled quietly over to the bed. Sitting on the end of it, he started shaking his head. "Overtime?" he asked. Ryder nodded, "Yep." She looked down at little Dean, and smiled. "He's just doing what he thinks is best for us." Sam nodded, looking away from Dean. "You excited to be goin' home?" he asked, looking at her packed bags that Dean had his feet propped up on. "Oh, yeah. I miss my bed." Ryder said, leaning forward and shaking Dean's foot.

He snorted, and sat up. "What?" he slurred. Sam and Ryder looked at eachother, chuckling at Dean's lost state. "Can we go home now?" she asked, standing up. Dean rubbed his eyes, and sat forward. "Uh yeah. Sorry." he said, "Oh, hey Sammy." Sam laughed, and nodded back to his brother. Ryder gently put little Dean into a black capsule. "There you go." she said, fastening him in, and placing a white blanket over him. "Sammy's stayin' at ours tonight, Bobby's got Jo and Ellen stayin' over." Ryder said, turning back to Dean. "Ha, yeah I'd sleep out too man." Dean said, standing and stretching his sore muscles.

"You carryin' bubs or am I?" he asked, looking down at Ryder. "I got him." she said, kissing Dean softly. "Right, I'll get ya bag then." Sam laughed picking up the baby's bag. "Where's all the flowers and presents?" Sam asked. Dean turned to Sam, "I did that run already." Ryder laughed, walking past. "Mrs. Winchester, would you like a wheelchair?" Nurse Karlie asked. Ryder shook her head. "No thank you." The nurse looked down into the capsule. "Seeya little fella. I'll see you in a couple of weeks." she said, rubbing his cheek softly. "Bye, sweety." the nurse said, before heading off. "So, how's things with Claire?" Dean drawled, laughing at Sam's face. "What?" he asked. Ryder slapped Dean's shoulder. "Shh.." she said, stepping out of the hospital.

They got down to the Impala, and Dean got into the back. "Alright missy. Hand him over." he said, laughing. Ryder handed the capsule to Dean, who carefully strapped it into place. "Hey there little guy." he said, when his sons eyes stared up at him. "I'm still shotgun." Sam said, shuddering. Dean laughed, "Man, that wasn't the only time we.." Sam threw his hands over his ears. "I don't wanna know." Ryder giggled, and kissed Dean as he got out of the car. She got in and shut the door behind her. The two boys got in, and within minutes they were headed down a busy main road. "This place gets busy at night." Sam said, looking around. "I'll give you ten bucks if you can spot a hooker.." Dean said, turning to Sam. Ryder's laughter travelled into the front seat. "Your on."

With that, Dean slowed the speed down, and Sam started scanning the crowds of people. Dean laughed, when his son made a loud crying noise. "Even the baby thinks you suck." Dean said, pointing into the backseat. "Oh, great now I got two jokers." Sam said, eyes falling on a skankily clad blonde woman. "Right there.." Sam said, pointing to the blonde chick. "Ehh. Wrong." Ryder called from the backseat. Dean laughed, "Nah, she's a stripper." Sam huffed, "Who then?" Ryder leaned forward. "See that red haired lady?" she asked, pointing out of the windscreen. Sam eyes widened, "The one in the business suit?" Ryder sat back nodding. "Yup." Sam huffed again, shaking his head. "You guys come here alot?" Dean shook his head, "Just know the area."

* * *

It was 1.30 in the morning, and Dean still wasn't home. Ryder was pacing in the small hallway outside of the room in which her two month old son was sleeping. Dean had gone on a hunt with Sam, they'd caught news that a werewolf was living downtown, so they'd gone to get rid of it. Ryder pulled her long bathrobe tighter around her, and entered her son's room. His blonde hair shining softly in the moonlight, she smiled when she noticed he'd thrown his pacifier out. "You don't like that much, do you?" she whispered, her hand brushing his soft hair lightly. She heard the rumble of a familiar car, and felt slightly relieved. "Daddy's home." she said, quietly as she pulled the blankets up onto Dean's stomach. "I wish you'd leave that on." she said quietly as she kissed her son's brow. Ryder walked out of the room, and wandered down the hallway, turning on the coffee pot, knowing Dean would head there first.

She heard slow footsteps outside of the apartment, followed by a thump against the wall. "That's not good." she told herself, rushing to the door. She didn't even check, she just pulled it open, eyes wide when she saw him. Dean was leaning against the wall, his face was covered in small grazes. Blood running from his nose and mouth. "Help." he said softly. "Where's Sam?" she asked, taking his arm around her neck. "Jackson's." Dean said, through clenched teeth. "What happened to you?" she said, sitting him on a chair in the kitchen. "Those werewolve's are bitches." he said, "The woman was nuts, she pulled me from a movin' car." Ryder frowned. "You guys went in Jackson's ute didn't you?" she asked, helping him take of his jacket. He nodded, a frown on his face. "Baby, you gotta be more careful." she whispered, examining his injuries. "Sorry." Dean said, eyes looking down the hallway. "I woulda called but I didn't wanna worry you." Ryder ruffled his hair, and walked down to the bathroom. As soon as Dean let out the slightest grunt of pain, the baby started crying.

"Hold on." Ryder called, turning the light on in the nursery. "Oh, baby. What's wrong?" she said, pushing down the side of the crib, and picking up her son. "Oh, darlin' come on." Ryder said, letting his head rest on her shoulder. She put the first-aid kit under her other arm, and carried Dean carefully into the kitchen. "Is he hungry?" Dean asked, looking up at her as she entered. "No, I fed him and hour ago. He's got a clean diaper too." she said, gently rocking the crying infant. "Oh, oh, oh." Ryder said softly. "What's all that about, hey?" Ryder looked down at Dean, and smiled. "What?" he asked, looking up at her. "You look so cute when he cries." she said. "Cause sometimes I don't know why he's doin' it." Dean said, quietly. The baby went quiet, head turning against Ryder's chest. "Who's that?" Ryder said, softly. "Maybe he just missed you, or somethin'?" she said, turning back to her husband. Dean frowned, and lifted a single eyebrow. "You think?" Ryder shrugged. "You voice seems to calm him down." she said, patting her son's back.

"When your in class sometimes, he screams like that. But when you get home he's fine." Dean said, looking at his son's tear stained cheeks. "You know what? Maybe all the stressing I did when I was pregnant has made him anxious about you." Dean laughed, and regretted it straight away. Grunting when his ribs protested. Little Dean started crying again, "Oh, I scared him." Dean said, biting his lip. Ryder shook her head, "Nah, little kids have a creepy sixth sense. They always know when somethin' up. He's probably uneasy cause your hurt." Ryder said, remembering how Alan had told her that she cried all night the night her mother disappeared. "Sammy would cry for hours, after our Mom died. Kinda makes sense." Dean said, touching her hand. "Can you kinda, you know?" he said, pointing to his face. Ryder nodded, and put their son down in his capsule, which had been left on the kitchen table. "He's not gonna calm down now." Ryder said, looking down at Dean's face. "Hand me that shirt?" Dean asked, pointing to the one hanging on the back of the chair she'd been sitting on.

"Here. Why?" she said, looking confused. "Watch." He pulled his dirty blood stained shirt off, and dropped it over his knee. He pulled the button up shirt on, one arm at a time, holding in his pain. He carefully picked up his son, leaning his head back so Ryder could get to his face. As soon as the infants head was cradled in Dean's arm, he stopped crying, his hand holding the seam of Dean's shirt. "Hey buddy." Dean said, his hand rubbing gentle circles on the baby's tummy. "Wow." Ryder said, as she wiped a warm damp cloth over his cuts. "She didn't scratch you or nothin', did she?" she asked. Dean shook his head. "I was dragged along a gravel road." Ryder scruched her nose up. "Ugh. Damn coffee." Dean smirked, "You look cute when you do that." Ryder dipped the cloth into the small bowl, and kept dabbing away the blood. "Want a coffee?" she asked, her unique eyes, locking with Dean's green ones. "You know it." Dean said, taking a deep breath. His ribs were badly bruised, and little Dean had just kicked his little foot into them.

Dean's free hand, grabbed the two little feet, his thumb rubbing the soft skin. "No more bashin' Daddy." Dean said, looking down. "If he could talk he'd call me an idiot." he said to Ryder, who just placed a mug of coffee on the table infront of him. "Your not an idiot. I talk to him too, it's how they learn." she whispered. "I guess." Ryder kissed his nose. Laughing then he screwed it up. "It's the only part that's not all cut." Dean smirked. "Plant one on me." he said, pointing to his lip. She leaned down, and kissed him softly, smiling when she felt his hand on her neck. She pulled away and picked up some alcohol wipes. "Wanna put him down, or you okay?" she asked, looking at him. Dean shook his head, "Naw, he just went to sleep. I'll be fine." Ryder nodded, and dabbed at the cuts, smirking when he winced slightly. "He still asleep?" Dean asked, looking up at her. "Yeah."

When Ryder had finished, Dean carefully stood up. Carrying little Dean down to the nursery, laying him down gently in his crib. "G'night, kiddo." Dean said, leaning over and kissing the infant on the forehead. He looked down at his son, smiling at the innocence of him. He turned, and switched off the light, the only light in there now was a shadow lamp Jackson had gotten him. "You sure you don't need a hospital?" Ryder asked, pulling his arm around her shoulders carrying most of his weight into the bedroom. "Naw, I got the day off tomorrow. I'll just sleep it off." Dean said, as he undone his belt, and took his jeans off. Ryder watched as he removed his shirt. "Sweety that doesn't look too great." Dean slowly sat down, looking up at her. "I know." Ryder remembered back to the night when she'd turned up at Bobby's. Dean looked exactly how she'd felt. She removed her bathrobe, and climbed into bed. "Come here. Your shivvering." she said, as she pulled the sheets over her bare legs. "Is that my t-shirt?" he asked, sliding up next to her. "No. It's mine, and yes I'm wearing shorts." she said, before Dean could open his mouth.

"Ry, why do you think the worst of me?" he said, sarcastically. "Cause I know you. That's why." she answered turning off the lamp on her bedside table. "Glad I married you then." Dean said, laughing. Ryder turned to face him, her lips locking with his. "I love you too." she said, before she cuddled down into her pillow.

AN: we love reviews, will post for reviews :)


	7. Chapter 7

AN: sorry i didn't update yesterday i was sick in bed all day sleeping, fighting off a cold. i'm getting a lil better tho. i want to thank everyone that reviewed and took the time to read this wonderful love/ family story.

plz leave your wonderful review.

* * *

When Dean woke up the next morning, his son was laying on the bed next to him. Ryder would put him there when she had class, but today it was different. Today she did it so that he didn't have to get up in a rush when he started crying. Dean rolled over slowly, looking down at the little body. "Looks like it's just you and me today kiddo." Dean said, smiling when the baby kicked his legs out. "Come here." Dean sat up a bit, leaning over and picking his son. "Your quiet this mornin', Mommy must have fed you already." Dean said. His son cuddled into his shoulder, his hand grabbing the leather rope on his necklace. "Don't stick it in your mouth this time. Remember last time?" Dean said, laughing. Little Dean had put the amulet in his mouth, and instantly started crying. Dean turned his head to his clock, sighing when it was past 12. "Hang on, kiddo." Dean said, placing the baby down in the middle of the bed, placing pillows on each side of him. Dean knew he needed a shower, but had no energy to do it.

He pulled a clean t-shirt over his head, and pulled it carefully down his very bruised torso. "Ah, damn it." Dean said under his breath. He pulled on a pair of black sweatpants, and picked up the little baby and walked slowly down to the kitchen. He put on a pot of coffee, and moved to sit on the couch. A knock at the door stopped him, he rubbed his hand along his son's back and walked to the door. "Hey honey. Ryder said to check on you." Mrs Jenkins said, looking up at Dean. "Oh, sweety what happened to you?" she asked, staring at his cut up face. "Oh, I got into a fight downtown." Dean said, shifting his son to his other shoulder. "Dean, your a sweet boy. Why do you always get into trouble?" Dean shrugged, chuckling as the elderly woman squeezed passed, and walked into the kitchen. "What are you doin'?" he asked, closing the door. "Cooking you lunch." Dean shook his head, and sat on the couch. "If I say no, your gonna do it anyway?" he called, laying little Dean down in his arms. "Pretty much." the lady called.

It was 4 o'clock in the afternoon, and little Dean was asleep in his room. Dean had fallen asleep watching television, but was woken up, when Ryder walked into the apartment. He looked over at her, and frowned. Her eyes were red and bloodshot, she'd been crying. "Ry, what's wrong?" he asked, sitting up slowly. "Uh, Dad called today." she said, softly dropping her bag and walking over. "Yeah?" Dean said, worry written all over his face. "His cancer's back. It's inoperable." she said, new tears falling over her cheeks. Dean's heart stopped in his chest, he slowly sat up and carefully pulled her into his arms. "I'm sorry." he whispered, rubbing her back lovingly. She leaned her head into his neck, sobbing quietly. She'd never been overly close to her father, but she did still love him, and he was still her father.

"Don't be sorry. It's not your fault." she said, her voice soft. She moved back realising that she was probably hurting him. Moving across to the otherside of the couch, she turned her head down the hallway. "He's been down for an hour. Should be awake soon." Dean told her, pulling himself up against the arm of the couch. "I fed him before, shoulda heard the burp he did." Ryder grinned up at him. "Thanks." she whispered, a soft hand touching his very tender face. Dean shuffled closer, and pulled her close again. "Does he want us to go up there?" Ryder leaned against him carefully. "Nah. Said he needs to be alone for a while. He'll come here when he's ready." she whispered. Dean wrapped his arms around her and slowly laid back down. She was crying again, so he just held her, arms tight around her. His eyes looking back at the television, knowing if he looked at her, he'd get upset himself. "Does he know how long he's got?" he asked, brushing her hair with his fingers. "No." She looked up at him, wiping away her tears. "He didn't want to know."

It was 5 o'clock when their son started making noise. Ryder had fallen asleep in the armchair in the middle of studying, Dean smiled, standing slowly leaning on the arm of the couch for support. He leaned over and picked up her notes, reading over them. "How you know what this stuff means is beyond me." Dean said, placing her stuff down on the coffee table. Ryder was studying part-time to complete her medical course. She had wanted to be a nurse since she was young but never really had the motivation to do it. Dean made his way down to the nursery and poked his head in, watching his son kicking his legs underneath the small covers. He walked to the crib and lean against the frame. Soft blue-green eyes locked with pure green. "Hey there." Dean said, his voice soft and loving. A gummy smile found it's way to the small infants mouth. Dean smirked, rubbing his hand on his son's small tummy. "Your gonna be a Daddy's boy aren't ya?" he said, leaning over and picking up the smiling child, wrapping him in a thin blanket.

Dean sat back down on the couch, his son in his arms. A yawn echoed in Dean's ears, and he turned. "Why hello there." he said, smirking at Ryder's tired face. "How long was I out for?" she asked, yawning again. "45 minutes." he told her, frowning with discomfort. "How are you feelin'?" she asked, standing up and stretching. "Sore." Dean answered, truthfully. "Called Mike before. Gave me a second day." Ryder picked her son up out of his arms, and gently placed him in the pram that was next to the couch. "Lift up your shirt." she ordered, squatting infront of her injured husband. "Ry, I'm fine." he said, looking down at her. "I wasn't askin'." she told him. Dean sighed and lifted his shirt slowly. Ryder's frown deepened when she looked at his torso. "Damn it, Dean. I think they're broken." she said, looking up at him. Dean shrugged, looking into her worried eyes. "I'm okay. I promise. Nothin' I haven't done before." Ryder touched his purple abdomen, her touch making him jump a little. "Man, where have your hands been. They're freezin'." Ryder smirked, feeling for something. When Dean pulled away she knew she'd found it. "You've either broken or fractured at least 3 ribs."

Dean shook his head, "Yes, Nurse Winchester." he said, leaning down to kiss her. She turned her head away laughing. "Sorry, relationships with patients are against hospital policy." she stated, turning back and capturing his lips. "Even pretty ones like me?" he asked, hands rubbing her arms. "Especially pretty ones like you." she said, kissing him again. "But I can keep a secret." Dean laughed and pulled his shirt down. "Enough with the poking me." Ryder sat on the floor, staring up at Dean. "What?" he asked, slightly confused. "I'm just lucky, that's all." she said, standing and walking into the kitchen. Dean chuckled and sat back into the couch, frowning at the reminder of his sore ribs. "I hate werewolves." he said, his voice hard.

* * *

Ryder stood outside of the small church, her 6 month old baby in her arms. Dean standing next to her, sunglasses covering his bloodshot eyes. "Da." little Dean said, a small frown on his tiny face. "It's alright, baby." Ryder said, turning to face her son. His hand grabbed hold of the V in her black dress. Dean's strong hand came to rest on Ryder's lower back, he turned and kissed her temple, resting his cheek against her dark hair. Dean's boss had passed away three days earlier, after being hit by a drunk driver on his way home from the shop. Dean had been with him only minutes before, he'd offered to close up for Mike. Mike had been one of Dean's closest friends since he'd started working at the mechanics. The only one who'd really accepted him from the beginning. Ryder lifted her free hand up two Dean's arm, rubbing it sympathetically. She'd gotten on quite well with the guy, but hadn't really spent as much time with him. His wife on the other hand, had helped her through her pregnancy. "Da." came a soft voice. Ryder felt Dean smile into her hair, "He's tryin'." came his husky voice.

"He is." she said, pulling the back of her son's little black jacket down. She lifted him up onto her hip, and looked into his big green eyes. "You okay?" she said, turning back to her husband. Dean nodded, his face hard. "Your not are you?" He shook his head, pulling her closer to him. Her son's small hand grabbed the arm of her big black sunglasses. "No, baby." she said, taking his hand in hers. "Here, play with these." she handed him her keys, watching that he didn't hurt himself with them. He held them out to Dean, smiling. "Nah, kiddo. You play with 'em." he said, smiling warmly at his son. "Da." came the familiar little voice. Ryder hushed him, as people began entering the church. She looked up at Dean, "You think bringing him was a good idea?" she asked, taking her keys back when her son held them out to her. "He'll be fine. I'll take him out if he gets loud." Dean said, touching his son's tanned cheek. "I guess." Ryder said, following Dean up the stairs.

They sat near the back, not wanting to be too close to the family. Dean sat on the end of the bench, his hands together between his slightly open legs. Ryder sat next to him, her son on her lap, his small body laying back against her stomach. Her right arm holding him up, supporting him carefully. He could sit himself up, but she sometimes still worried about his little neck. She wound her left arm through Dean's right, eyes staring up at the coffin down the front of the church. Dean just sat there, his face hard, eyes fixed on the same spot as hers. He blamed himself for the accident, desperately wishing for their to be something supernatural behind it. She'd researched everything she could, but it was clear this was just a case of another person's stupidity, and not the work of the un-natural. Surprisingly, little Dean stayed quiet. His little eyes staring up at his father, searching his face for something familiar. The man he saw was different, a different Dean. Ryder leaned down and kissed soft blonde hair, her right hand holding onto his little one. She smiled sadly when he grabbed her thumb, his tiny fingers playing with her thin silver thumb-ring.

Ryder's head fell against Dean's strong shoulder, she was shocked when he laid his gently against hers. She sighed, when she felt a small tear hit her hair. She felt his free arm move, and fall back down again. She squeezed his hand, kissing his shoulder softly then looking back up at Mike's 17 year old daughter, who was talking about her father in such a proud, confident voice. Ryder looked down, knowing that she had little to no happy memories that involved her father, a small tear fell down her cheek when she realised, she hardly knew guy. Music began to play softly, and Dean stood watching as the coffin was carried past him, Mike's wife crying loudly as she walked behind in her daughter's arms. Dean turned to Ryder, who'd been standing behind him, her sunglasses pulled up onto her head. Her eyes watching her friend cry for her husband. She hadn't actually lost Dean, but she'd felt the pain of thinking she had. Dean took her hand, and they walked out of the church, stepping down the steps slowly.

"Dean, wait." came the same proud voice. Dean turned and looked down at Mike's daughter. "Mom wants you to help us with the store." Dean frowned, and looked at her. "I was going too." he said, his voice confused. "No, she wants YOU to run it. You know it better than Joe." Ryder looked up at him, shifting her son to her other hip. "But, Joe's been there longer." he said, frowning still. "He told Mom that you were better suited for the job." the girl said. Dean looked down at Ryder, who shrugged at him. "Uh, sure. Yeah, tell her I'll do it." he answered, smiling gently down at the girl. "Thanks Dean." she said, pulling him into a tight hug. She turned to Ryder, and smiled. "Your a lucky girl." she said, quietly. Ryder watched the girl make her way back to her mother. "God, what I would have done to have my mom at that age." Ryder said, turning back to Dean. "Did I just get a promotion?" he asked, confused. "Kind of. She just wants you to help her." she answered, rubbing her son's back. Dean leaned down and took little Dean from her arms. "My turn." he said, holding the infant against his chest.

"Let's go home. I can't look at her like that anymore." Dean said, turning towards Ryder's car. Ryder nodded, "I'm just gonna go see if she needs anything okay?" She turned, and walked away Dean watching her go. "What's wrong buddy?" Dean said, looking down at his son. Dean lifted his sunglasses of his face, resting them on top of his head. His son just kept staring at him, "Daddy's okay. Just a little sad." he said, pulling the baby's jacket down. "Da!" he gurgled. Dean smiled, "Yep, that's me." His son rested his head against his shoulder, his green eyes looking towards his mother. By the time Ryder had managed to pull herself from Joan's tight embrace, little Dean was asleep in Dean's arm. "Sorry. She kinda broke down when I got there." Dean nodded, and started walking. "She want anything?" he asked, as they made their way to her car. "Nah, just my shoulder to cry on." she replied. Dean nodded, following her. "Why don't you wear dresses?" he asked, casually. She stopped walking and looked up at him like he was crazy. "Cause I don't think they suit me." she said, looking down at her body. "That one does." he replied, as he carefully place his son in his capsule.

* * *

Ryder sat on the living room floor, her son infront of her. Dean was due home soon, he was probably going to be in another bad mood. Sammy had skipped town 2 weeks ago, without saying a word, only leaving a letter. Dean had found it when he'd gone over to Bobby's looking for a part for a car he was fixing. The rumble of Dean's car came through the open window, the smile of her son's face grew wide, and Ryder giggled. "Who's that?" she said, tickling him on the stomach. "DA!" Ryder smirked, "You'll get it soon." She stood, and walked over to the window, eyes falling on her husband. He was leaning against the trunk of his car, staring down at the ground. She waited for any sign of anger, she wasn't disappointed. He shook his head, throwing his bag over his shoulder, and slamming the trunk closed. Ryder sighed and shook her head, returning to the floor with her baby. He crawled slowly across the floor, pulling himself into her arms. "What's wrong, baby?" she whispered, cuddling him. Footsteps were heavy in the hallway, and little Dean's grip on Ryder's shirt tightened. "It's only Daddy, baby." she whispered, brushing her hand over his little head.

The door opened, and a much calmer Dean entered the apartment. Ryder looked up at him from her spot on the floor, eyes searching his face. "You don't need to fake your mood. I seen you down there already." she said, looking back down at her son. Dean sighed and dropped his bag next to the door, slowly walking over and sitting on the floor across from her. He bit his lip and looked away, not really knowing how to apologize for his behavior the past couple of weeks. Ryder looked up at him again, beautiful eyes full of sadness. Most of which, was his fault. "Dinner's in the fridge, you know how to make the bottles, and you know where the baby food is. I'll see you when I get off." Ryder handed their son to him. Standing, and walking down to their bedroom. Her work placements had started, and she'd been doing nursing rounds at the local hospital. She emerged shortly after, a small bag on her shoulder. Dean sighed, he moved infront of the door and looked down at her. Her eyes darted away, she leaned up and kissed his cheek, squeezing out of the door behind him. Dean stood there, heart breaking at the idea that his wife couldn't even look at him.

"Da..Daa..Daddy.." came a soft voice. Dean smiled, and patted his son's back. Walking towards the kitchen, he stopped mid-way. "What did you just say?" he said, lifting his son up infront of him. "Da..Daddy." came the small unsure voice. Dean laughed, and kissed his son's cheek. "That's right!" The small child giggled, arms wrapping around Dean's neck. Dean walked down to the nursery and placed his son in his crib. Laughing when he frowned up at him, "Daddy needs a shower." he said, watching the small boy grab the nearest toy, and start swinging it around. Dean left the room, and walked into the bedroom he shared with Ryder, eyes falling on a picture of them. It was taken on his birthday, before he'd got into the alcohol. They were cuddled close, his head resting gently against hers, both genuinely happy. "Oh, what are you doin', you asshole." he said to himself, pushing the drawer closed and throwing his clean clothes over his shoulder. He walked into the small bathroom, leaving the door open so he could hear his son.

Once he was under the hot water, he felt his anger melt away. The hard water massaging his tight muscles, the steam clearing the angry thoughts from his mind. He looked down at the small tattoo on his forearm, remembering just how much that name meant to him, how much the woman who it belonged to meant to him. He chuckled at the memory that now clouded his mind, leaning his head back and letting the water beat down against his face. His thoughts had gone back to the night their son was concieved, well the night they believe he was.

-Flashback-

They'd been out trying to get information about their latest hunt, and Ryder had to cosy up to another guy to get it, to Dean it had sounded like a good idea before hand. After he'd grown to hate the guy for even looking at his girlfriend the way he did. Nothing had happened between the two, but the aim was to let the guy think something would, this way Ryder could find out what she needed, then tell Dean when she went back to him. All seemed fine at first, Ryder emerged from the bar her head held high, she got into the passenger seat of his car, and looked over at him. "So, he thinks that he's going mental. Said his best friend has been acting strange for a week now, angrier than normal. Sounds like a demon." she told him. Dean nodded and turned away, starting the car, and pulling out of the parking lot.

"Dean, say something." Ryder said, looking over at his face. "What do you want me to say? Good thinkin' 99?" he said, sarcastically, eyes never leaving the road infront of him. "What's wrong with you?" she replied, turning completely to look at him. "Nothin'." Dean spat. Ryder laughed, knowing exactly what was wrong. "Your jealous." she said, her voice taunting. Dean huffed and kept driving. "You actually think I'm interested in that guy? F*ck Dean it was your freakin' idea!" she said, her voice angry. Dean shook his head, "You didn't have do agree with me!" he said back, his voice matching hers. "How else were we going to get the information? Were you gonna go in there and shake your ass at him?" Dean turned to her, his eys full of anger. "NO! But I didn't think it would hurt this much watchin' you chat up another guy." Ryder shook her head, looking out of the window. "Your unbelievable. Your being ridiculous."

Dean shook his head, his frustration getting the better of him. "HOW AM I BEING RIDICULOUS!?" he yelled, turning down a dark gravel road, and slamming his car into park. "BECAUSE YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT I LOVE YOU!" she yelled, getting out of the car, her tanned legs shining in the moonlight. Dean got out of the car his breathing still heavy. "I love you Dean, more than you know. But you keep actin' like I'm gonna wake up one day and decide, "Dean Winchester is a bit of a loser. Maybe that guy would be better." But that's not how it works for me. THERE IS NO-ONE BETTER THAN YOU! Why can't you f*cking see that." she said, pointing her finger at him. "BECAUSE KNOW ONE HAS EVER F*CKING LOVED ME! Just the people that had too!" he yelled back, turning his back on her. "Fine, you wanna be like that. Be that way I don't care. Talk to me when your in a more pleasant mood." she said, throwing herself back into his car.

Dean stood staring out into the night, his breathing slowly calming down. He knew that the woman behind him was inlove with him, but the only other person to love him had shut the door in his face. He was terrified that one day Ryder would do the same. Only when she did it, it would tear him apart. He turned slowly, and climbed back into his car, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. "Your an asshole." she said, turning away. "Your a b*tch, that's why we work." he said, turning to her. Ryder looked at him, a smirk on her face. "Okay, that was your free shot. Next time you say that I'll hurt you." Dean laughed and went to start the car. "Don't. Can't we just stay here a while." she said, staring back out of the car. "What's there to do here?" Dean said, looking around the dark dead road. "Nothing, other than kiss or f*ck." she said, laughing at his smirk. Dean laughed, "You wanna have have make up sex, in my car in the middle of a deserted road?" Ryder laughed at Dean's tone. "Depends, are you offerin'?" Dean laughed and nodded, pulling her with him into the backseat.

Ryder laughed when they fell onto the leather seat, his hands already sliding up her singlet. His green eyes looked up into her darker ones, his hand pushing her hair out of her face. He pulled her down, his lips grabbing hers. Her hands ran up underneath his shirt, his hard body hot against her touch. She kissed him harder, as his hands ran up her legs up to the torn denim shorts she was wearing. His hands undoing them quickly, she laughed at his eagerness. She pulled his shirt off over his head, her eyes dancing down his gorgeous torso. Within minutes he was inside her, her hands holding her naked hips. Their lips never parting except to take a breath of air. The warm nights air making their body's sweatier, making their bodies slip against eachother. Dean's head fell back against the seat, his eyes closed, Ryder leaned down kissing his neck. She knew he was done, he was breathing hard, and he'd gone quiet. His hand ran slowly up her back, resting on the back of her neck. "Sorry, I was an asshole." he whispered, kissing her cheek. Ryder giggled, his stubble tickling her. "I'm sorry, I was a b*tch." Dean lifted her chin and looked into her eyes. "Don't apologize. You know I love it when you get all fiesty."

-End Flashback-

Dean stood looking in the mirror, eyes looking at his tired face. He knew make up sex wasn't going to make things okay this time. He had to work to make her even look at him again, afterall it was his fault she was so distant from him now. He tucked his t-shirt into his back pocket, and walked out of the bathroom. Poking his head into the nursery he found his son staring back at him. The minute his eyes fell on him, the small boy began crying. "Come on little guy, lets get some food into you." Dean said, picking his son up. Walking back into the kitchen, he sighed looking at the small bit of paper with his wife's neat handwriting on it. 'We're your family, too.' was all it said. Dean looked into the little green eyes of his son. "So, which one do you want? Fruit or chicken stuff?" His son frowned up at him, "Ah, of course the chicken." Dean said, picking up the little jar of food.

* * *

"Nurse Winchester?" a small female voice came. "Yes." Ryder said, turning eyes falling on her supervisor. "Mandy had to go home early. Could you take this patient?" Ryder nodded, taking the file from the friendly lady. "Sure." The woman walked away, and Ryder read the room number. She walked down the long corridor, reading the woman's name. "Ellen Lennons, huh?" she said to herself. Ryder walked through the door, "Jake, is it?" she asked the young man sitting beside the bed. "Yes, are you the new nurse?" he asked looking up at her. Ryder smiled, "I sure am." she said, picking up the clipboard from the end of the bed. She went about her jobs, answering all the questions the young man infront of her asked. "Have you ever had to sit here, and watch your mother like this?" Ryder shook her head, "I haven't seen my mother since I was young." The boy looked away, "How old were you?" he asked, his hand holding his mother's. "I was six." Ryder said, writing the woman's vitals down on the board.

Ryder finally looked at the woman's face, and her eyes widened. The woman was the image of her mother, down to the very last detail. "Are you okay?" Jake asked. "Uh, yeah. Fine." she answered, looking up from the body in the bed. "I have to go and finish my rounds. If you need anything just buzz me." Ryder turned quickly and left the room. She walked back to the nurse's station eyes fixed on the file. "Honey, are you alright?" her boss asked. Ryder nodded, "Just a little tired." Her supervisor looked her over then walked away. Ryder desperately wanted to talk to Dean, but couldn't bring herself to do it. She was still annoyed with the way he'd been acting towards her.

"Miss Winchester?" came Jake's voice. "Mrs. I'm married." she said, turning to face the boy. "I couldn't help but notice you look alot like my mother. I feel bad asking you this, but were you adopted?" Ryder stared at the young boy, he was so sweet and obviously confused. "No." she answered, looking at the time. Ryder shook her head, "I have to go finish up my rounds." With that she rushed off, her mind running a mile a minute. She didn't need to ask, she knew that the woman in that room was her mother, she had barely aged at all. Could that boy be her brother? or maybe he was adopted? All she wanted to do was go home, go to bed, and hope that in the morning this was all a dream.

"Ryder Winchester, you've got a telephone call.." came over the P.A system, and Ryder rolled her eyes. There was only one person who called her at work, and she couldn't be bothered with his moodiness. Ryder walked to the nearest nurse's station and picked up her call. "Hello.." she said into the phone. "Ry?" Her heart stopped. "Sammy? Where are you?" she asked, leaning on the counter. "Uh, I don't wanna say. How is he?" he asked, knowing Ryder wouldn't tell Dean he'd called. She sighed, "Foul. He's always angry." she answered. Sam paused, "Please, don't tell him you spoke to me." Ryder frowned and traced her finger on the desk. "Why did you go?" she asked, this was their way of answering questions. "Cause I was sick of him sacrificing everything for me. I thought if I left he'd stop." Ryder frowned, "He misses you. Somedays he doesn't even talk to me." Sam chuckled, "Typical Dean, huh?"

"Yep." she answered, looking behind her. "Just clams up and hopes I'll for get about it all." Sam was playing with his knife, she could hear it. "Do you still love him?" Sam asked, his voice worried. "Sam, I'm not leaving him. Of course I still love him. I just wish he'd let me in." Ryder looked at her watch and yawned. "I gotta get back to work. Take care, Sammy. Please call him or something, just let him know your safe." she said, before saying goodbye. She hung up the phone and walked to her next patient's room. "This is the worst night ever." she said to herself.

* * *

It was mid-night when Ryder silently entered the apartment. She locked the door behind her, and kicked off her sneakers. She turned, and jumped at the sight of someone sitting at the kitchen table. "Hey." Dean said, looking up over a cup of coffee. "Did I scare you?" Ryder slowly walked over to the table, pulling her light blue scrubs shirt over her head. "Kinda." she said, walking into the kitchen. Dean shook his head, and continued filling in the order forms that sat infront of him. "How longs he been down?" she asked, her back still facing him. "Two hours, and yes I fed him." Dean said, taking another sip of coffee. Ryder sighed and looked out of the window infront of her. "Dean, why are we actin' this way?" she asked, letting her head fall forward. "Cause I'm a jerk." he said, throwing his pen down. "And I'm a b*tch." she said, eyes staring down at her wedding ring. She heard Dean move, and walk over. His arms wrapping around her waist.

"Babe, I'm so sorry." he whispered, his lips brushing against her ear. Ryder leaned back against him, her legs were sore, and she just wanted him to hold her. "Dean I need you right now. My dad's getting real sick, and for two weeks I've been dealin' with it alone." she whispered, her hands falling on top of his. Dean kissed her neck, his cheek leaning against her's. What could he say to that? "I'm sorry.." he said quietly. "I know." she answered. "Dean said his first word today." Ryder's eyes snapped open, and she turned in his arms. "He said Daddy.." Dean finished, smiling at the adorable look on her face. "He.. I missed it." she said, slapping her forehead. Dean chuckled and pulled her closer, chin resting on the top of her head. "I love you, Dean Winchester." she said, looking up at him. He laughed at the use of his surname. "I love you too, Ryder Winchester." he replied. She leant up and kissed him, breaking from his arms, and grabbing a yoghurt from the fridge. "I thought you would be sick of that stuff. You ate enough of it when you were pregnant." Ryder poked her tongue out, and shoveled another spoonful into her mouth. She pulled herself up onto the bench, sitting eye level with him.

Dean had a sad look in his eyes still, and Ryder couldn't ignore it. "We'll be okay. This is just one of those hurdles we have to get over." she said, putting down her yoghurt, and wrapping her arms around his shoulders. "There will be no doors slamming in that pretty face." she said, her scrub covered legs on either side of Dean's denim covered hips. "Are you tryin' to seduce me?" Dean asked, his hands resting on the counter behind her. "I don't know. Is it working?" she countered. Dean chuckled, and moved closer. "I've always had a soft spot for nurses." he answered, winking at her. Ryder leaned her head back, a happy laugh leaving her mouth. "I've always liked a guy who was good with his hands." Ryder giggled, as Dean slowly kissed up her neck. "Stop. Your stubble is tickling me!" she gushed, pushing his head away from her jaw. He pulled her off the counter, and walked slowly to their bedroom.

"Seeing as tomorrow is Sunday. I think it's fair to say we can party." Dean smirked, dropping her softly onto their bed his body hovering above her. "You think?" Ryder said, crawling backwards to the pillows. "I think so." Dean said, grabbing her scrubs and pulling them down a little. Ryder laughed as he leaned down against her, his lips pressing softly against hers. "No fair. Your topless already." she mumbled, Dean laughed and pulled her scrubs off. "Oh well. Less to take off." he answered. Ryder's hands found their way to his button, quickly she had his jeans undone, pushing them off his hips as he kissed her. Within minutes they'd found their rhythm. His hands holding hers, their fingers tangled together. "F*ck YOU!" came an angry voice from next door. Ryder looked up at Dean laughing, "Think his jealous?" she asked, laughing. Dean nodded, and laid down against her naked body. His head resting on her naked breast, her finger's running through his short hair. He pulled the sheet up over their legs, leaving their torsos uncovered.

Ryder's head tilted back as Dean pushed up into her, his breath hot on her chest. His left hand, holding tightly onto her right. Her left hand was covering her mouth, she'd been moaning and was getting a little carried away. She didn't want to wake up her son. Dean looked up and smiled, pushing her hand away. "Your weird." he breathed, kissing her hard. Thrusting into her harder, grunting softly into her mouth. That was all it took to send her over the edge, her legs tightening around his. His hand squeezing her's tightly. Things weren't perfect, but they were getting better. Dean no longer had a fear of Ryder leaving, and Ryder knew that she still had all of Dean.

* * *

The next morning Dean woke up next to Ryder, her naked back facing the ceiling. His arm was draped protectively over her small body, her hand pressed on his chest gently. This was something she did alot, her way of knowing for sure that he was still infact alive, his heart beating steadily under her soft touch. She rolled towards his, her forhead coming to rest softly against his chin. She moved her arm, leaning it over his side her hand falling against the muscles on his back. He kissed the soft skin of her brow, strong arms holding her tight. "Daaaaaaa!" came the call of their 6 month old. They both chuckled, Ryder went to get up, but was stopped. "I got it." He looked down into her eyes and smiled. "Just wait a minute." Dean told her, waiting for his son to call again. They heard a toy hit the floor, and a small cry. "Daaa..Daddy!" came the little voice. Ryder looked up at Dean, her eyes lit up sparkling softly. "Looks like he wants you this mornin'." Ryder told him, leaning over and throwing his boxers at him.

"That's only cause I don't normally get to see him in the mornin'." Dean drawled, pulling his shorts on, and leaving the room. Ryder sat up, pulling the sheet up around herself. For the first time in two weeks, she was happy. She smiled as Dean walked out of the nursery, bringing their son into her. His little eyes grew wide, and he waved his arms around. "Hey there, baby." Ryder said, grabbing her son from Dean's arms. She placed him gently in her crossed legs and smiled down at him. "Da..ddy." he said, pointing behind him. Ryder nodded, and kissed his little cheek. "Very good, baby." she said, happily. Dean turned and walked down into the kitchen. Ryder sang softly to her little boy, watching his eyes light up. "You're gonna look just like your daddy." she said, looking into light green eyes. He clapped his hands together. "And, mommy's not letting you outta the house til your 30. If you look like him you'll be bringin' in the girls." Ryder laughed at the little boys frown.

"30 is a bit much. 25 sounds good." Dean answered, handing her a warm bottle of milk as he sat back on the bed. "If he is a man-whore like you were, I'll be so angry." she threw back, laughing at her husband's face. "I wasn't a man-whore! I was just good with the ladies." he said, wiggling his eyebrows. Ryder shook her head. "Until I rejected you?" Dean's hand came to rest on his heart. "That did actually bruise my ego." Ryder laughed, "Good, you needed a reduction." She looked down at her son, her hand lazily holding the bottle to her sons lips. He was holding it on his own pretty much. Looking on from where he sat, a flashback of Ryder holding his son for the first time came into his mind. He desperately wanted that happiness back, he wanted her to look at him that way again. She turned back to him, eyes falling on his, a sigh escaped her lips. She lifted her son up to her shoulder, and rubbed his back. "Dean, things don't fix themselves over night." she said, her free hand patting her husband's cheek.

He nodded, leaning into her touch. "But, they fix a little." she told him. He kissed her hand and moved closer pulling the sheet back over his legs. He didn't speak, just watched. He wasn't angry, he was disappointed with himself. He had everything he'd ever wanted, and he came close to losing it all because of his own stupidity. He knew he could speak to her, he knew Sammy leaving had upset her too, but still he kept her in the dark. He didn't even tell her what was in the letter. Ryder's head came to rest on his chest, their son's face only inches away from her's. "Who's a cheeky boy?" came Ryder's gentle voice. His son's giggles made their way to his ears, a smile creeping onto his face. "What you laughin' at, hey?" Dean said, his hand running through Ryder's hair. "Daddy!" the little boy said, small finger pointing. Dean smirked, "We need to teach you some new material, kiddo?".

Dean sat up a little, Ryder's head now leaning on his stomach. "I don't want him to grow up." Dean said, honestly. Ryder looked up at him, a small sparkle in her eyes. "Me neither." she replied. Little Dean crawled out of Ryder's arms and up next to Dean, his little head comng to rest on his father's elbow. Dean looked down and chuckled, "Come here, bubs." Ryder sat up, and grabbed the t-shirt that had been tucked into the pocket of Dean's jeans the night before. She pulled it over her head, and let the huge shirt fall over her body. "I forgot how big this shirt was." she said, upon recognising it. Dean laughed, "You fill the top part a little more now." he said, his free hand making a gesture of a big breast. Ryder shook her head, and fell back next to him. "Your still a hornbag." Dean leaned over and kissed her, "Don't be like that. You love me this way." he drawled.

* * *

ONE MONTH LATER..

Ryder sat eyes fixed on the body in the bed infront of her. Her eyes watching his chest slowly rise and fall with help from the ventilator tube that had been forced down his throat. His tanned skin was now a very pale white, and the dark rings under his eyes almost made him look dead. She looked up into his face, his light hair standing out less now that his skin was so pale. "I'm sorry." she whispered, tears falling from her eyes. She'd left her son with her friends at the nurse's station, she needed time alone with him. Her hand finally let go of his, coming up to wipe away her tears. He'd been alone when this had happened, no one found him until early this morning, the hospital had called her after her supervisor had found a picture of her in his wallet. Her heart had broken when she'd heard how long he was alone for.

The door opened behind her, and clicked to a shut. Soft footsteps made their way over to her. She looked up as the man next to her squatted down infront of her. "Ry, I'm so sorry." he said, looking up at her. She looked away from him to the body on the bed. "Why did he have to be alone?" she asked, voice almost a whisper. Dean stood, and sat on the arm of her seat, his arm wrapping around her shoulders. "Because that's what he wanted." he whispered. Ryder leaned into his strong embrace, eyes closing as he tried to comfort her. "Is Dean okay out there?" she asked, looking up into warm green eyes. "He's fine. They're all gushin' over him." Dean told her. Ryder smiled sadly, her eyes falling back on her father. Dean's arm tightened around her, his lips pressing softly against her temple. "Hey, Ry honey. He's gettin' anxious." came her friend's soft voice from the doorway. "Uh, I'll get him." Dean said, kissing her cheek before getting up.

--

Dean stepped outside of the room, closing the door behind him. "How's she doin'?" Mandy asked. Dean sighed and scratched his head. "Better than I thought." he said, heading towards the nurse's station. His son was crying, he new before he got there. "Oh, what's all that about, huh?" he asked, leaning down and picking the distraught baby from his pram. "Daddy.." he said, green eyes full of tears. "Alright buddy." Dean said, patting the child's tiny back. "We don't know what's wrong with him. I just fed him, and Ryder changed him just before." Mandy said, looking up into Dean's face. "Nah, he just gets like this when one of us is down. He's done it since he was young." he answered, trying to calm his son down. The small blonde girl nodded, walking around behind the desk. Dean turned, softly humming as he paced the small area. "Come on now. It's alright." he whispered. "Mommy.." the little boy moaned. "I know, kiddo. But your not allowed in there."

Dean heard the nurses whispering behind them, but decided to leave them to believe he hadn't heard their conversation. "That's her husband?" one of the older nurses asked. Mandy giggled, "Yeah. Spunk or what?" she whispered back. "He's gorgeous." the older nurse whispered back. "That child has no need to worry about being ugly." Mandy giggled, as Dean turned back around. "Okay ladies, that's how you stop a baby from cryin'." he said, adding a cheeky wink in for the hell of it. "Your really good with him." the older nurse said, watching the little boy stare up at him with adoration. "I've had practise. I helped my dad with my kid brother." Dean said, honestly. "Mandy, hear that he's got a brother." the older nurse said, purposely embarrassing the younger woman. "Oh, Sammy lives outta town." Dean said, looking apologetically at the younger woman. "Shh you two." the girl said, burying her face in her hands.

"Car.." the little boy said, eyes wide. "Yep. Daddy's car is downstairs." Dean said, shifting his son to the other arm. "Your getting good with this talkin' thing." he said softly. Dean jumped when a hand touched his back, "Hey." he said softly when he looked down into Ryder's eyes. "Jackson's with him now." Dean nodded, and started squatting to put his son back into the pram. "Mommy!" the little boy called, Ryder leaned down and grabbed him, placing him gently on her hip. "Hey, baby." she said, kissing his little cheek. "Car?" he said, looking towards Dean, who was leaning on the handle of the pram. "Yeah, car now." she said, smiling. "CAR!". The two nurses laughed, "Someone loves the car." Dean nodded, his eyes wide. "Wouldn't get out if he didn't have to." Ryder laughed, "You wouldn't either." Dean looked surprised. "She's my first love!" he said proudly. Ryder looked to her friends and laughed. "Here's my husband, the charmer." she said, walking towards the elevator.

* * *

Ryder was alone in the large foodcourt at the hospital, working hard to finish her assignment over dinner. Between raising a child, doing her placements, and her father being sick, she had almost no time to do her homework. Their neighbour Mrs. Jenkins would take Dean during the day, so Ryder could spend time with her father, and Dean didn't have to take time off work. She felt bad leaving him there, knowing he didn't like being away from her or his father for too long, but this was something she'd been working for. She only had three weeks left, and things would ease up. "'Scuse me miss, is this seat taken?" came a rather familiar voice. She smiled up into the loving eyes of her husband. "What are you doin' here?" she asked, pulling her feet off the seat across from her. "Can't a guy come and visit his wife on her break?" he asked, frowning at the diagram infront of him. Ryder laughed, and stopped what she was doing. "Where's DJ?" she asked, taking a bite of her dinner.

"Jackson's at our place. He's watchin' him for me." Dean said, leaning his elbows on the table. "Babe, your stressing yourself out." he said, looking into her tired eyes. Ryder nodded her head, "Your not wrong." she said, pulling her hair back into a ponytail. "Have you seen that Lennons lady again?" Dean asked, his voice almost a whisper. Ryder nodded, "It's creepy, she's awake now." Dean scrubbed his face and looked behind him. "Is it her?" he asked, looking back into her face. "It is." she answered, writing her last line. "Doesn't recognise me. Probably doesn't help that I'm Nurse Winchester. If I was Singer she'd probably freak." Dean nodded, eyeing off the cup infront of her. "Are you drinkin' coffee?" he asked, a smirk on his face. "Ew, No way!" came her usual answer. Dean chuckled, and stole a frie from her dinner. "She does stare alot." Ryder said, returning to their conversation. "I would too. I mean you look just like her."

"I have to get back to work." Ryder said, tiredly. Dean smiled, and stood up. "Want me to take these home?" She nodded, watching him pick up her books. He walked with her back to her station, trying his best to cheer her up. "Thanks for comin'." she said, leaning her head on his shoulder as they walked. "Your welcome." he said, wrapping his arm around her shoulder. "Excuse me?" Ryder turned, eyes falling on Ellen Lennons. "Yes." Ryder said politely, stepping out of Dean's arm. "I.. this is going to sound strange. You weren't born a Winchester were you?" the woman asked. Ryder shook her head. "No, I got married, almost a year ago now." she said, turning to Dean. "May I ask what your maiden name was?" she asked, eyes falling on the handsome man behind her nurse. "Uh, it was Singer." Ryder said, quietly. The woman's hand came up and covered her mouth. Ryder stepped back, bumping into Dean. "It's okay." he whispered, rubbing her back gently.

"Ryder?" she whispered, stepping forward. Ryder nodded, taking the woman's arm in her hand. "Yeah." A tear fell out of her mother's eye. "Oh, baby." she said, pulling Ryder into a tight hug. "My babygirl." she whispered, crying into her daughter's neck. Ryder just stood there, her arms wrapped around the woman tightly, eyes staring blankly at the wall infront of her. "Where did you go?" she asked, finally. Her mother pulled away, her hands framing her daughter's beautiful face. "I had an accident. Lost my memory, and was taken in by Jason Lennons. Baby, I wouldn't have ran out on you." she whispered, touching her daughter's cheeks. Ryder looked confused so the woman continued. "I've known everything for 10 years, I just couldn't find you." Tears fell from Ryder's eyes. "Jake?" she whispered. "His your brother. I was pregnant when it happened." Ryder nodded, her hands falling to her side. Dean had put her books down on the desk behind him, his hands coming to rest on her forearms.

Ellie's eyes fell on Dean's, and she took a step backwards. Hands moving from Ryder's face to her own. "Are you okay?" he asked, looking worried. "Darlin' when did you meet him?" Ellie asked her daughter. "Two or Three years ago." Ryder answered, looking up at Dean. "Did he save you?" she asked. Dean nodded. "You look exactly the way I saw you." she said softly, her hand touching his chin softly. "Come on, you have to rest. I'll get into trouble if they catch you out here." Ryder said, helping the woman back into her bedroom. "You'll end up sick again. Then you'll never get home." Ryder pulled the covers back over the woman. "Where's your brother?" the woman asked. "He's at home with my son." Ryder answered. "Married and a mother. I've missed alot." Ellie said sadly. "Your father?" Ryder frowned and looked away. "Upstairs, in ICU." Ellie's eyes grew sad. "I never forgot him you know. I read in the paper he re-married." Ryder nodded, turning back to Dean. "They divorced a year back."

Dean watched as Ryder switched back into nurse mode. Checking that everything was in place, making sure the woman was as comfortable as she could be. "I want to see him." the woman said, softly. Ryder nodded, "After dinner. I'll see if I can get you up there." she whispered. "You grew up to be as beautiful as I saw." her mother said softly. "She looks just like you." Dean said, from his spot next to the door. "Down to the last detail, almost." The woman smiled, "She's stronger though." Ryder frowned, trning back to Dean. "Alright. I have work to do. You have a son to take care of. And you need to rest." Ryder pulled Dean out of the room, and closed the door behind her, leaning heavily against it. Her eyes full of tears, her heartbeating frantically in her chest. "Hey." Dean said, pulling her into a tight hug. "What's wrong? You should be happy." he whispered. Ryder shook her head, pulling herself closer to him. "I don't know what to do." His hand ran down the back of her head, his other arm tightening around her. "We'll work it out." he said, softly.

* * *

Later that night Ryder took Ellie up to the ICU ward, wheeled her into the room that had been her father's home for two weeks. He was breathing with the help of an oxygen mask, and rarely ever woke up. She left her mother alone in the room, not wanting to intrude on them. 21 years they hadn't seen eachother, and this was how they crossed paths. It was pretty depressing to Ryder, her mother recovering from a car accident, her father slowly dying in a hospital. Ryder made her way back down to her station, talking to Mandy about what had been going on. Jackson walked up to the nurses station, his face pale and his eyes wide. "Is it true?" he asked. "Yeah." Ryder said, hands playing with her stelthiscope. Jackson looked down, arms resting heavily against the desk. Ryder stood and walked around, pulling her brother into a loving hug.

"She looks exactly the same. Just older." Ryder told him, pushing his hair out of his face. "Please stop hiding." she told him, kissing her stubbled cheek. "Ryder, that's your bother?" Mandy asked. Ryder turned, and smiled. "Yep. My brother, my hero." she said, proudly. "Jackson, this is Mandy." Ryder said, nudging him. Jackson looked down at her, a shifty grin on his face. "Quit it. Sorry, she's a bit crazy. She married a hornbag." Jackson said, smiling politely at the pretty young girl. "Dean's not a hornbag." Mandy said quietly. Ryder and Jackson looked at eachother and shared a giggled. "Not anymore." Jackson said, leaning against the counter again. "Are you a hornbag?" Mandy asked, leaning on her side of the counter. "Depends." came Jackson's reply. Ryder shook her head, and went back to her paperwork. "Please." she said, giggling to herself.

Ryder looked down at her watch, and got up. "So, Jackson. You have a girlfriend?" Mandy asked, with a cute smile. Ryder walked past and headed to the elevator, "No. Why do you ask?" came her brother's southern drawl. She stepped in and pressed the button for the ICU floor. Once she got there, she took her time, not wanting to walk in and find her mother in tears. She stopped outside of the door, and composed herself, opening it quietly and looking in. "Ellen, I have to take you back to your room." Ryder said, quietly. "Please darlin' call me Ellie." the woman said, staring down at the man infront of her. "Ellen isn't my name." Ryder nodded. "Come on now. I gotta get you back to bed." She grabbed the handles, and turned the chair slowly, heading back out of the door. "Jackson's downstairs." Ryder said, as she pushed the wheelchair into the elevator. "He is?" Ellie asked. "Yep. He's kinda flirtin' with my friend. But yeah he's there." The woman's breath caught in her throat when the door opened.

"Is that him?" she asked, leaning her head back so she could see Ryder's face. She nodded, and wheeled her to the desk. "Hey, Jacky." Ryder said, tapping his shoulder. He turned and looked down at the woman in the wheelchair. "Mom?" he said, as he squatted down infront of her. The woman nodded, tears falling down her cheeks. "Jackson." she whispered, eyes searching every part of his face. Ryder walked over to the desk, looking at her friend. "He asked you out didn't he?" Ryder said, her voice raising and falling like a teenage girl in a good mood. Her friend nodded, "He's totally gorgeous." she said, smiling at Ryder. "Ah, I wouldn't know. Him being my brother and all." Ryder said, chuckling. "You don't wanna see that do you?" Mandy asked, touching Ryder's arm. Ryder shook her head, "Rather not. Kinda in a good mood at this point. I get to go home soon." Mandy smiled, and moved back going back to her paperwork.

A couple of minutes passed, and Ryder took Ellie back to her room. The woman was needing less help with getting into bed, her cuts and bruises were beginning to fade. "You'll be outta here in no time." Ryder said, as she put the wheelchair back in the corner of the small room. "What does your baby look like?" Ellie asked. Ryder smiled, and thought for a second. "He looks like his daddy." she said, her voice full of joy. "How old is he?" Ryder sat down and smiled. "He's 8 months old." she said, her eyes sparkling. "He's starting to walk. Mostly just walks along the couch, holding on to the cushions." The woman nodded, smiling. "What's his name?" she asked. Ryder looked at the woman, finally recognising the face on her. "His name's Dean Jackson. But we call him DJ to make it less confusing. Well not to him, to eachother." Ryder answered. "I gotta go, m shifts over. I'll see you tomorrow though. Bye, Mom." Ryder said, with a smile, leaving the small bedroom.

Ryder walked back into the nurse's station, and finished her last bit of paperwork. Laughing at her brother's flirting. "Mommy." came a tiny voice. Ryder looked up, but could only see Dean. She stood, and saw little hands holding onto Dean's thumbs. "He wanted to get down. So I helped him. Took ages to get here." Dean said, lifting the small boy up. "Hello, baby." she said, laughing as the little boy kissed her cheek. "Your a bit happier now." Dean said, kissing her cheek as well. "Yeah, it's bad huh?" she said, looking into Dean's beautiful eyes. "Terrible." Dean said, sitting his son on the desk. "Talk to her much?" he asked, pointing down the hallway. "Uh huh. She asked about kiddo." she said, pulling her bag onto her shoulder, and clocking off. "Mommy!" the little boy said, wrapping his arms around her neck as she lifted him onto her hip. "Oh, darlin' your gettin' big." Ryder said, kissing his nose.

"Jacky, I'll see ya later." Ryder said, kissing her brother's cheek. "Okay, bye little man." he said, ruffling his nephew's hair and turning back to the small blonde girl, ignoring Dean's taunts. Dean walked next to his wife, watching as she played with her son. "Miss him did ya?" he asked, as they stepped into the elevator. "Always." Ryder said, looking up at him. "What about me?" Dean said, a playful pout on his lips. Ryder laughed, and slapped his shoulder. "Of course I did." she said, pulling him down by his necklace kissing him softly. "Good." he said, chuckling. Things had gotten alot better between them, they had slowly gotten their relationship back on track. Ryder had that look in her eyes everytime she looked at him, the look that made him melt. Everytime he looked into her eyes all he saw was love. That was what he'd been longing for.

He stood there in the cool night air, his long shaggy hair blowing in the breeze, his large frame leaning against the cool black metal of a car he'd grown to depend on. He'd seen his brother walk into the hospital only minutes before, and knowing him he'd be out just as quick. He wasn't wrong, no more than 10 minutes later, Dean emerged with Ryder and their son. Ryder's eyes fell on him first, her mouth dropping open. She passed little Dean over to his her husband and ran. "Sammy!" she yelled, running and jumping on him. Her arms wrapped around his neck in a tight embrace. "Hey sis." Sam said, placing her gently back on the ground, laughing at her face when he called her that. Her hands came up to his cheeks, eyes searching his. "You look great." he told her, kissing her cheek. He looked up to his brother, he could see the mixture of emotions in his eyes. Ryder took her baby from Dean's arms, laughing as the little boy kept pointing up at Sammy.

"Dean, I'm -" Sam started, only to be cut off by Dean's hand raising. "Shut up." he said, pulling his brother into a hug, hands grabbing handfuls of the taller man's jacket. "Don't ever do that to me again!" Dean said, slapping his brother on the back of his head. "Dean!" Sam said, rubbing the spot. Ryder shook her head, and moved to put her son in the car. "Big." the little boy said, head tilted back so he could see Sam's face. "He is very big. That's your uncle Sammy." Ryder said, her voice sweet. "Daddy, car?" he said, his big eyes turning on Dean. "Uh huh. Right now buddy." Dean said, as Ryder buckled the baby into his seat, and getting in next to him. "You still shotgun forever, Sammy?" she asked, looking up at him. "Hell yes. I'm never sitting back there." Dean laughed and walked around the car. "Get in, b*tch." he said, slamming his door shut. "Grow up, jerk." Sam replied.

Ryder leaned forward, arms resting on the black leather of the front seat. "So where were you?" she asked, tilting her head to the side. Sam sighed, and looked at Dean out of the corner of his eye. "Kansas." he replied. He'd gone there, because he knew that was the only place that Dean would never go. "Oh." was all Ryder said, her hand gently rubbing the back of Dean's neck. "Why did you come back?" Dean asked, eyes fixed on the road ahead of him. "Because family is everything. I missed you guys like crazy. I just needed time alone to sort through everything that happened the passed couple of years. All I've done is drive from town to town. I never had a chance to think everything over." Sam said, turning to face his brother. "I didn't mean for you to get hurt." he said, softly. Dean looked over and smirked. "I'm just glad you're back." was Ryder's comment. Dean nodded his agreement.

Sam knew Dean was happy, but he could also see his pain. His little brother had left him again, but this time wasn't so bad. This time he wasn't stuck with their father, but a wife and child. A family of his own, a family that Sam thought, had no room for him. After two months of thinking, he came to realise that they needed him, as much as he needed them. That's why he'd decided to return to Texas. "Mommy? Big, home?" came the little voice. Sam turned and looked at the small boy. "He talks good." he said, looking into big green eyes, that were so much like his brother's. "He does." Ryder said, rubbing the baby's cheek with her finger. "Yep, Sammy's comin' home with us." she said, a smile wiped across her face. "Sa.." the little boy said, a frown on his face. "Close kiddo." Dean said, as they rolled to a stop. "Sammy.." Ryder said softly. Dean got out of the car, and sauntered into the supermarket, leaving Sam and Ryder in the car with little Dean. "Saa..mmy." Ryder clapped, and giggled, "Very good, baby." she said, kissing her infants hand.

"He's pretty smart." Sam said, leaning over the backseat, and playing with the boy's hand. "SAMMY!" he said, smiling his little hand grabbing hold of one of Sam's long fingers. "He walkin' yet?" he asked, laughing at the little boy's excitement. "Almost. Just needs a little help." Ryder said, turning her eyes back to Sam. "We missed you." she said, planting another kiss on Sam's cheek. "I missed you all, as well." Sam said, looking down at his nephew. "He looks just like Dean." Sam said, looking up at Ryder. "Dean." the little boy said, pointing to himself. "That's right, sweety. Your Dean." Ryder said, ruffling her son's hair. He giggled up at her, eyes full of love. "Dean seems good with him." Sam said, remembering Dean as a child. "Dean's fantastic with him." Ryder said, smiling as her husband sauntered back to the car. Sam sat back in his seat, his mind on a memory of his brother that he'd always held close to him.

-Flashback-

Sam was sitting alone just outside of the gate of his latest school. Blood running from the corner of his mouth, he'd been the latest victim of the school's biggest bully. The guy was his height, and twice his size, this made it alittle more difficult to fight back. He'd held his own for a good 10 minutes, the guy had gotten sick of his blocking and started to fight dirty. Sam looked down the street for any sign of his brother's car. Dean hadn't been in school today, he'd skipped to work downtown, the money their father had left them was getting low, and he wouldn't let Sam be the one to work. Sam stood, and looked again, he'd had enough of waiting so he started to walk, kicking an empty can as he went. He stopped when he heard a loud rumble and the echo of AC/DC drift down the street. He turned and pulled the passenger side door opened, throwing himself in angrily slamming the door after him. "Dude, what the hell happened?" Dean asked, lowering his sunglasses to get a better look. "Nothin'." was all Sam said.

Dean caught a glance, of a tall boy cackling as Sam hung his head low. Sam heard Dean growl softly, as he pulled the car over. "Dean can we just go home, please?" Sam begged, looking up towards his brother. "In a minute." Dean threw his sunglasses down on the seat, and got out of the car. Walking casually around the car, nodding at the guy infront of him. "Hey, kid. Come here." Dean said, a casual grin on his face. The guy looked at his friend, and sauntered over. "Yeah." he said, looking down at Dean. "How old are you?" Dean asked, standing with his legs open, arms folded across his chest. "Seventeen. Why?" Dean nodded, and unfolded his arms. "So I won't feel bad doin' this." Dean threw his fist into the guy's jaw, his other hand pulling the guy down his knee bashing into the guy's stomach. "That kid you beat up was my kid brother. You hurt him, I'll hurt you double that. Got it?" Dean said, pushing the guy over. "Got it." the guy moaned. "Same goes for you, skinny." Dean said, poiting to the small guy behind the big one.

-End Flashback-

"Thanks." Sam said, turning to Dean. Dean looked at Sam his face full of confusion, "For what?" he asked, slowly. "For always bein' there for me." Sam answered, looking back out of the side window. Dean smiled, and looked back at the road. "It was my job. One I actually didn't mind, by the way."


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: OMG I am soooo sorry for not updating, I've been sick and RL and work got in the way. I hope you can forgive me and not be upset with me, i came back with a new ch. lol i hope you enjoy this next one plz do tell us how you like it so far.**

**reviews are like christmas presents 3**

* * *

ONE MONTH LATER..

Ryder woke up to a smell that she'd only smelt once before, and her stomach flipped inside her. She was too scared to open her eyes, incase her worst fears were true. She heard the sound of footsteps coming closer, and got ready for whatever came her way. When she opened her eyes, she came face to face with herself. "Mornin' sunshine." her own voice said. Ryder shivvered and sat up against the wall, hands tied behind her back. "Go to hell." Ryder said, staring her clone in the eyes. "Oh, that wasn't very nice." she replied, kicking Ryder in the face. Ryder grunted, and looked back at the clone. "You really need to do better than that." Ryder drawled, spitting blood at the shifter. "Oh, just wait til I get alone time, with Dean." it said, it's voice lingering on the N in his name. "He's not stupid, he'll know your not me." Ryder said, laughing at the shifter's weak attempts to frighten her. "A baby wouldn't know the difference." Ryder's eyes snapped up, "Don't you f*ckin' go near my son." she said, her voice full of anger.

"You can't stop me pretty, your a little tied up right now." it said, putting a bag over it's shoulder and strutting out of the basement. Ryder sighed angrily, looking around for anyway out. She couldn't let that thing near her son. "F*CK!" Ryder spat, pulling her arms, the rope digging into her wrists. "Son of a b*tch!" Her left thumb dislocated, and her hand slipped free. "Damn it!" She turned slightly, pulling at the ropes, occassionally bumping her thumb. She kicked her feet free, and pulled herself up. "Would help if I knew where I was." Ryder said, looking around the crappy room. "OH! THAT B*TCH TOOK MY FREAKIN' CAR!" Ryder yelled kicking the box next to her, eyes looking out of the small window above her.

* * *

Dean was sitting at the kitchen table, his son sitting on his knee. He was trying to read the newspaper, but he was too worried. Ryder was two hours late home, and he couldn't get through on her cell. Her boss had told him she'd left when she was supposed to, and Alan was back home with Jackson now. "Man, she's probably just stuck in traffic." Sam said, sitting infront of Dean with a bowl of cereal. "Traffic? At 7am? Look out there and tell me there's traffic?" Dean said, pointing to the window. Sam shrugged, "I was just trying to calm you down for his sake. He's catchin' on." Sam said, pointing down and the small child who was staring up at Dean, eyes asking a million questions. "Mommy.." he said, his voice sad. Dean rubbed DJ's little back, eyes looking to the apartment door, "She's comin', kiddo." he whispered, trying to comfort himself aswell.

DJ started crying, his head resting into Dean's stomach. "Oh, buddy. Come on now, I'm still here." Dean said, standing and flicking his head to the door. Sam nodded, "I'll go down and see if I can find anything." Dean nodded his approval and paced the small hallway, his son in his arms. "Daddy.." his son whispered, through tiny sobs. "Yeah, kiddo?" Dean said, lifting the boy up to look at him. "She gone?" the little boy asked. Dean shook his head. "Naw, she's just lost. Daddy, will find her though." DJ nodded, and leaned back again Dean's shoulder. Dean couldn't stop the single tear that fell from his eye. What if she is gone? he thought to himself. The door opened, and Ryder breezed in, dropping her bag on the table. "Hey." she said, happily. Dean frowned looking at the woman. "Your two hours later, and all you say is 'Hey'?" Dean asked, stepping into the kitchen. "Oh, is that the time? Sorry Dean." she said, pushing passed and walking to their bedroom. "Where's Sammy?" Dean asked, slowly opening the bag. "At Bobby's." came her answer.

Dean looked down into the bag, finding nothing but weapons. "Oh that's right." he said, closing it and stepping back into the doorway. Ryder walked down to him, eyes looking into his. "Your so silly." she said, her voice more feminine than normal. "Are you feelin' okay?" Dean asked, eyes looking down into the carpark through the window behind him. "Never better." she said, her voice more confident. Her hands snatched the boy from his arms, and she kicked Dean in the stomach. "Now, I'm perfect." she said, watching him double over. "DADDY!" the boy cried. "Shut up!" Ryder screamed, putting the child down in his pram. She punched Dean in the face, watching him fall unconscious to the floor. "Sorry, Dean. But you were askin' too many questions." she said, dragging him to the table, and tying him to a chair. She pushed the pram down to the nursery, and shut the door. "Man. I hate kids." she said, laughing as she walked back into the kitchen. Gun in her hand, watching as Dean started stirring.

* * *

Sam walked along the quiet road, eyes searching for any sign of his sister-in-law. He had a weird feeling in his stomach, something was definately wrong, this wasn't like Ryder. "Sammy!" he heard her call. "RY!" Sam ran to her, his hands falling on her face. "What happened?" he asked. Ryder shook her head, "A f*ckin' shifter." She was nursing her busted hand against her chest, walking fast. "She wants DJ." Sam's eyebrows shot up, "Why?" he asked. "Do they need reasons for anything?" Ryder said, eyes falling on her car in the parking lot. "DAMN IT!" Sam's eyes followed her, and they took off at sprint. "How long have you been down here?" Ryder asked, as they ran up the stairs. "Bout half an hour." Ryder swore, and kept running, pushing her legs to go faster, throwing her weight against the door to their floor. Sam pulled her arm, "Don't rush this you know how they are. And you don't have a gun." he warned.

"Sam the car?" he nodded, and ran back down. "Stay there." he said, sternly. Ryder huffed, but did what she was told. She knew Sam was right, she was no good to Dean and her son dead. So she leaned against the wall, and slid down falling into a sitting position on the ground. She was a mess, she'd caught her reflection down town. Her hair was ratty, and falling out of her ponytail. Her face had little cuts all over it, and her lip was busted. Sammy was on his way back up, so Ryder killed time by tying her hair back properly. "You ready?" Sam asked, handing her a gun. "Damn right." she answered, walking slowly towards her home.

* * *

"What do you want from us?" Dean asked, looking up at the woman he loved, feeling a slight hatred. "You, and your baby." was all the thing said. Dean shook his head, "She's gonna kill you." His voice was strained, his was in pain. The shifter laughed, "If I don't kill her first." Dean's eyes grew wide, as he heard footsteps outside the apartment. "Don't worry, Dean. I'll make you forget about her." it said, leaning down and kissing him. "You're sick." he spat, turning his head away. "I'm sick. YOUR SICK!" it screamed, punching him again. Her hand grabbing the short hair on the back of his head. "Now behave, or I'll kill your precious brother too." She let go, and quietly stood next to the door. Watching it as it opened, and held her gun up. Dean's eyes were closed, the last punch had dazed him.

The shifter pulled the trigger, the bullet piercing into Ryder's side. It kicked the door shut in Sam's face, and locked it. "Welcome home." it said, squatting over Ryder's heaving body. White eyes, staring down into the heavily bleeding woman's. "Oh, does that hurt?" it said, poking the wound. Ryder screamed, her head tilting back. "Too bad." it said, standing and walking back over to Dean, kicking Ryder's gun away as she did so. "You f*ckin' b*tch!" Dean yelled, eyes glued to his wife's heaving body. "Oh, come on now Dean. It's not like you would miss her." She said, sitting on his lap, hands running down his arms. Sam was trying to get in, a loud thumping coming from the door. "Dean.." Ryder moaned, her voice soft. She was dying. Dean looked back at the shifter, eyes piercing into her's. "There's two things you shifters will never learn." Dean spat, looking up into her eyes. "What would those things be?" she drawled, boredly. "To tie a strong knot." Dean said, pulling his arms forward, pushing the woman off his lap. His booted foot kicking her onto her back. "And, never mess with a Winchester."

He squatted down, looking into the creepy white eyes. Leaning over and grabbing Ryder's gun. "She's gonna die, if you keep wastin' time." the shifter spat. Dean looked over at his wife, pulling the trigger, the bullet pierced the shifter's heart. Dean shook his head, pulling Ryder's rings off it's left hand. "F*ck you." he said, rushing to his wife. He let Sam in and fell to his knees. "Dean.." she said, her eyes looking blankly up at him. "It's gonna be okay." Dean said, pulling her into his arms. Sam rushed down into the nursery, and picked up the hysterical child. "Ryder, don't do this. Come on please. Open your eyes." Dean said, his eyes watering up. "I'm so tired Dean.." she said, her hand touching his face. "Dean, come on we have to get her to a hospital." Sam said, tapping his back. Dean looked up eyes falling on Mrs. Jenkins. "Boy, I'll take care of him. Just get her help." Dean looked confused, pulling Ryder into his arms standing slowly. "I've known who you are the whole time. NOW GO!" she said, taking the boy from Sam's arms.

Minutes later they were in the car, Ryder wasn't breathing now, and Dean's heart stopped in his chest. "Baby, please don't do this to me." he said, tears falling onto her face, as he tried his hardest to get her to breath. Sam sped to the hospital, knowing if they wasted time she would die. "She breathin'?" Sam asked from the front seat, tears stinging his own eyes. "Barely." Dean choked. The hospital came into view, and Sam felt the slightest relief. He jumped out of the car, grabbing the attention of two paramedics. "You guys need help?" they called, Sam nodded. "Holy, sh*t." the taller one said, looking down as they lifted her onto the trolley.

* * *

A shivver ran down Dean's spine as he entered the room, a rush of memories assaulting him at once. His hand covered his mouth, as a tear fell down his cheek. His wife was laying there motionless, a thousand different wires attached to her body, each one doing it's own job to keep her alive. She'd died twice when they were trying to get the bullet out, but they'd brought her back each time. Her skin was paler than he'd ever seen, dark rings around her beautiful eyes. Her left hand was plaster, she'd broken it trying to get free. The eerie sound of the ventilator made his tears fall more frequently. He'd seen her like this once before, and this time it hurt much more, because all he could do was sit there and watch as she slowly died on their living room floor. Her heart was beating slower than they wanted, and was showing no signs of waking up. He sat in the chair next to her, his heart slowly shattered, with every sound of the machines keeping her there.

His left hand came up to hold her right one, his eyes never leaving her face. He was terrified, he couldn't imagine life without her now, especially with their son now. "Please, come back." he whispered, his hand squeezing her's. "I can't do it without you." He winced as he moved, his right arm was in a sling against his chest. His shoulder had been dislocated, his elbow broken. "She fought just like you." he whispered, his left moving to touch her face. "I didn't fight back as much as I should have. But I could never hurt you, even if she was a shifter, she still had your face." Dean frowned, his eyes watering up again. He didn't brush them away, just let them fall. He didn't care who saw, he just wanted her to wake up. He wanted her to stop hurting, so she could kick his butt for letting a shifter get the upperhand on him. The door opened and Sam walked in, DJ asleep in his arms. "Mandy said to bring him in, said it's fine cause she works here." Dean nodded, turning to his brother.

"You get rid of it?" he asked, carefully taking his son into his free arm. "Yeah. Was kinda weird." Sam said, taking the seat next to his brother. The little boys hand grabbed hold of Dean's t-shirt, his little head moving into the crook of his elbow. Dean looked down, sad eyes watching the child sleep. "He cried himself to sleep. I couldn't stop him." Sam said, eyes stuck on Ryder's motionless body. "It's okay." Dean said, his voice catching slightly. "You got him?" Sam asked, as Dean carefully moved the child up to his shoulder. "Yeah." Dean said, quietly. Sam nodded, "Want a coffee?" he watched as Dean nodded. "'Kay, I'll be back soon." With that Sam stood, and left the room, leaving Dean with his family. Dean leaned his head against his son's sleeping body, the scent that all babies have drifting up into his nose. His eyes fixed on Ryder's heartmonitor, his was tired but didn't want to sleep. Not when she was still critical anyway.

"What are you doin' awake, hey?" Dean said, when he felt his son moving in his arms. "Daddy.." the boy said, tiredly. "Yeah, I'm here buddy." His little green eyes looked so tired, but his son refused to go back to sleep. Dean's right arm moved in the sling, his hand rubbing his son's back softly. He wouldn't turn him around, he didn't want him to see his mother this way. So he gently rubbed his back, his soft voice humming in his little ear. "Sing, daddy." the little boy said, hand rubbing his eye. Dean nodded, and held the boy close. Singing softly to the child, knowing he would go to sleep soon. Dean looked down at Ryder, a tear falling down his cheek. He could do this alone, he just didn't want to. "I love you." he whispered, as his son breathed evenly against his neck.

* * *

She could hear his begging, the sadness in his voice but she couldn't see him or even respond. She knew this feeling and she hated it. 'Dean, I'm sorry.' she thought upon hearing his soft sobs. 'How did I get here?' she asked herself, trying to remember the events that led her to this bed. "I love you." she heard him whisper, his voice strained. 'I love you too. Oh god, I love you.' she thought. She could hear all of the beeping, it was starting to annoy her, she just wanted to hear Dean, his beautiful, loving voice. She wanted to see him again, those beautiful green eyes that always made her feel safe. A warm hand touched her, and she felt her world move around her, eyes snapping open. "What the hell?" she whispered, as she looked down at herself. She turned, her eyes falling on her husband, tears falling down his handsome face. Her son sleeping against his strong chest. "Oh, Dean." she said, hand touching his cheek. "He can't see you." came a soft female voice. Ryder turned slowly, looking at the source of the voice.

The woman was beautiful, her hair was long and blonde, her eyes just as beautiful as Dean's. Her face was soft and friendly, her smile warm and loving. "Who are you?" Ryder asked, slowly walking over to the woman. The woman's hands came to rest on Ryder's cheeks. "Mary Winchester." she said, smiling at Ryder. "You're.. Am I dead?" she asked, looking into Mary's eyes. "No, sweety. You just wanted to see him, so I showed you." Mary answered, looking towards her son. "Are you an angel?" Ryder asked, softly. Mary nodded, and let her hands fall. "You're very beautiful." she whispered, smiling. "Dean finally got his act together." Ryder frowned turning back to her husband. Mary looked sadly at her son, watching his pain escape his body in the form of silent tears. Ryder stood there, just watching as Dean fell apart infront of her. "I don't want to leave him." she said, finally pulling her eyes away. "You're not." Mary whispered, her blonde hair shining in the bright light of the room. "He's never been this happy. Not since he was a little boy." Mary said, sitting on the chair next to her son. "Then he met you. He turned his life around so much, and I'm proud of that. But the hunt will never be over for him." Ryder nodded sadly. "John drilled it into him. I love my husband. I just wish he could have left Dean out of it."

Ryder was shocked, she couldn't believe her eyes. Mary Winchester, was sitting infront of her. Her soft hand brushing through Dean's short hair, and he didn't even flinch. "Please, don't raise him to be nothing but a hunter." Mary said, looking down at her grandchild. Ryder nodded, "I gave it up, to give him the life that Dean and I never had." Ryder whispered, sitting down on the bed. "You can't save me, can you?" Ryder asked. "No, but I can give you a little push." Mary answered. Ryder nodded, her eyes glued on the woman. "How long have you been with him?" Ryder asked, looking at her mother in law. "I never left him." she whispered sadly. Ryder's eyes widened, and she felt her cheeks grow hot. "Not when, you two were alone." Mary said, laughing at Ryder's face. "Oh." Ryder said, her voice relieved. Mary smiled, "I was there when you brought him into the world." Ryder looked down at her son, "You did better than I did. I swore at John, you just yelled at Dean." Ryder chuckled. "I broke his finger." Mary's eyes showed her laughter. "I know." Dean stood, sitting on the bed next to Ryder. Mary watched on as he just watched her sleep. "He's crazy about you. Has been for a while." Ryder's hand was resting in the middle of his back, her sad eyes on the nape of his neck.

"I know." Ryder said, letting her hand fall to the bed. "I wish things could be different. I would have loved having you around." Mary said, walking back over to Ryder. "You would have been the perfect daughter in-law." Ryder smiled, and looked up. "Your exactly how he told me you were." she whispered. Mary smiled, "I want to show you something." Ryder frowned, "What?" Mary walked to the door, pulling it open. "This is how you were really supposed to meet Dean Winchester." she said, taking Ryder's hand and stepping over the threshold. The sun was bright, and Ryder hand to bring her hand up to shade her eyes. There was teenagers everywhere, excitedly talking. "This is my first day at college." Ryder said, her hand still in Mary's. She saw herself, standing with her friends a bag on her shoulder and books in her arms. She looked different to how she had that day, the first real noticable thing, was friends. "This is your life how it was supposed to be." Mary said, walking closer to Ryder's younger self. "Your mother never disappeared, and I was never taken."

Dean walked by his face younger, he was a year older than Ryder. "His older than me?" Ryder said, looking back to Mary. "Dean struggled with school. He was kept down." Mary said, honestly. He walked over to another guy leaning against the building. His eyes fixed on her younger self, a grin plastered to his face. "Oh, he's not gonna hit on me is he?" Ryder said, rolling her eyes. Mary laughed, shaking her head. "Watch." A bunch of jocks made their way through the crowd, the biggest one bumping Ryder violently. "Watch it, Jerk!" Ryder said, as her books flew everywhere. "Oh, a fiesty one." the guy said, turning back to her. Mary smiled, as Dean pushed himself off the wall. Eyes fixed on the guy, who was beginning to corner Ryder. "Back off." she spat, taking a step back. Dean had enough, and sauntered over a bag over his shoulder his hands in the front pockets of his torn up jeans. "Hey, you always pick on girls. Or is she just lucky?" Dean asked, standing infront of Ryder. The jock looked him over and laughed. "Who are you?" he said, turning to his friends. "Nobody, just didn't like the way you were treatin' her." Dean said, standing casually infront of her. "She got lippy." he guy said, pointing over Dean's shoulder. Ryder lifted an eyebrow from her spot off to the side. "She was just tellin' you what you are." Dean said, taking a step back, making Ryder step back also. "Dude, stop spittin' on me." Dean drawled.

"You think your funny?" the guy asked, grabbing the front of Dean's shirt. Dean turned to Ryder and chuckled. "Naw, I know I am." Dean said, pushing the guy off him. The guy shook his head, and turned away. "You'll get yours." he said, pushing his way through his friends. "Yeah, I'll mark it on my calender." Dean called after him, turning to the three girls behind him. "Uh, sorry. I just thought you needed a little help." he said, squatting and picking up a book. Ryder looked up at him smiling, "It's okay. Nice to see someone who actually cares about others." she heard herself say. Dean scratched his head and smiled. "I'm Ryder, by the way." she said, holding her hand out to him. Dean took it and smiled. "Nice name. Dean Winchester." he said, his other hand touching his stomach. Ryder smirked, she knew what the younger her was about to say. "Like the rifle?" Dean chuckled and nodded. "Like the rifle." Mary smiled, looking down at Ryder. "He was actually supposed to be a gentlemen." Ryder giggled, "He can be at times."

Everything when black, and they were back in the hospital room. "You two got married younger, and had a boy and a girl. Dean and Elizabeath." Mary told her, her soft hand coming to her cheek. "He owned his own Mechanics downtown, and you became a nurse." Ryder smiled, "I still wouldn't trade this life for that." she said, looking lovingly at Dean. Mary leaned down and kissed her forehead. "Good. Cause soon you'll be living it again." With that Mary stepped back, her hand resting over Ryder's heart. Everything went black, again. The beeping was annoying her again, and she could hear Dean singing softly to her son. 'Great. Back here again.' she thought, just before the darkness took over completely again.

* * *

He sat there, staring blankly at the still form in the bed. His eyes lingering on her beautiful face, a face normally so animated, and full of life. But right now it was so emotionless. He shuffled the chair closer, being careful not to wake his son. Ryder's heartrate monitor began beeping more frequently, her heartbeat was getting stronger. "That's my girl." Dean said, his uninjured hand rubbing her arm softly. Dean brushed a strand of hair away from her face, his fingers lingering on her soft skin. He yawned, and sat back into his chair. He knew that he had to take his son home, the kid needed to sleep properly. Sam walked back into the room, and took in Dean's tired face. "Take him home. I'll stay with her. I'll call if anything changes." Sam said, squeezing Dean's good shoulder. "Just if somethin' goes wrong, or she wakes up. I want him to sleep through." Dean said, standing. He kissed Ryder's brow, and stood up straight. "Good thing I can drive left handed." Dean said, carrying DJ to the door. "Thanks Sammy." His brother smiled back at him. "She's my family too. Family means everything." Dean smirked, and closed the door softly.

Dean walked slowly down to his car, his son stirring in his arms. "Sorry, buddy. We're going home now, it's okay." he whispered, as he placed the tired child into his carseat. He sat for a moment, the fresh night air making his headache a little better. "Mommy?" the little boy said, pointing to the building. "Yeah, kiddo. Mommy's sleeping here." Dean said, looking down into his son's eyes. "Daddy, sad?" Dean couldn't help but smile. "Yeah. A little." he said, "Your startin' to make sentences. Good boy." he said, pulling himself up, and getting in behind the wheel. "Tell you what? You can keep me company tonight." Dean said, as his son started clapping in the backseat. Dean drove with his music down low, looking up into the rearview mirror every now and then. Dean actually felt relieved to be home, until her remembered that Ryder's blood would be all over the floor. He sighed, and carried his son into the apartment block. He got to the apartment and the door was open, he frowned then the smell of disinfectant travelled to his nostrils. "Oh, sweety. Are you okay?" came a voice Dean had come to love. "Not really." he said, laying his son down on the couch. Tears falling down his cheeks. "Oh, come here." Mrs. Jenkins pulled Dean into a hug, old hands rubbing his strong back.

"How did you know?" Dean asked, pulling back. The old woman sat down on the couch, hand rubbing the small boys stomach. "I know a few hunters. Your name has come up a few times. I heard you were the one who saved that girl." she said, pointing away from herself. Dean nodded, "Yeah. I was." he said, sitting in the armchair watching her. "This isn't your fault, dear. Those things are shifty." Dean nodded, watching his son crawl towards him. "I just had to sit there and watch." Dean said, pulling the boy onto his knee, watching as his small hands played with the silver ring on his right hand. "Ryder wouldn't like you blaming yourself. You killed it, it's gone. You can't change what's been done. But you can trust in her strength." Dean nodded, as the woman stood. "Get some sleep, sweetheart. You look terrible." Dean walked to the door, his son waving to the lady. "Night, and thank you." Dean said, closing the door. "Bed now?" the baby said. "Bed now." Dean said, walking down to the nursery, and changed his son into a clean diaper, and some pajamas. "Better?" Dean asked, picking the boy up. "No." came his reply. "What's wrong?" Dean asked, frowning. "Tubs." the little boy said. Dean smiled, and leaned over. Picking up a small soft teddybear. "TUBS!" DJ said, pulling the bear into his little arms. "Better?" Dean asked again. "Yes." came his reply.

"Good." Dean said, walking out of the room, and into his bedroom. He could smell Ryder's perfume as he walked in. A smell that normally comforted him, but tonight made him miss her. He put DJ down on the bed, watching as he crawled up to Ryder's pillow and let his little head fall. "How am I supposed to change with this thing on?" Dean said to himself, taking the sling off carefully. He pulled his top off, wincing as his arm moved. "Life would be easier without shirts." Dean said, quietly. "Nooooo.." the little boy said, giggling at his father. "You laugh now. But wait til your older." Dean said, pushing his jeans down, and climbing into the cold bed. "Night." the little boy said. "Night, buddy." Dean said, placing a spare pillow under the blankets behind the child. DJ cuddled into his side, the little bear held tightly in his hands. Dean smiled sadly, letting his eyes close.

* * *

"UP!" a little voice called, little hands grabbing his cheeks. "Okay, okay." Dean said, opening his eyes and taking the little hands in his. "I'm up." he said, pulling himself into a sitting position. His son crawling up into his arms. "Your a funny kid." Dean said, pulling the child into a hug. "Silly." the baby said, hand grabbing Dean's chin. Dean got out of bed, and walked into the bathroom. "You need a bath." Dean said, pretending DJ stunk. "BATH!" Dean laughed as he turned on the taps. He sat on the floor next to the tub, and watched his son hold himself up against it. "Mommy home?" DJ asked, throwing a toy into the small amount of water. "Naw, kiddo. But we'll go see her soon." Dean said, turning the taps off and checking the water. "You ready?" he asked, watching the smile spread across the child's face. His arms flew up into the air, and he lost balance falling on his diapered bottom. DJ started giggling hysterically, looking up into Dean's eyes. "Ah, kiddo. You'll get it soon." he said, undressing the small child. "Fun.." the little boy said, between giggles. Dean shook his head, as he lifted his son into the tub. His hand resting protectively on his little back. "You are definately your mother's son." Dean told his son, remembering all the times Ryder had tripped over herself. "Daddy.." the boy said, Dean looked down and was spashed with a tiny handful of water.

"One day, I'll stop falling for that one." Dean said, tickling the little boy. He went about his job, cleaning the little boys skin, laughing as he innocently played with his toys, mumbling babytalk to himself. Dean found it strange how easily he'd adjusted to being a parent, it was very different to raising Sammy, but still had it's similarities. DJ rarely ever cried these days, and was always giggling to himself. "Done now." the little boy said, his green eyes smiling up at Dean. "Yep. Here we go." Dean grabbed a towel, and picked DJ up, gently wrapping him in the towel. Twenty minutes later, after showering himself, and feeding his son, he was ready to head back to the hospital. He leaned down and lifted DJ up against his shoulder, after putting his sling back on. He grabbed the small bag that had DJ's things in it, and headed to the door. He looked around the living room, making sure he had everything, then pulled the door open. Coming face to face with a woman from his past. "Hey.." she said, quietly looking up at him. "Hi.." Dean said, turning to lock the door. His son staring at the woman over his shoulder. "How are you?" she asked, looking at his back. "sh*t, actually." Dean said, squeezing passed and walking down the hallway.

"Dean, can you just stop for a second?" Cassie called. Dean stopped and turned, "Why? What do you want this time?" Dean said, his voice full of frustration. Cassie had only just noticed the baby in his arm. "You babysittin'?" she asked, pointing to DJ. "No. Is there something you want?" Dean said, turning back to the elevator. "I just wanted to see you again." she whispered, her voice sounding slightly hurt. "I think I've told you to leave me alone." Dean said, looking at her over his shoulder. "Dean, why are you bein' like this?" she said, standing infront of him. "Because if I remember right, you f*cked me over. Now you're comin' to me, askin' why I moved on. Cassie, just get lost okay." Cassie huffed, and walked to the staircase. "That girl has changed you, and it wasn't a good thing." Dean growled, and turned to her, ignoring the fact that the doors just opened. "Your f*cked." Dean said, looking at her, his hand coverin his son's ear, pressing the other into his shoulder. "Don't talk to me like that!" Cassie said, pointing her finger at him. "Oh, so it's fine for you to bad mouth my wife. But when I turn on you it's wrong?" Dean said, stepping towards her.

"Your married?" Cassie yelled. "YES!" Dean yelled back. "Daddy!" DJ screamed, tears forming in his eyes. "He's your's?" Cassie said, quietly. "Yes. Whether you like it or not. I've moved on, now get lost and do the same." Dean walked into the elevator, but was followed by her. "Daddy?" the boy asked, touching Dean's face. "Yeah, buddy." Dean said ignoring Cassie. "Bad." he whispered. Dean chuckled quietly. "Where is she?" Cassie asked, rudely. "In hospital." he answered, not looking at her. "Are you happy?" Cassie asked. "Not really. I'd like her to be here." Dean said, moving his arm in the sling. "What happened?" she asked, her voice a little calmer. "She got shot. Anymore questions?" Dean said, turning to her. "Is she okay?" Cassie asked. "No. She's not." Cassie leaned against the wall of the elevator, staring at Dean out of the corner of her eye. "What?" he said, angrily. "Never pictured you for the fatherly type." Cassie said, laughing at him. Dean shook his head, and turned away. "Right." DJ was frowning at her, his little hand holding onto Dean's sling. "Guess you didn't know me as well as you think." Dean said, stepping out of the elevator.

Cassie stood there staring after him, eyes piercing into his back. She loved this man still, and he wanted nothing to do with her. "Cassie, don't come here again. I don't want to see you." Dean said, as he shut the backdoor to the Impala. "FINE!" she yelled storming off. "Crazy b*tch." Dean said, getting into the car. His hands were shaking, she knew how to get on his nerves. He was furious, so he just sat back into his chair, and tried to calm down. His son started talking to himself in the backseat, Dean had no idea what he was saying, but found it funny. "Is that right?" he said, looking up into the rearview mirror. "Yep." the boy said, giggling. Dean chuckled and started the car. "Okay then." he said, as he turned out of the parking lot. Dean's mood changed as he stepped into the hospital, the reality hit that, Ryder wasn't working but was a patient herself. He sighed as he got to the room, and braced himself for the pale face of his wife. He pushed the door open, and found Sam asleep his head resting on the mattress next to Ryder's hand. He smiled sadly, and looked up into her face. Shocked at the change in colour, her face had a little more colour in it. "Mommy.." the boy said, as he turned and seen her. Dean frowned, and placed the boy down on the bed carefully. "Stay there, okay." DJ nodded, his little eyes fixed on his mother. "Drink?" the boy said, pointing to the tube in her mouth. "Naw, kiddo." DJ frowned, and took Ryder's finger into his hand.

Dean smilled, surprised the boy wasn't crying. His little eyes looking over her, his hand holding her finger carefully. "Beep." he said, mimmicking the machine that was showing his mother's heartbeat. A frown on his little face, looking up at Dean. Dean nodded, and the little boy moved a little closer. He was being so gentle, it was like he knew something was wrong. "Pretty.." he whispered, his little hand tightening on his mother's finger. "She is, huh?" Dean said, leaning forward. His hand running through her hair gently. DJ nodded, watching his father closely. His little head turned, and fell on an empty chair in the room. A smile on his face, Dean looked and frowned. "Who are you smilin' at, buddy?" he asked. The little boy giggled, and turned back to Dean. "Pretty.." he said, pointing a hand behind him. Dean's eyes scanned the room, and fell on his brother. "There's no-one there buddy. Just Sammy." His son shook his head, and went quiet. Dean frowned, and turned back to Ryder.

* * *

It was mid-day, and Alan was sitting out on a seat in the sun. His son next to him, both staring blankly into the trees ahead of them. "She's gonna be fine, dad." Jackson whispered, his hand on his father's shoulder. Alan nodded, his heart breaking as he did so. "I wish we could see her." Alan croaked, his voice hoarse from hours of crying. Jackson nodded, "Dean's with her. He said he'd let us know if anything changes." The phone started ringing, and Jackson stood. He slipped through the open door, answering it quickly. Alan stared out at the bright sky, begging whoever was listening to save his daughter. "Dean said she's doing better today. DJ isn't even crying." Alan turned and looked up at his eldest child. "That's always a good sign." he said, scratching his neck. Jackson sat back down, and looked at his hands. "Dad, you know how Ryder clammed up when she was 16." Jackson said, looking anywhere but at his father.

Alan nodded, "Yeah." Jackson sighed, and cleared his throat. "It was because something pretty bad happened to her." Jackson said, "She wasn't in a fight at school." Alan frowned. "What happened?" Jackson let his head fall forward, "She was, uh, raped pretty much." he said, slowly. "WHAT?" Alan said, his croaky voice straining. Jackson stood and moved away, "I was messed up, and she went missing. When I found her she was a mess." Alan looked up at his son, his eyes full of pain. "Why didn't she tell me?" he asked, looking away. "Because she didn't think you cared." Jackson said, truthfully. "All that mattered was Susan and River." Alan shook his head, and looked back at his son. "Is that how you two felt?" Jackson nodded, "Dad, it's how things were." Alan nodded, accepting the truth. "That's why she never visited 'til she started seeing Dean. Because he told her that things might be sh*t with you two, but your still her father." Alan turned away, "He's a good kid." Jackson nodded, "He is."

They sat there in silence, both thinking of Ryder. Jackson was angry because he hadn't been there when she needed him. Alan was breaking, his daughter had kept him in the dark for 11 years about that night. Both men loved her, but it was clear to Alan, that Jackson loved her more. "Your good to her." Alan said, winking at his son. "I'm just protective." Jackson answered. "Your her brother, your supposed to be." Alan said, chuckling at his son's bashfulness.

* * *

TWO WEEKS LATER..

DJ was laying on the bed, curled up on Ryder's good side. Eyes fixed on his mother's hand, his little hand wrapped around her finger. Dean was reading the newspaper, looking up occassionally to make sure his son wasn't doing something he shouldn't be. DJ had seen his father talking to her, so he would mumble softly to her. Dean would smile when he heard the babytalk coming from his son. Ryder's condition was getting better, her colour was almost back to normal, and her heart-rate was stable. The ventilater whirled, and DJ looked up. "It's okay buddy, that's normal." Dean said, putting the paper down. DJ turned his attention back to his mother, his little teddy pulled into his side. "Hungry?" Dean asked, looking into green eyes, that were now identical to his own. "Yep." the boy said, smiling at his father. "Bottle or Food?" DJ let go of his teddy and crawled towards Dean. "'Ood." the boy said. Dean chuckled, "Almost got it." He pulled his son into his lap and helped him eat his baby food. "Some?" DJ asked, pointing his spoon at Dean. "Naw, thanks kiddo." Dean laughed, when his son shrugged and stuck the spoon into his mouth. "Definately, her son." Dean said, softly.

Dean looked up and frowned. He thought he saw his wife flinch. He shook his head and looked back down, wiping his son's dirty face. A loud choking sound grabbed his attention. He looked up and Ryder's eyes were open, her hands trying to pull the tube out of her mouth. He put DJ down on the seat, he jumped up and pressed the call button, grabbing Ryder's hands carefully. "Babe, you can't do that." he said, his voice soft. Ryder looked up at him, her eyes full of worry. "It's okay. Just relax." he told her, as two nurses ran in. "Sorry, Dean. You gotta leave for a second." Mandy said, handing DJ up to him. The door closed, and DJ looked scared. "It's alright." Dean said, leaning against the wall. His heart was racing in his chest, a smile finally touching his lips. "Mommy.." DJ said, softly. His hand touching the wall behind Dean.

---

"Okay, Ry. Just calm down." Mandy said, brushing Ryder's hair from her face. The other nurse carefully went about removing the tube, Ryder's eyes never left her friend. Minutes later, the tube was gone, and Mandy was checking her over. "You gave us all a scare." Mandy said, as she finished. Ryder looked up at Mandy, as she pressed a button next to the bed. The mattress moved so Ryder was in a sitting position. "How long?" Ryder asked, her throat burning as she spoke. "Just over two weeks." Mandy said, sitting on the bed. "Dean's been here everyday. DJ would lay next to you for hours, chatting away." Ryder smiled, "Where are they?" she croaked. "Outside. I'll get them. I have rounds to start now anyway." Ryder grabbed her friends hand, and stopped her. "Thank you." she whispered. "Hey, I volunteered to be your nurse. My friend deserved the best." Mandy said, kissing her cheek before she left the room.

---

"Dean.." Mandy said, walking into the waiting room. "You can go back in now." Dean nodded, and stood up. His son, giggling excitedly in his arms. "Your crazy, kiddo." Dean said, as he pushed the door to her room open. "Hey there." Dean said, as he walked over to her bed. "Hey.." Ryder croaked, eyes glued on Dean's handsome face. "MOMMY!" DJ said, arms waving at her. "Careful, buddy." Dean said, as he let his son crawl up into Ryder's arms. "Hey, baby." Ryder whispered, her plastered hand coming up to brush her son's chubby little cheek. "Mommy missed you." she said, pulling her son into a tight hug. DJ wrapped his arms around her neck, being as gentle as he had been for the past two weeks. "He missed you too." Dean said, sitting on the bed next to her. "How bout you?" she said, her throat burning as she spoke. "Always." Dean said, his hand sliding into her's. He passed her the glass of icechips that Mandy had brought in. "That might help. I know what your goin' through." Ryder nodded, taking a mouthful and letting them slide down her throat.

"Come here." she whispered, laying her head back into her pillow. Dean slid along the bed, and stopped just short of her. "Dean, come here." she said, chuckling slight. "I was shot, I'm not contagious." Dean moved right up next to her, his face only inches away from hers. She leaned forward, and kissed him softly, smiling as he kissed her back. "That's better than any medicine they're giving me." Ryder whispered, looking back down at her son. "He's gone to sleep." she whispered, pulling her blankets up over him, her head falling lazily back onto the pillow. Dean's eyes never left her's, he'd forgotten how beautiful they were. "What?" Ryder whispered, her hand squeezing his. "I love you." he said, kissing her cheek. "I love you too." Ryder answered, leaning her head against his as he hugged her. "You get it?" she asked, as he sat back. "Course." he said, smirking. Ryder chuckled, "What happened to your arm?" Dean smiled, "You broke my elbow." he teased. Ryder slapped him softly. "I didn't DO anything." Dean laughed, and kissed her again. "Sure, that's what they all say." he said, his hand brushing through her hair. She yawned, her eyes locked on his. "He walkin' yet?" Dean shook his head. "You haven't missed it." he whispered. "Good." Ryder whispered, her eyelids getting heavy. Dean kissed her hand, and let her fall asleep.

* * *

TWO DAYS LATER..

She was alone with her son for the first time in two weeks. He sat between her legs playing with a little car Dean had brought for him. Her wound was healing slowly, and her headaches had finally stopped. "Brrrrrr.." DJ said, as he pushed the little toy car around infront of him. "Can Mommy have a look?" Ryder said, kissing the top on her son's head. He held the toy car up, laying back into her stomach. "Wow, Daddy got you a nice car, didn't he baby?" she said, looking at the small red Camaro. "Yep." the little boy popped out. Ryder smiled, and pulled the boy up, closing her legs underneath him. "Love you." the boy whispered, taking the toy car back. "Love you too, baby." Ryder whispered, her voice still scratchy. The boy carefully turned in her arms, little green eyes looking up into hers. Ryder giggled at the smile on his face. "What's all this huh?" Ryder said, rubbing his little cheek. The boy stood slowly and hugged her, his little hands grabbing her white t-shirt. Ryder hugged him back, her hand rubbing his back. "Your 10 months old, now. Your growing up too quickly." Ryder whispered, kissing her son's blonde hair. "Your gonna be walking soon.." Ryder said, smiling as the little boys eyes lit up. "Walk, now?" he said, looking hopeful. "When Daddy gets back." Ryder whispered, rubbing his back. "Cold..." the little boy whispered. Ryder picked him up carefully, so she didn't hurt herself, and pulled him under the blankets with her.

His hand was playing with her hospital bracelet, his little fingers turning it around her wrist. Ryder watched him, fingers running through his soft hair a smile on her face. "Mommy.." the boy said, through a yawn. "Yep." Ryder said, holding him tightly. He cuddled into her, his hand grabbing her thumb. Ryder smiled, and hummed softly watching his beautiful eyes slowly close. Ryder had been worried about having a child, she thought she'd be a terrible mother. But as soon as she laid eyes on DJ, she was inlove. Motherhood came naturally to her, which hadn't surprised Dean at all. She looked up to the door, as it swung inwards she smiled when Dean stepped into view. "Hey there, handsome." Ryder said, quietly. Dean smirked, and lifted a bag. "Thought you'd be sick of hospital food." Ryder laughed, "Who likes it to begin with?" Dean nodded, and leaned down. "Plant one on me." he whispered, Ryder kissed him and giggled. "Smooth, Winchester." she said, chuckling at his pleased expression. "He just go down?" Dean asked, sitting back in the armchair he'd grown to hate. "Yeah, loves that car." she said, pointing to the car she'd placed on the table. Dean chuckled, "Well, he's got two car fanatics for parents. What hope did he have?"

Ryder nodded, pulling herself up against the pillows a bit more. "Want me to move him?" Dean asked, sitting forward. "Nah, it's okay. I just have a sore butt." Ryder said, giggling. Dean laughed, and sat back his legs sitting apart. Ryder took a few fries from her dinner and stuck them in her mouth, watching Dean's eyes stare at her. "I'm fine, Dean." she said, smiling at his frown. "I know. I just can't believe I nearly lost you." Ryder didn't really didn't know what to say to that. "I should have been more cautious." Ryder said, looking down at her son sleeping against her chest. "Nah. You could have been ready and she still would have got you. That one was good at what she did." Dean said, his hand grabbing hers. Ryder looked back at him, her eyes sparkling in the light of the small room. "What?" Dean asked, looking up at her, a strange look on his face. Ryder smiled, she brought her hand up to his cheek, the memory of what his mother had shown her lingering in her mind. "Wanna know something weird?" Ryder said, tapping his cheek. He frowned, and nodded slowly. "You remember when I told you about my mum seeing you before I met you?" Dean nodded, taking a drink from his straw. "And you said you believe your Mom was an angel?" Dean nodded, putting his cup down.

"Well.. I seen her. I don't know when I seen her, but I seen her while I was here.." she paused and looked at him. His mouth was wide open, his food almost hanging out of his mouth. He closed his mouth and swallowed. "Are you serious?" he asked, moving to sit on the bed infront of her. "Yes.." she said, looking down at her hands. Dean lifted her chin, and smiled. "What happened?" he asked, his voice soft and soothing. "She showed me what my life would be like if my mother had never gone missing." Dean looked away slightly disappointed, "Yeah? What happened?" Ryder smiled, and told him the story, gently rubbing her son's back as she told him. "So, we were supposed to meet, either way?" Dean said, looking into her eyes. "We were, aparently." Dean smiled, and moved back to his seat. "I went to college?" Ryder nodded, "Hey, you don't have to answer this, but were you kept down at school?" Dean looked down, and nodded, "Yeah. I was." Ryder nodded, 'Damn, I really did see her.' she thought. "Can I ask why?" Dean sat back, and rubbed his hands together. "I wasn't the best learner. Had trouble in all the english type subjects, but was good at sports and maths." Ryder nodded, listening as her husband told her of his school days.

"I was good at english, but not maths." Ryder told him, pulling the blanket further up on her son's back. "What made you ask?" Ryder shook her head, "I have no idea.." Ryder didn't want to upset him, she just wanted to know about his childhood he doesn't always talk about it. "Daddy.." came a quiet voice. DJ's head turned and his eyes looked up at Dean. "Hey, buddy." The little boy sat up, and rubbed his eyes. Holding his arms out towards his father. "Have a good sleep?" Dean asked, as he rested DJ on his knee. "Yep." the little boy whispered. "Down.." the boy said. Dean frowned, and stood DJ up between his legs. His little hands tight on Dean's thumbs. Ryder moved closer to the edge of the bed, looking down at her son. "What are you doing cutie?" she asked looking down at DJ. "Playin' with my son." Dean said, looking up and winking. "Your funny." Ryder said, her voice sarcastic. DJ fell forward, and Dean's big hands caught him. "DADDY!!" the boy said happily. Dean chuckled, and stood him up again. "Try again, kiddo." Dean said, squatting down behind the little boy. DJ looked up at Ryder, who was encouraging him. "Come on, baby." she said, a smile on her face. DJ took a shaky step forward, his hands tightening on his father's thumbs.

"You know once he starts walkin' our job gets harder." Dean said, looking up at Ryder. "Oh well. It's all part of the journey." Ryder said, carefully pushing herself off the bed. Standing with her lower back leaning against the mattress. "Butt numb?" Dean asked, smiling. "Yep." Ryder said, her left arm leaning across her stomach. Dean didn't notice that DJ had let go of his thumbs, Ryder pointed down and he smiled. DJ was standing on his own, his arms in the air just incase he needed Dean. Ryder bent forward as far as she could without her side hurting, her hands reaching out for her son. "You wanna try and walk to Mommy?" she said, her voice warm. DJ nodded, and took a shaky step forward he started falling backwards, but Dean put his hand on his back. The little boy frowned, it was clear that he wanted to do this. "Good boy." Ryder said, as he took another step. Dean carefully took his hand away, watching as the boy walked shakily towards Ryder. DJ grabbed the material of Ryder's pants and smiled up at her. "Very good, baby!" Ryder said, as Dean lifted DJ up into his arms. "You did it!" DJ clapped, and looked up at Dean. "Your a smart kid." Dean said, kissing the boys cheek. "Down!" DJ said, Dean laughed and put him back down.

TWO WEEKS LATER..

Ryder had been home a week, and DJ had been following her and Dean around. Ryder couldn't play with him as much as Dean could, but she still found the whole thing gorgeous. She sat on the couch, facing the hallway where her son was trying to get Dean to chase him. "DJ, come here." Dean said, a smile on his face. "No." the child said. Ryder chuckled, as DJ turned and ran in her direction. "Quick baby, he's comin'." she said, leaning carefully over the back of the couch. She picked him up and held him close to her, looking up at Dean as he stopped infront of her. "Why hello?" she said, as he leant down. "Hey yourself." he said, as she leaned up to him. He kissed her, and smiled when his son made a small yawn. Ryder kissed him back her free hand brushing his cheek, "Do you greet everyone that way?" she asked, as he pulled back. "Naw. Just the girls I'm married to." he answered, climbing over the back of the couch and sitting across from her. "Oh, that's okay then." Ryder said, winking at him. DJ sat in her crossed legs, looking from her to Dean his little eyes full of laughter. "What are you doin', hey?" Dean asked, tickling his son. Ryder laughed, and watched on smiling as her son's giggles got louder.

"Careful, babe." she said, as Dean's hand got close to bumping her side. Dean nodded, and pulled DJ over to him, "Sorry." he said, hugging his son, looking up at her with his gorgeous eyes. "Your too cute." she said, getting up and walking to the kitchen. "I wish you'd walk a little slower. Your gotta pull it open if you keep moving like that." Dean called, over his son's giggles. Ryder smiled to herself, he'd been alot more protective lately it was something that normally annoyed her, but this time it didn't. "I'll try." she said, passing DJ a bottle of apple juice, sitting slowly back down. "That's better." Dean said, as she laid her head on his shoulder. DJ laid back against Dean's chest, his hands holding the bottle to his mouth. Dean's arm was still in a sling, which surprised Ryder, normally he'd stop using it straight away. "It hurt still?" Ryder asked, pointing to his elbow. "Like a mother. I bumped it at work yesterday." Ryder smirked, "I thought you were supposed to be doing light work?" she said, raising an eyebrow at him. "You know me? I can't stand not working." he answered, kissing her cheek.

Dean looked at her properly, seeing something she'd tried to hide from him. "You don't wanna go back to the hospital, do you?" he asked, watching her face as she turned to him. "Not really." she answered. "Too much as gone down there." Dean nodded, "What are you going to do?" he asked, shifting DJ carefully. Ryder looked down, "I'll find something. I've done my placement, I passed. I got an account full of money, cause I don't spend it. YOU don't let me." she said, laughing as he frowned. "Why don't you start your own business?" Dean asked, a smile on his face. "Doing what?" she said, taking the empty bottle DJ held out to her, laughing as he burped loudly. "Good one, buddy." Dean said, chuckling. "What do you want your business to do?" he asked her, an encouraging smile on his face. One look told her he was serious, she'd been thinking about this herself, just didn't know how to ask him. "Thanks." she said, kissing him. He laughed and shook his head, "Your welc0me. I think." he said, kissing her again. "Funny how I never get sick of that." he said, watching as DJ climbed down to the floor, his red car in hand. "Your an idiot." Ryder said, sitting up properly her side beginning to bother her.

"Go lay down." Dean said, looking at the way her face had paled suddenly. "I think I might just do that." she said, slowly pulling herself up. DJ looked up at her, a frown on his little face. "Bed?" he asked, looking at Dean. "Yeah, Mommy's gonna lay down." Dean said, brushing his son's hair. "Need help?" Ryder shook her head. "Nah." she walked slowly down to the bedroom and crawled into bed, a small headache starting. She heard Dean walk up the hallway and close the door, he did that to stop DJ waking her up. "Dean?" she called, before he walked away. "Mmm?" he said, poking his head in. "Can you close the curtains?" He nodded, and sauntered over to the curtains, pulling them closed. He leaned against the mattress and kissed her. "I'll wake you for dinner, 'kay?" Ryder nodded, and cuddled into his pillow, falling asleep as soon as he closed the bedroom door.

----

Dean leaned against the door, eyes staring down at the floor. He knew she'd take a while to recover, her wound had become infected, but she was able to stay out of hospital as long as she stayed on her medication, kept her diet stable, and rested. DJ poked his head around the corner of the couch, eyes staring across the apartment to his father. Dean hadn't noticed, until he heard the small giggles escaping the boys lips. He smiled, and walked slowly down to the boy, getting onto the floor with him. "You like that don't you?" he said, pointing to the car. His son nodded, and pushed it towards him. Dean looked at the car, and smiled, he had an idea. DJ stood, and walked into Dean's arms, plopping down between his legs. Sam walked through the door, bags in his hands. "She asleep?" he asked, biting his lip. "Yeah. Don't worry she's a heavy sleeper." Sam nodded, and walked to the kitchen. "She any better?" he asked, unpacking the groceries. Dean stood, and picked up DJ. "Yeah, she was awake longer. Hardest thing for her is not being able to muck around with Deej." Dean said, sitting on the stool across from Sam. "That would be hard. She spends all day here with him." Dean nodded, looking down at his son. "He's good though. Keeps himself entertained."

Sam chuckled, a thought popping into his head. "Planning on a second?" he asked, looking up at Dean, eating a grape while he watched his brother's face change. A frown on his brow, "She's mentioned it. Wants a couple of years between them." Dean said, smiling. "Your bein' serious aren't you?" Sam asked, taking his nephew into his arms, giving Dean's sore arm a break. "Yeah, man. I actually want it aswell." Sam smiled, "That's so weird, man. You've like grown up in the passed 3 years." Dean nodded, "Kids'll do that to ya." Dean said, pointing to his son. "Sammy!" DJ said, pointing up at his uncle. "Hey, Deano." Sam said, laughing at his nephew's excitement. Sammy was the only one who called him Deano, it was just something he'd always called him. "How's your arm?" Sam asked, watching as Dean readjusted his sling. "Oh, man. I knocked it on a car yesterday. Feels like I broke it again." Sam laughed, "Told you, you'd do that. Pay up!" Sam said, shifting DJ to his other arm. "No, you said I'd get in a fight at the pool hall, not that I'd break it again at work." Dean said, laughing at Sam's face. "Ry said I'd break it at work." DJ giggled up at his uncle. "Woops." he said, shrugging. Dean and Sam cracked up laughing.

* * *

TWO MONTHS LATER..

October 13th, 2009 had come around quicker than they thought. Dean Jackson Winchester was now one whole year old, and boy had he grown. Ryder was all healed, and glad to be playing with her son again. Dean watched through the back window of Alan's kitchen as she chased their toddler around the yard. She'd never looked more beautiful than she did today, her hair was down and straight. A huge smile on her face as she sat down, her son jumping into her lap. Her legs were covered with tight black jeans, a white long sleeved shirt covered her torso. DJ was tickling her, a game that he'd taught his son to place from a young age. Dean watched as she stood up, taking her son's hand in her's as they walked back towards the house. Alan stepped next to Dean, smiling at the sight infront of him. "I never thought I'd see the day when Ryder wore heels." Alan said, looking to Dean. "Don't get too excited. There still boots." Dean answered, laughing at Alan's comment. "Ah, of course." he said, as Ryder stepped into the kitchen. "Man, he can run." she said, puffing slightly. Dean smiled, and scooped the boy into his arms. "You been tiring out your Mommy?" he said, lifting the boy up. "Yep." DJ answered, smiling back at Ryder. "She not broken no more." Ryder laughed, and kissed her son. "No, she's definitely not." Dean said, giving his wife a cheeky grin. "Oh, stop it." she said, slapping his arm.

Dean laughed, as Ryder left the room to answer the door. Alan looked at Dean with a raised eyebrow. "Don't explain. I don't want to know." he said, raising his hand. Dean chuckled and turned, Ryder was very quiet. He sat DJ in his highchair, and walked quietly alone the hallway. "Uh, Ry are you okay?" Dean asked from the doorway. "Yeah. Tommy was just leaving. Weren't you?" Ryder said, angrily. Dean frowned and stepped closer. "Who's Tommy?" he asked, reaching out and grabbing Ryder's hand, pulling her away from the dirty looking man. "He's no one." Ryder said, her hand grabbing his tightly. Dean looked the guy up and down, and turned to see Jackson behind his wife. "What are you doing here?" Jackson said, coming to stand next to Dean. "I came to apologize to her." Jackson growled, and looked at Dean. "You waited twelve years to apologize?" he spat, Dean finally realized who the guy was and tensed. Ryder's other arm came around his side, her hand resting on his stomach. "Don't Dean." she said, looking up at him. He looked at her and shook his head. "No." he said, letting her hand go. Grabbing the guy by the t-shirt and pushing him backwards out of the door. "Man, WHO ARE YOU?" Tommy yelled, trying to break out of Dean's grip. Dean didn't say anything, he just pushed the guy over.

Ryder came running out, standing infront of Dean pushing him away from the man on the ground. "DEAN! STOP IT!" she screamed, her hands pressed hard into his chest. "WHY? HE DID WORSE TO YOU!" he yelled back, eyes never looking away from the man on the ground. "BECAUSE YOU COULD KILL HIM! HE CAN'T FIGHT LIKE YOU CAN." she yelled back, tears in her eyes. Dean took her hand carefully, and pulled her away from the guy, his booted foot kicking the man in the crotch. "Next time you remember what you did to her, think of the pain you feel right now. Cause you got off lucky." Dean growled, looking at Ryder before storming back into the house. Ryder stood there, tears falling down her cheeks, she was supposed to be happy, her baby was a whole year old. But she wasn't, her husband had almost became a murderer right infront of her eyes. She looked back at Jackson, who moved forward and dragged the guy away. "It's okay, baby sis." he whispered, kissing her temple as the walked the guy off their property.


End file.
